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Hypochondriac friend.

(65 Posts)
annsixty Wed 17-Jul-19 12:00:15

I must get this off my chest and then forget it.
I have a good friend, she is also a neighbour.
She is kind and very generous.

I like her a lot, but she can’t resist exaggerating her illnesses.

A few weeks ago I had trouble with my back, it lasted for several days then slowly improved.
The next day hers started being painful.
She has been back and forth to the GP.
He gave her cocodamol. She asked for something stronger but he wouldn’t prescribe anything else.
She now says she “may” have to have a spinal op.
She has been “promised” lots of ops which have never happened.

She Is due to go on holiday to France very soon, I wonder what will happen.
This morning she came out of her house, walked very easily up 4 steps to her drive and got easily into her D’s car.
Do any of you know people like this and do you laugh it off or fume?

shysal Wed 17-Jul-19 12:06:59

I used to have a family doctor who had always had what I had, but worse. For example he had driven to Oxford from Cornwall with severe labyrinthitis. I don't think so, the real thing is prostrating. The only ailment he hadn't also had was vaginal thrush!

fizzers Wed 17-Jul-19 12:38:46

I used to have a boss like this, she claimed to have everything ranging from Bird Flu, Pig Flu, Legionnaires disease, why she even had sepsis over one weekend! the last straw was when she claimed to be going deaf and went through going to have her hearing tested and picking hearing aids out of the brochure, I had a bet with my work colleagues ( who didn't know her as well as I did ) that these hearing aids would not happen, and sure enough they didn't. The last time I heard of her she was claiming to have a bad heart. Used to make my blood boil with these out and out lies

Notsooldat75 Wed 17-Jul-19 12:46:08

My husband was like this when he was alive, he was always so much worse than anyone else, he was ‘cured’ of this habit when I had really bad period pain (paracetamol, hot water bottle etc) and he started telling me he knew how I felt as he had ‘caught the same bug’!

Minniemoo Wed 17-Jul-19 12:46:37

I had a 'hypochondriac' friend. Endless trips to the GP. We were at a loss as blood tests and scans were fine. We did wonder if she had health anxiety. Her GPs were becoming less than helpful. IBS they told her. They wanted her to take anti depressants and go to CBT. She eventually went to a private GP and it was discovered that she had Stage IV bowel cancer. Tricky one. She was only 32 and the doctors never dreamt to test for it. Very sad.

Grandma70s Wed 17-Jul-19 13:02:16

I think some people who could be described as hypochondriac are just frightened. They are afraid every twinge might be something serious.

The ones who have always had the same illnesses as you, only worse, are trying to show that they understand what you feel like.

Poppyred Wed 17-Jul-19 13:06:22

You have to feel sorry for them and thank the lord that you have more sense!

Jane10 Wed 17-Jul-19 13:10:26

These people probably really feel they are experiencing illness.

pinkquartz Wed 17-Jul-19 13:12:17

minniemoo that is very sad. i had a sister who was not listened to by GP and others. I listened but didn't know what to suggest. her postmortem showed 3 diseases of which 2 were terminal and the one very painful.
All her GP ever gave her was Prozac. I will never stop missing her.

SalsaQueen Wed 17-Jul-19 14:02:03

I know quite a few people like that. One friend said she'd got "terrible Eczema", which turns out to be a small rash about the size of a 10p piece, caused by the nickel in her watch. It irritates me but I say nothing....

Doodle Wed 17-Jul-19 14:07:43

I think we all know someone like this. I have a friend, who whatever is going on in someone’s life, health or otherwise has been there, done it and bought the T shirt as they say. It doesn’t extend to bragging about wealth fortunately but only in terms of has suffered the same, seen the same, been through the same. Can’t complain though as she is also very kind and the first to offer help.

eazybee Wed 17-Jul-19 14:14:29

Yes. I have one; it may be anxiety, or it may be attention seeking but she sure as hell talks about it. All the time.

Blinko Wed 17-Jul-19 14:16:49

My friend whom I've known since school days is diabetic but 'can't help' stuffing cakes and biscuits at every opportunity. Not too surprisingly, she suffers with her health. She must weigh twice what she did at school. She spends a fortune in addition to NHS services on teeth, eyesight, joints, you name it.

She has become an old woman before her time. Such a shame.

EllanVannin Wed 17-Jul-19 14:25:52

I once had a female GP who sat in her chair propped up with pillows. I hadn't the heart to tell her what my problem was at the time so I told her that her need to see a doctor was greater than mine and left.
She's no longer at the surgery and hasn't been for a few years now. It was a long time before I visited the surgery again in case I had to see her.

I have met other people who have every ache and pain under the sun but who also manage to holiday/shop and generally enjoy themselves.
It's more to do with their minds that their bodies. Can't be doing with them.

EllanVannin Wed 17-Jul-19 14:26:36

* than * ( their bodies )

Minniemoo Wed 17-Jul-19 14:26:39

pinkquartz, it is awful when they miss something. Happens now and then but is so tragic for the family involved. I'm so sorry you lost your much loved sister .

Ellianne Wed 17-Jul-19 14:52:44

Maybe some people feel more pain than others and we shouldn't not believe them if they really do feel unwell.

I have a friend who does the opposite and just tells everyone else how run down and tired they look.

dahlia Wed 17-Jul-19 15:41:37

There was an interesting article about this in "The Times" yesterday, about a young woman whose life had been taken over by worrying about her symptoms, real or imagined. She even paid for a private GP so she could contact her, and said the only time she felt calm was when she was undergoing tests. It must be dreadful to feel like this, I understand the writer was about to begin CBT to help cure her symptoms. Sounds like a laughing matter but must be hell: in the old days you referred to a medical dictionary, but Google offers you thousands of pages on each ailment. Having worked for GP's for years, I know how we all dreaded the "worried well"!

ninathenana Wed 17-Jul-19 16:11:52

I have a good friend who seems to "collect" illnesses. She has trouble with her back, elbow, wrist, (not due to arthritis) eye, bowel, burning tongue syndrome, depression. There is probably more, her poor GP must cringe when he sees her coming. I don't mention to her if I'm ever feeling rough.

EllanVannin Wed 17-Jul-19 16:40:22

There'd have been nothing down for you years ago reading the old doctor's books. If you had a boil on your "arris", death often followed.

sodapop Wed 17-Jul-19 16:50:16

Health anxiety is endemic in France. Almost everyone has to leave the Drs with a prescription for a bag full of medication or appointments for further tests or they feel cheated.

EllanVannin Wed 17-Jul-19 16:55:09

I knew a couple like that too sodapop. The medications looked like dolly-mixtures.

Ellianne Wed 17-Jul-19 17:11:29

sodapop I have heard that in France their detection rate of diseases is better than ours, so maybe vigilance helps.
If someone is constantly in pain or unwell, then to my (simplistic) mind the doctors haven't yet done the right test.

Willow500 Wed 17-Jul-19 21:05:47

My hairdresser is a bit like this. I've been going to her over 20 years so she's actually more of a friend but every month she's got something different wrong or the existing issues have had more tests. We spend most of my appointment talking illness grin

M0nica Wed 17-Jul-19 21:43:22

This is the problem being able to tell those who genuinely are ill, but no one has done the right test, or managed to see the pattern in their symptoms that would diagnose it and those who for whatever reason, just think they are ill.

A family member had bowel cancer. When his wife developed the same symptoms the GP dismissed them. the chances of both husband and wife having the same cancer at the same time were tiny - but real and she died six months after her husband of the same disease.

Had the GP investigated when she first saw him, she could have had treatment and survived.