Just turned 50 and feeling morbid

Oh for goodness sake
Being alive at 49 so therefore approaching 50;sure beats the alternative
The best years of my life were the years following my 50th birthday.

Bijou - 96! Wow!
OP - I am same age and I think that it is easy to think of all the things we could have done, how life could be different and think that this is our life now, but really age IS just a number! I gave myself a good talking to lol and tried to figure out what my problem is. I have decided when young I did loads of new things and loved the risk and adventure of that. I was also fitter. So I have taken up running, will train for a marathon, and I have taken on a new part time job as a lecturer, to fit round my existing part time job. I also have a child at primary school. I have looked ahead and planning my future - my new part time job will keep me going until I no longer want to work, keeps my brain active, lovely workmates and the students keep me young! The running gives me a new challenge, keeps me fit and again a new social side when I join a club. The long holidays at Uni will give me time to do some new adventures, and also to see my daughter more.
I think it is good to plan ahead and see what you CAN do and what you WANT to do! I also want to learn to play the piano at some point!

I was in denial at 60. I then had a medical issue and learned that life's for living. I have pursued new hobbies, met new people and keeping touch with my friends.
Life is fun but sometimes you have to work at it.

feel .lol

i'm almost 62 and who knows how many years i have left .i have two many medical problems.kidneys/liver/brain trauma./arthritis. dont dwell on how much time. fill it with stuff to do. go volunteer for a charity.go out ,make each day count...even if you fell like s**t...

Just scrolled up and - case in point: Bijou is 96!!! Love it

The average life expectancy in the UK for women is 81 . . . so give yourself another 31 years, and if you take really good care of yourself (and barring an accident) you could have another 41.

I understand the panicky feeling. I just hit 56 and sometimes it really freaks me out, but there are many many people living wonderful healthy fulfilling long lives that are way older than me - so I try to focus on those. I also do a gratitude list every evening before I go to sleep and honestly I take comfort from the idea that when I get really old and infirm, as we all will if we live that long, I'll probably get to the place where I'll be ready to just go to sleep and not wake up one night.

The bottom line is that we all have to come to terms with our own mortality. It comes to people at different times. I think that the best way to deal with it, is to ponder for a while then put to one side and make the most of life. No one knows how long they have so one day at a time.

I’m 50 next year and I’m SO looking forward to it!!!
I have a 14 year old who keeps me busy (and poor!) ?
I only work part time now, which is great and I have no intention of kicking the bucket anytime soon!

Love each day as if it’s your last- we never know and just need to make the most of it all

Hi Anabelle01
Take heart lass, you're only a baby!
I remember (just) similar thoughts when I turned 50 and here I am at 83 still behaving like a hooligan on my Ninja motorbike which I will probably ride to London to collect my centenary telegram from King Charles - or King William. Of course it may be Queen Elizabeth but that would make her 110.

You've still got a lot of living to do girl - Get out and enjoy it!!!

When I was fifty I was too busy to wonder how many years I had left. It is only now at the age of 96 that I wonder how much longer I have. I have survived cancer twice and have ostearthritis in both knees and hip making walking painful but my bran and memory are still good. I live alone with some help with housework and garden.

In my 50s I became very aware of my mortality, but fortunately by the time I turned 60 I had kind of come to terms with it. What helped was seeing all sorts of reasons that I'd not want to live forever. For example if non of us died of natural causes, we'd all be faced with that horrific day the sun explodes and roasts us alive or an asteroid hits us, weeks after our advanced detection systems have warned us and therefore weeks of panic. Compared with that, the idea of dying in a hospital bed is positively euthanetic.

I felt the same at 60 - I was fine with it until I started loosing my balance easily and had a tooth removed that distorted my speech. Everyone thought I was drunk all the time thereafter, although I don’t really drink!! I try to dwell on the positive and treat each day as if it’s my last - as one day I’ll be right. I’ve been very fortunate in life and whilst I don’t like the limitations of ageing but I’m acutely aware the alternative is no fun!! So mustn’t grumble and I must keep keeping on etc!!!

That’s good Annabelle. All birthdays with a nought are prone to make one think but 50! Wow it’s nothing at all. I am 20 years older than you and still do what I always did, though may feel a bit more tired. We walk with people in their 80 s and by walk I mean uphill and down dale and they are my inspiration.
Chins up, the world is your oyster.

I've just come out of my pilates class and am sitting in my car reading all your lovely positive messages.. You lovely people have inspired me no end, I have taken on board everything you've said and already feel much more sure of the future. Thank you so much

Please don't feel that way are there any other reasons why you should feel low....you have got so many years ahead of youxxxx

I think I understand how you feel Annabelle 01. It wasn’t about being 50 but about the speed with which that last decade has passed by. I have felt rather low since leaving a difficult job for health reasons as I haven’t found another so am really in very early retirement. I think I did that too soon, but I am trying to be grateful for each day. As people have said, we don’t know how long we have left. I am not good at following my own advice but do try not to be too hard on yourself . There may be many factors causing you to feel like this, not least the menopausal issues. ? for you, if that helps at all and moral support as you can’t help the way you feel. I do hope it passes soon.

Annabelle01 At fifty, I decided to write a novel about it. My protagonist dreaded the event. The novel is funny, sad and truthful. It took me 10 years to write (my Mum died and I couldn't focus for a long time) and I just squeaked in publication before my 60th. At 67 I am about to publish the sequel but, in between, have won several short story competitions and had a world trip as well as having two hip replacements and various other enlightening and catastrophic life events. 50? You're a baby - but yes, the hot flushes are a pain. Think of them as power surges. BTW the novel is called TERRIBLE WITH RAISINS...Growing up at fifty...

Goodness by your reckoning OP I only have 7 years left. People on average live a lot longer than 70 these days.
You sound as though you may be depressed, suddenly realising our mortality is hard. Statistically though you have many, many years left. Make the most of them by living them to the full.

Don't dwell on what MIGHT happen! I'm 73 and enjoying life with Mme SS. I might be getting on but most people are amazed when they realise my actual age. It's not that I'm without problems: I'm diabetic but what the heck I actually FEEL about 45. I've just sold my Harley Davidson bike and I'm planning on buying a very nice sporty convertible. Live, enjoy life, don't smoke, don't drink too much, be happy and always make plans for the future. You'll last a long time, I'm sure!

I was still cheerful at 50, amused by being 60, but 70 did make me feel old, and now I am a few months off 80, which I just find impossible to believe!

A couple of nights ago I came across some letters exchanged with my new boyfriend when I was 24....not love letters tied in blue ribbon, but affectionate! Reading them, I still felt the person I was then, and fifty five years later......still with him, four wonderful children and nine super grandchildren, lots of wonderful times ....I can't complain, but was somehow upset that all those years had telescoped into a dream.

Yes - a little - but 60 was great! I think when a woman reaches 50 she sometimes is having to cope with menopause, children leaving home/getting married etc and it's a lot to cope with. Don't be hard on your self - you can't do anything about it but negative thoughts with only make you ill.

I know what you mean Annabelle when I was approaching my 50th birthday whenever anyone mentioned it I would start crying my daughters thought I was going mad.
So last year when approaching my 60th I decided me and hubby would go to Rome so that I wouldn’t think about it and it worked.
But I often look at my youngest grandson who has just had his first birthday and fill up thinking I’m not going to see him grow into a man.
And think of something that happened 20 years ago and think I will be lucky if I lived that long again, I think it’s just that we are enjoying our lives and can’t bare the thought of leaving everyone, I think it’s quite common for us to become aware of our own mortality as we get older.

I turned 50 this year too and while I hope I’m going to live beyond 70 I certainly know where you’re coming from. My mum died of cancer at 71 after being fit and healthy all her life and I’m definitely starting to hear about more people that I know, or know of, dying. I suppose I’m more aware of my own mortality while hoping I live longer than my mum who was definitely not ready to go.