OH has fractured femur - not a good situation

I am sure you are handling the situation in the way that is best for your OH and hope he is able to be moved to a more appropriate ward soon. I found it very difficult to complain when my mother was in hospital for weeks, for the very reasons you mention Luckygirl. I felt sorry for most of the overworked staff whose morale was low, but was also very concerned about her care. The ward basically functioned due to agency staff because of the shortage of NHS nurses. I was shocked to find many of them travelled several hundred miles, staying a few days. They informed me the pay and expenses more than compensated and they could not manage on NHS rates!

I think Luckygirl has it absolutely right. Not much point complaining right now. In order for a nurse to do all that they should be doing for one patient it would need them to ignore how many others? It's a workforce planning issue. It's an inappropriate ward for her DH to be in but there could be serious bed blocking in the ward he should be moved to. No easy solutions other than family being there to ensure he gets the care he really needs. Fingers crossed he can be moved ASAP.

It’s been a horrific situation lucky, there seems hope for a move to a more understanding and better staffed ward which is a positive this morning. Once you have energy please do feed back your observations, for the sake of those who have no one to fight on their behalf. In spite of it all I hope your husband is progressing. Good luck for your meeting with the PD nurse and best wishes to you all.

Lucky you need to find out who his named nurse is. It is unforgivable if they keep forgetting things they had planned to do for him. One can perhaps expect one small mistake but not the number that goes on there.

That does sound a good plan meeting the PD nurse this pm. She sounds as if she cares.

What type of ward is he on? I am well aware of patient confidentiality etc. but he must not be in a 4 bedded bay with anybody who has the hint of an infection.

Glad to hear you’ve enlisted some support in getting your husband moved somewhere more geared up to his particular needs. Your previous work experience will inform your understanding both of the nursing problems and the needs of other patients too, you’re a wise woman. But seeing things from all sides isn’t easy, keep looking after yourself too!

I am meeting the PD nurse on the ward today at 2 pm to discuss moving him to the ward the age care consultant (who also deals with PD and who knows OH well) is in charge of. I hope to be able to get this moving asap. And I will ask to speak to the consultant about the plan going forward.

My reluctance to complain at this stage is because the poor care is basically due to the staffing levels, over which the nurses have no control and with which I am sure they are equally frustrated; but I will be spelling it all out to the powers that be as soon as he is out of there.

I ask the nurses for something and they set off to do it but are waylaid by other patients all clamouring to have their needs met - and TBH they often simply forget what they were meant to be doing for OH. I have to go back and remind them all the time and they look so embarrassed about it.

My OH is lucky in that one of us is there with him from lunchtime onwards and we fight his corner.

I feel very sorry for the son of one of the patients, as the son clearly has a bit of an intellectual deficit but can see that things are not right for his father and deals with it in a rather aggressive way and is very distressed, which causes problems in the 4-bed bay. I am sure the nurses sigh as he walks in. He is right to be distressed, but his noisiness does not seem to help. And there are other patients who have no-one.

Lucky I agree with every word Bathsheba has said and today you must attempt to have another word with the PD nurse and get him moved TODAY. The care is appalling or non existent- please make a fuss before it goes too far.

You also do not want him to dislocate his new hip because he has struggled to do something and has had no nursing help.

Thinking of you this morning as you start another day of trying to do the right thing for your husband. You are a strong, loving wife and I'm full of admiration for you. xx

lucky so sorry to hear this. I cannot add anything except to say my thoughts are with you and your DDs.

Morning lucky. I hope you have a better day.

Lucky I am so shocked to read your post today. Shocked beyond measure. You are incredibly generous in your assessment of the staff, but I’m afraid being polite and meaning well doesn’t cut it with me. And it is surely not “unfailingly kind” to leave his food and drinks beyond his reach, nor to dress him after a bed bath in soiled clothing.

I’m appalled, to be honest, and I wish I had some words of wisdom, but I can only echo others’ suggestions of securing the services of a carer for him if that is within your means.

I do so hope the poor man can be moved to a more suitable and comfortable ward soon. You are all in my thoughts

Lucky I'm just very shocked that this is happening. It makes shocking reading; I had no idea things were this bad with the NHS.

Whilst it makes us cross thinking of you, your family and your poor DH, how much more distressing this is for you.

Right now you shouldn't have to be dealing with these basic caring/nursing issues, the staff should. You must be exhausted. ((Hugs))

Tuppnce that sounds like a good system but I think it is too sophisticated for that ward as they are so "busy". Basic nursing care is so lacking there.

From my experience locally older/elderly patients deemed “frail” (as surely your DH must be) are put on a special “red tray” scheme which stipulates that someone must sit with them, helping as necessary, to make sure they eat all of each meal. Patient notes also have a space to record food and fluids each day which you can check any time you are there.
The “red tray status” is indicated on the patient’s name sign, including preferred form of address, name of consultant date of arrival in that ward and estimated date of discharge.
In the Stroke Ward I have also witnessed a nurse or HCA going round the beds to chat to each patient after their main meal to ask if they ate it and enjoyed it.

There's a difference between being short staffed and being thoughtless staff. No matter how busy a nurse is there's time to put food within reach! Also, if they're doing a bed bath there's no reason to not put clean PJs on if they're to hand. Neither of these is a training issue, just a common sense matter! I noticed a difference between individual nurses when I was in hospital. Some nurses thought about what they were doing and others just flew about like headless chickens achieving less than the others but able to say how busy they were!
I hope your DH can be moved to a more appropriate ward soon.

Hospitals have their own DBS checked volunteers who are allowed on the wards

You could speak to volunteer services. They might be able to send a mealtime companion to give you a bit of a break?

Is this the Emergency ward or Orthopaedic ward, Luckygirl?
If it is the emergency ward then, in my experience, they can be understaffed and rather chaotic but other, more specialised wards may be much better. I do hope that your DH can change wards as soon as he is able to be moved.

oh lucky, I just have no words to express what I want to say.
What is happening to the NHS is beyond the beyond.
I am so so sorry xxx hugs.

I’m upset and angry on your behalf lucky. Nothing to add to sensible other peoples thoughts do just sending love to you both.

Luckygirl I do apologise for appearing to be on your back all of the time but you are more than well aware what will happen and how long it takes to heal if DH's skin breaks at heels and/or sacrum. It is also very painful.

He should have a named nurse caring for him. I would ask her (and more if necessary) to help you to turn him with two pillows between his legs so that you can inspect his sacrum and see if there is a pressure sore.

You must put the problems in black and white- that is the only way something will be done. It is sheer negligence positioning food and drink where he cannot reach it. The staff are on a one-way track to being sued.

Oh dear. This is just a terrible situation to be in for your OH and for you. It's sounds as if it would be more appropriate for him to be moved to the ward which has been mentioned where they are more able to deal with his needs, rather than a busy acute ward where he is. I do hope this happens. I know how difficult it is as a relative to try and be assertive about care, or lack of it. As others have said PALS are an option, personally I didn't find them great when my mother was in, but it is their job to address the situation for you. I would write everything down about your OHs care that concerns you, and hand a copy to nurse in charge of the ward, and also PALS. It's much harder to ignore concerns when they have them in black and white, and may form the basis of a future complaint.

That is such a sad update, I do hope that your DH can be moved to a ward that is better suited to his needs
I continue to send kind thoughts

I have nothing to add to the sensible advice from other gransnetters but I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time and just wanted to send my best wishes to you and your dh.

Polite doesn't really cut it when nothing changes for the better and a patient's unnecessary suffering continues. I'm so sorry it is so hard, lucky