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What if...?

(60 Posts)
BlueSky Fri 31-Jan-20 10:19:22

I suffer from 'What ifs' and this is my latest. What if DH and I were in an accident together who would inform our children and how would they find them as they live abroad? We have no other close relatives nearby. As you can see my mind can be quite lively especially in the early hours ...confused

moggie57 Sat 01-Feb-20 12:13:29

make sure you got a book with contact numbers in .for emergencies .and in a good place that someone would find it IF there was an emegency.

Chestnut Sat 01-Feb-20 12:09:02

Ladymuck and others who live alone, is there a close friend or relative you can send a text to every morning saying 'Good morning, I'm still standing!' Maybe at 10am every day. If there is no text they can phone you. If you are unwell you can send 'Help me'. It's the only way you can be sure someone will be alerted to your plight. There are also 'alarms for the elderly' (Google search) as I said before.

Theoddbird Sat 01-Feb-20 11:51:48

My children come up if ICE is searched on my phone.

ladymuck Sat 01-Feb-20 11:40:37

This is something I worry about, because I'm a recluse. If anything happened to me, my pets would starve because no-one would notice I wasn't around.

Jan51 Sat 01-Feb-20 11:35:55

My dad aalways had a notebook in his jacket pocket. He had his details and our contact details inside the front cover and if he was travelling any distance, to visit relatives etc, he would write there details in the book too.
He died in his sleep but luckily he was due to go out to a painting class with a neighbour and when she couldn't contact him by mid morning ( to check if they were lunching first) she went to look through the letterbox and saw the living room curtains were still shut so contacted another neighbour who had a key and they went in and found him. Unfortunately we had the shock of the police turning up on our doorstep to inform us.

grandtanteJE65 Sat 01-Feb-20 11:34:51

I too carry a card with my husband and son's names and telephone numbers on it our address and telephone numbers.

It also has information as to the things I am allergic to.

Most countries, except Denmark and the UK require you to carry proof of your identity at all times, so when travelling abroad I always carry my passport.

My aunt, who lived alone until her death at 89, had in her latter years and agreement with a next-door neighbour that whichever woman got up first phoned the other to wish her good morning. If she got no reply, she used the spare key to the other flat to make sure the other person was alive and well.

patricia1958 Sat 01-Feb-20 11:28:42

You can put in your mobile phone ICE it stands for incase of emergency it's something emergency services look for all you do is put it in as a contact put ice then the daughter or son and their phone number this is good to have for anyone even them who live alone and dont go out like me

Growing0ldDisgracefully Sat 01-Feb-20 11:02:26

Good point Bluesky, I was just about to ask the same question! Very useful post you've started, I didn't know about the ICE facility so have learned something useful, thanks.

BlueSky Sat 01-Feb-20 10:35:53

Really speaking then everybody should wear a personal alarm, as you could have a fall/emergency at any age. Anyway who answers the emergency call? Family or directly to the emergency services if you don't have family nearby?

Summerstorm Sat 01-Feb-20 10:05:24

ICE is a great idea I used something similar when I was childminding or picking up grandchildren from school/ nursery etc with phone numbers of said school/nursery and parents

Vintagegirl Sat 01-Feb-20 10:02:31

Those personal alarms e.g. worn as a bracelet or pendant are designed to be waterproof so keep on on bathroom!

Juliet27 Sat 01-Feb-20 09:47:57

Yes CrazyH that would bother me too and maybe the dog would eat me!!

M0nica Fri 31-Jan-20 20:27:08

When DH was travelling a lot and I was often home alone with 2 very small children I arranged with my parents to ring them every morning and if I didn't ring them they would ring me.

Nowadays, with mobile phones, just send a text every morning to a family member, even if all it says is 'hallo', then if it doesn't come they know to ring and check.

And get a personal alarm and wear it, so that in case of a fall or emergency, just pressing it will be enough.

BlueSky Fri 31-Jan-20 18:17:13

TwiceAsNice ICE means 'in case of emergency ' and you can enter details of your next of kin/contacts you want alerted. What I didn't know is that any first aider could access this info on your phone even if it's locked, which obviously is going to be very helpful.

kittylester Fri 31-Jan-20 17:36:54

We have an informal neighbourhood watch among 4 neighbours. We just keep an eye on curtains and car movements. We know who has the key for which house (we dont all have all of them) and we have contact numbers for relatives.

This worked well when a neighbour dudnt open her curtains and didnt answer the phone. The relevant person rang her daughter to be told that she had book a last minute deal and was in Turkey!! And, in her excitement to go away, forgot to tell us.

TwiceAsNice Fri 31-Jan-20 17:30:35

I live alone but in the next street to my daughters. DD2 contacts me every day. If she got no answer she would be straight round. By the way what is ICE please I have never heard of it.

Chestnut Fri 31-Jan-20 15:54:26

crazyH anyone who lives alone and dies in their sleep will just have a good lie-in before they are found. I can't see any other solution. ? At least you will have a comfortable place to lie which is better than the floor. Have an alarm system then you may have a chance of contacting someone.

Gymstagran Fri 31-Jan-20 15:06:19

Jaycee5 I like your post. It made me giggle

crazyH Fri 31-Jan-20 14:59:04

My worry is - if I die in my sleep, who will know? My neighbour's will just presume I am having a lie-in. If my family ring and get no answer, they will just presume that I have gone out, because I do go out most days. It will be at least a week before I am missed ?
Hmmmmmm......

Newquay Fri 31-Jan-20 14:49:52

There’s a Buddi “watch” which you can wear-waterproof too. If you fall it will alert their centre or whoever you’ve nominated. I’ll invest in one before long.
I have ICE on mob and always keep mob on my person (inside bra if, annoyingly, no pocket-M&S please take note!).
We have a file in our writing desk with Wills and paperwork in including notes of accounts etc. and a list I found (on t’internet, where else?) headed “things you need to do after a death” so it has all our necessary details.
We bank with Nationwide and think they have a service to guide you through things after a death.
Sadly, it will happen one day. . .

kittylester Fri 31-Jan-20 14:49:16

www.lions105sw.org.uk/district-projects/message-in-a-bottle/

This might be useful.

Pittcity Fri 31-Jan-20 14:40:26

On an Android phone you go to Contacts and find your profile... there should be an option to add emergency contacts, medical details and other notes. All these are accessible by pressing Emergency Call on the PIN screen.
I also have an app from our local Air Ambulance that can pinpoint your location or What 3 Words is good if you need to give your location and you don't know where you are.

tanith Fri 31-Jan-20 12:02:42

I didn’t know that cornergran even though I’ve had ICE in my phone for a good while.

BlueSky Fri 31-Jan-20 11:51:53

Great points to think about! I will put the ICE info on my mobile as I didn't realise it could be seen on a locked screen in an emergency. But then what if my phone gets smashed? Seriously thanks a few good points to put into practice, hopefully it won't be needed as we'll probably depart separately! smile

Chestnut Fri 31-Jan-20 11:27:24

Google search 'home alarm for elderly' and you'll find various systems for sending an alarm if you fall or become ill. This is ideal for those living on their own, because even if you are contacted daily by relatives that could be too late.