Worried about elderly father

Thanks, Urmstongran for your suggestion but I know that he wouldn't take anything unless it was prescribed by a doctor (and even then, he's wary!). It's taken until just recently to get him to agree to take a 'relaxant' tablet at night. Obviously, sometimes it doesn't work but usually it knocks him out!

Poor man - he sounds as though he has a generalised anxiety about his health, hence the need for constant reassurance. Perhaps a pharmacist could suggest a gentle relaxant like Kalms capsules? My friend takes one 3 times a day and finds they do ‘calm her nerves’.

Don't think she could disable the phone without him realising what she'd done (he's still pretty 'with it' in lots of ways) and it would cause yet another row/shouting match. Not much fun at 3am. He has a sleeping tablet and hot chocolate before bed. He doesn't always call them about not being able to sleep - it's other things too, like having a dry mouth and feeling like he can't swallow (he's had lots of checks at doctors and hospitals - there is nothing wrong with his throat).

Any chance of your Mum disabling the phone? Our landline can just be pulled out of the wall.

When my grandchildren were very young, I had to do this and hide the phone as they would press buttons that once resulted in an international call being made to a very confused stranger! Cost me a fortune !

Perhaps sleeping tablets, herbal or chemical, or a sleepy-tea might assist? Your Mum should be able to consult your GP with your Dad and explain that it is anxiety which keeps him awake and communicating.

Thanks for your replies.
Tanith - you can't speak to someone's GP about their health without their permission. But I have written to the GP expressing my concern.
Mumofmadboys - he does all this calling and mithering in the middle of the night. I don't really want him to ring me at 3 or 4am! (and my mum is there, remember. If he won't listen to her, he won't listen to me either).

Could you encourage him to phone you if he has a problem and then suggest you could decide together whether it is an emergency enough to phone for further help?

Could you speak to his GP?

Thanks, Tangerine, I appreciate your comment. It is very difficult but I know lots of people go through it.

I do feel sorry for you as you must be so worried about your father. Your poor father must be feeling frightened too.

I don't know what you can do but think you're right that his mind is probably starting to fail. We've had a lot of this in our family and it's all very difficult.

And by the way, within 10 minutes of them leaving, he was fast asleep....