Hypochondriac friend.

That is so awful Monica. It is so easy to assume things and get it very wrong. I know, I've done it myself, but seriously try not to now having been wrong so many times. But for doctors to do it is unforgivable when people put their lives and trust in them. Yes there are people who cry wolf, but no one knows their body like the person living in it, so all tests should be done before deciding if there is a true problem.

I have a sister that seems to think illness is a competitive sport.

I have a friend like this, I usually ignore it but find it a bit irritating at times. Lots of hospital appointments, but she never wants a lift . The problem with lying is that you need a good memory, and hers is not. With my friend it is, without doubt, attention seeking which is very sad. She lies about a lot of things but we are all aware of this.

My mother was always at death’s door too. She nearly died having my sister and was unable to work for the rest of her life. She had abdominal pains and my father, in despair after 40 years of health complaints from her, sent her to the private hospital for tests. She was diagnosed with diverticulitis. A week later she dropped dead at 68. PM said three blocked arteries in her heart and kidney disease. There was no diverticulitis. I could hear her in my mind saying: I told you I was ill!

Might I just add that when I saw the GP who was propped up with pillows, promptly told me that " there's nothing wrong with you " !.
It turned out that there was a heart problem and failing kidneys . All because I'd told her I was missing a heartbeat !
No wonder I don't go to the GP's very often, it's made me feel like a nuisance as her words stuck with me so I now question myself, do I need to go ? I always think twice.

Sitting, reading this, with my left leg elevated - severely sprained ankle and broken bone - I had to smile.
My sister rang yesterday, all concern, and asked me how I was. I said, "in agony". Then had to sit and listen to her list of ailments, some serious, and of her recent visits to the hospital, physio and her doctor. 20 minutes later I managed to escape.
We love her, know what to expect and let her ramble.

Value the friendship, ignore the quirks.

My husband always has to go one better than me with ailments. Even when I broke my wrist his shoulder 'strain' was much more painful and debilitating.
I don't talk about my health issues any more as he always belittles them.

MissAdventure that expression 'at death's door' reminds me of a rather macabre joke my mother used when saying her name backwards (long story )

'Is your wife at the Gates of Death? Take Yeldar, it will pull her through.'

We have at least one lady in our elders group like this and it is fatal to ask her how she is because the enxt 45 mins are taken up telling you, in great detail. She's a very active 80.
.
Not so long since, she took me aside and told me she thought she had bowel cancer. Despite the fact she seems to visit her doctor every week for something or other, I advised her to go see him asap.

But as we talked, is seemed the only symptom was a 'gypy tummy' so I felt less concerned.

And then, after a long silence she said, 'Mind you, my son made a very spicy curry for us last night.'

I too hve a friend like this, always something wrong, always serious. Loves being in hospital, i suspect for the attention. She is so anorexic that her new hip keeps popping out!

minniemoo thank you for your kind words.

I have a friend and also a family member with this affliction.
What makes me angry is that they take up NHS resources. The friend has had numerous MRI and CT scans. She will also visit her GP up to 3 times a week.

How brave of her, considering all she's been through.

I spoke to my friend this evening.
She was feeling slightly better today and hopes for even more improvement tomorrow.
She had even been out for lunch.
She is going to France next weekend so that was exactly what I had expected.

We had an aunt who had been at death's door for the last 50 years.
The saying in our family when we thought someone was making a fuss about being ill, was that they were doing an aunt Lil.

This is the problem being able to tell those who genuinely are ill, but no one has done the right test, or managed to see the pattern in their symptoms that would diagnose it and those who for whatever reason, just think they are ill.

A family member had bowel cancer. When his wife developed the same symptoms the GP dismissed them. the chances of both husband and wife having the same cancer at the same time were tiny - but real and she died six months after her husband of the same disease.

Had the GP investigated when she first saw him, she could have had treatment and survived.

My hairdresser is a bit like this. I've been going to her over 20 years so she's actually more of a friend but every month she's got something different wrong or the existing issues have had more tests. We spend most of my appointment talking illness

sodapop I have heard that in France their detection rate of diseases is better than ours, so maybe vigilance helps.
If someone is constantly in pain or unwell, then to my (simplistic) mind the doctors haven't yet done the right test.

I knew a couple like that too sodapop. The medications looked like dolly-mixtures.

Health anxiety is endemic in France. Almost everyone has to leave the Drs with a prescription for a bag full of medication or appointments for further tests or they feel cheated.

There'd have been nothing down for you years ago reading the old doctor's books. If you had a boil on your "arris", death often followed.

I have a good friend who seems to "collect" illnesses. She has trouble with her back, elbow, wrist, (not due to arthritis) eye, bowel, burning tongue syndrome, depression. There is probably more, her poor GP must cringe when he sees her coming. I don't mention to her if I'm ever feeling rough.

There was an interesting article about this in "The Times" yesterday, about a young woman whose life had been taken over by worrying about her symptoms, real or imagined. She even paid for a private GP so she could contact her, and said the only time she felt calm was when she was undergoing tests. It must be dreadful to feel like this, I understand the writer was about to begin CBT to help cure her symptoms. Sounds like a laughing matter but must be hell: in the old days you referred to a medical dictionary, but Google offers you thousands of pages on each ailment. Having worked for GP's for years, I know how we all dreaded the "worried well"!

Maybe some people feel more pain than others and we shouldn't not believe them if they really do feel unwell.

I have a friend who does the opposite and just tells everyone else how run down and tired they look.

pinkquartz, it is awful when they miss something. Happens now and then but is so tragic for the family involved. I'm so sorry you lost your much loved sister .