How likely to catch the flu?

Thanks to all of you who responded. Hubby and I have decided to skip the party with our family's blessing.

The flu epidemic in the US is widespread, has cost lives and is no small matter. My daughter informs me that at least two of her guests had to cancel on account of the flu. The majority of you didn't think it was a good idea either and we took that into account as well.

Understandably we are disappointed, but plans are underway for another (make up) celebration. Thanks once again for caring and for all your sage advice.

My DF had just got over a lung infection on my 50th and also on my DS wedding day. We all told him to stay home on these occasions as he also has a heart condition. He's 85. I wouldn't like to sway you one way or the other . Just go with your own feelings and your DHs .

I’m of the opinion that you can’t live your life worrying about ‘what if?’ and IMO you’re just as likely to catch anything, ‘flu included, ar the checkout at your local supermarket or indeed at the GP surgery.

I understand your H is just recovering and possibly feeling vulnerable and so you must do what feels best, BUT is this something your H is concerned about or just you?

You are as likely to catch flu from someone in the local supermarket as you are at the party. I would go personally.

I agree Dianethearist. I was recommended Vicks First Defence by a doctor friend and now take it everywhere and use it whenever I am in contact with anyone with a cough or cold. I think it works very effectively.

If you can just go to see your daughter and then go back home, do so. Avoid any large gathering, but ideally you both should be at home so that neither of you get infected.

I would give it a miss as it's a big party rather than a small family do.
Your daughter will understand.

I am a firm believer in using Vicks First Defence , carry it in all my handbags, and car, every room in house too! I catch things very easily as I am on high dose,long term steroids..I have always used it if anyone sneezes near me-- before I go to supermarket or shops...and of course hand gel.. It seems to work for me..
My daughter and grandson had an awful bug at Christmas when they were staying here and we didn't catch it.. I also used the Dettol spray they are advertising too so that must have helped too..
But hubby does sound like he wont be well enough to go--daughter will understand I'm sure..

No, definitely do not go. His immune system is low at the moment and you would take a risk. I wish I hadn't listen to doctor's advise to do what my DH wanted, maybe he would have had another year!

Definitely give it a miss. Daughter I am sure will understand and your own and Dh health should take priority.

Personally I wouldn’t risk it, I heard a GP being interviewed and you are infectious probably the day before symptoms appear and 5-7 days after you recover. And crowds are risky.

Will it be possible to have a Skype link-up with the party for a few minutes at least?

Stay away from your daughters celebrations. It’s just a number with a 0 on the end. Do it all again with alivkey family dinner in restaurant at later/safer time. Your daughter will hate the thought of putting her dad at risk...and it’s her day and you don’t want her to be fretting through it all.

I wouldn't risk it, just plan another get together at home, she is bound to bring him some cake round..........get some champagne ready!

Yes, avoid if you cannot rely on others to prevent their transmission of the virus.

Make sure your elderly parents’ carers all have their ‘flu jab too. Even the 70% tri-strain protection is better than none.

He may not be up to the party, even without the threat of flu. Daughter will understand.

We are very limited because of DH's compromised immune system. In spite of our best efforts he picked up a stomach bug from DS at Christmas and still isn't completely over it. I'm sure your DD would agree that it's not worth the risk and she'd rather see him fit and well.

I wouldn't risk it either. DGD was off school today but we refused to look after her as we didn't know what germs she might be carrying. Her Dad had to stay home with her. I agree with Cherrytree that your DD would feel awful if any viruses were passed on at the party.

I'm sure your DD would be very upset if her father was unfortunate to catch a virus at her birthday party.

It is possible that she is also concerned about the risk to her DF health.

So although sad that her father (parents?) are only with her in spirit,
she would be free to enjoy herself more in the knowledge that her DF (+DM?) are safe at home.

Look forward to a lovely family meal or day out in the spring.?

But of course it is completely you and your DH choice

Good luck

On balance I would not risk it. So many people have been ill with viruses and it was reported that one reason was because people gathered together at Christmas. I would wait until later in the year and perhaps have a smaller lunch or whatever seems right. Of course you might go and be fine or even pick something up if you don't go. Go with your gut instinct.

I was in this position last year. We cancelled my 70th birthday bash which DD2 was going to host because DH was taken ill at Easter. He had already been in hospital last January with pneumonia then developed heart problems and skin cancer. Although he was quite recovered and urged me not to cancel I felt I could not take the risk especially with a three hour journey each way.

Have a get-together with them at a later day when the winter bugs are out of the way and your DH is feeling stronger.

No regrets at all. It's a shame to miss a family 'do' but health comes first especially in January with a 'flu epidemic on the go.

Don't know where that 'g' came from!

What a dilemma, a very difficult decision. Would you be able to go on your own? It seems a shame for your daughter to have neither parent present at such a long-anticipated celebration of her big birthday.g

I did not really mean at her celebration, but rather because of.

It is hard. My OH is very thin and ill with PD and the consultant told me that he is very vulnerable and if he got a chest infection it could be serious.

We look after two of our GC and when they have bugs it is hard to know what to do. Their parents understand the situation though.

I might say no to the party - very very reluctantly - your DD would feel awful if he got very ill at her celebration.