Black Dog Gang 7

Hi everyone and welcome Lizbethann . I am a new member and have found everyone so kind and understanding here. It is so good to be able to ‘talk’ to people who know how you feel. Feeling anxious often makes you feel lonely and tired doesn,t it.
Doodle - yes I take daily meds and blood thinners for AF. I talk to my sister every weekend and she was so happy to be out in the woods and hills again after such a long and debilitating illness.
Lavender just do a little bit of packing a day . Would it help to sort it into categories eg Keep - charity - bin!, then you,ll only have to pack stuff you really like and need. Can you Face Time your daughter and Grandaughter ? Its a great way to “see “ your loved ones.
Annie how exciting helping your DGD chose a dog. You know dogs well so will be able to guide her in the right doggy direction. Maybe a rescue dog? Hope you are ok today.
Today I had lunch out for the first time since Lockdown. I went with my daughter in her lunch break to a nice little cafe run by local ladies. I was so nervous but they had done all they could to make it safe and yummy food. I didn,t stop shaking all the time but really enjoyed doing something that we used to do . So grateful the anxious sick feeling has mostly gone now.
I hope you have all found something to enjoy today and love to all

Chrissy yes DH is dear husband.
The reason I asked if you had ever had cancer was to see if you had reason for these fears of yours. Also I wonder if lack of knowledge (I don’t mean that in any rude or unkind way) could be part of it.
Years ago when I was told my DH needed a triple bypass ( over 20 years ago) I was devastated. I was convinced he would die and that he stood little if any chance of survival. Complete panic set in. A few days later and lots of research, my spirits started to lift. There was a good success rate. I understood a lot more of what was involved and the various options. Don’t get me wrong, it was a worrying time but he survived that and many other things since. My dear SIL survived her cancer too and went on to have many more years of life.
There is hope these days for all sorts of illnesses. Don’t assume the worst.
Have just read your second post. I can understand a bit now of where you are coming from. Until someone tells you that you are ill, you are not but you keep worrying in case you are.
In some ways that’s how I treat my own family worry. Hard to deal with.
Bluesky glad you got to see a sympathetic doctor. Hopefully the endoscopy or CT scan will show up if anything is wrong and calm your fears.
Nonnie Annie how are you doing?
Hope everyone is ok.

Chrissy you are not stupid, please, please don’t say that about yourself, phobias are not stupid, they are an illness as is
depression.

I wish we could help you with the avoidance, have you had
counselling?

Keep talking to us, it may help you , I so hope so x

Nonnie No problem, I understand what you’re saying now.

Anniebach I understand what you’re saying I really do. I also know that my way of handling things by avoiding them is really stupid. Even if I explained my way of looking at anything to do with medical tests etc I doubt that anyone would understand, my family definitely don’t. I’ll explain a small part of it. As I put off seeing the GP in case they find something, as time goes on I think that, if anything nasty is found, it will be too late to do anything about it. I know that this doesn’t make sense as I would have a better chance of a good outcome if I saw the GP straight away but I’m just so scared of hearing anything bad from them. I’ve just been for a cholesterol blood test to see if the statins I’m taking are helping. I don’t think that I will be able to carry on taking them because I have terrible leg pain. Now I’m not sure if the leg pain started before or after I started on the statins. Reading this back it sounds even more stupid. I just don’t know anymore, everything is just a mess.

BlueSky glad you saw a GP, a scan or endoscopy is best,
I had scan for ulcer, endoscopy for IBS, once diagnosed the right treatment given x

Chrissy I am concerned you avoid a GP incase they find something serious.

If we have niggly toothache we see the dentist and probably a
small filling, if we avoid going to the dentist, put up with the
niggly toothache until we finally have to see the dentist ? result
tooth extraction. This could be avoided if we had visited the
dentist sooner.

Worrying whilst waiting for test results does cause anxiety but
for a short time, avoiding possible tests means the anxiety
goes on and on and on . Sending you hugs x

Morning all. Well yet another call to the doctors and this time I got to see one of the GP in the practice. Such a caring sympathetic doctor, he examined me, asked a lot of questions then referred me for an endoscopy or CT scan as they seem to do at the moment. While I didn't particularly want to have this I know that it's needed and be wasting my time otherwise. In the meantime he prescribed some old fashioned Gaviscon liquid which I was going to buy anyway! Wish I could ask for this particular doctor in the future as I've got confidence in him, but we can only have pot luck.

Sorry Chrissey I tend to ramble a bit. I mean that I don't worry about my own health but I worry too much about everything to do with the people I love, including their health. I anticipate that there is something really bad waiting round the corner to step out and hit me, nothing specific but another unexpected thing to hurt me. Can't help it, since the age of 7, things have hit me, things that very few people have to deal with, things others can't understand because they haven't experienced them.

Annie I feel your frustration.

Purple I think you should talk to your GP. If an antidepressant helps, even if you have to take it long term, surely it would be better than the way you are feeling now. Many of us on here are taking them and finding them helpful.

Doodle Sun 06-Sep-20 10:56:55 I agree

Anniebach Sun 06-Sep-20 11:03:20 Agree

Flutter sometimes 'managing' is all we can do, so keep it up. Yes I sometimes wonder about Whyx3 but assume she is happy enough to not come back on GN

Scaredy lovely about your sister I can see how that would be a mood booster.

Welcome Lizbeth you will find plenty of support here. Do get husband to check his tax bill carefully, HMRC make lots of mistakes especially if it is anything other than PAYE. I think it would be more normal to get a rebate after retiring but if he has taken huge chunk out of his pension fund that would cause a tax bill.

Lavender moving is stressful but you are not alone with putting things in boxes and storing them away. DH has been doing that for years and still have unopened boxes from many moves back! I no longer go into his study because of all the boxes!

Chrissy I understand the reason behind your HA now, I have a friend who is 'intolerant' of all sorts of food and discovered why when I met her mother. Not sure there is anything we can do about such learned behaviour but accept it.

Yes Doodle that 'deep rooted fear', in my case for nothing in particular, just something which is about to hit me.

The knitting has taken over my life, end in sight but I wish there wasn't a deadline.

Doodle No I’ve never had cancer and I’m not sure exactly where my anxieties about it stemmed from. It has taken over my life and my anxiety is so bad some days that I get depersonalisation which is scary. I’m about to try acupuncture as I’m prepared to try anything.

I think DH stands for dear husband, is that right? If so, I’m very sorry to hear that your hubby has cancer and your SIL has also had it.

Hi all x

How is everyone today ?

Good night all x

Chrissy have you ever had cancer? My DH has and he now has blood cancer. My SIL also had cancer. It is not necessarily a terminal illness these days. Many people survive.
I suffer anxiety too but my worries are for my family, not my health. I think all of us have a deep rooted fear. Not necessarily of the same thing but the anxiety is the same for us all. Hope you sleep well tonight.
A dog will be a lovely companion for your DGD Annie . As you well know they keep you busy but provide good comfort.
Is there a particular breed she is interested in?
Sleep well all x

Annie Doodle hot tub help me chill. I will be emptying it for winter soon. ?
Annie a puppy how lovely..

Chrissy I cannot deal with tests. Bloods they same, I have been waiting since December for camera on my bowels, with the covid have had to wait, I have been a mess waiting. Had it done 2 weeks ago all is ok (phew) thank goodness. I always think the worst...
The depression doesn’t help I not sure if the HA brings on the depression or the other way round, it’s a constant battle..

Everyone on hear are lovely caring people.. hear for one another..

Annie give good advice she’s very wise, she’s is our rock!!

Lizbethan welcome, yes we all understand, anxiety, depression, OCD, phobias etc. I personally believe we should not give up hope of recovery, do talk whenever you wish, always someone on this thread every day x

lavender a house move ? Don’t exhaust yourself please. You will see them again my love. Physiotherapists ? The hand
Physiotherapist asked me in March to email photographs of
my hands, I did, she replied ‘thank you’ ! Take care with the packing . x
Joyce you and your hot tub, ? x

Scaredycat great you talked to your sister on FaceTime x

Doodle how are you ? I have told you all I have been house hunting ,on the internet, with my elder granddaughter, today,
she has decided she must have a dog, brought up with them in
her own home and mine, so now looking for a puppy ! Take
care my love x

Joce345 I totally understand that. When I first started suffering with health anxiety I was at the doctors constantly asking for this or that to be checked. Now I’ve gone completely the other way, I avoid going to see the GP just in case they find something. I am a total wreck if I have to have any tests, not because of the tests themselves but because of waiting for the results. Even blood tests send me into a spin.

Doodle I have an enormous fear of finding out I’ve got a terminal illness, predominantly cancer. No obvious reason for it apart from having a dad who was always focused on his health.

Lizbethann of course you are welcome to join in. We all understand anxiety, depression and stress here. There are others on this thread who have health anxiety too.
Sounds as though you are on furlough from work. Lots of stress for you. Do you feel there is something else wrong apart from the anxiety?
Chrissy have you a particular health fear at the moment or are you just anxious about your health in general?
Scaredycat sorry I didn’t see your post earlier, I must have been posting myself. Sorry about the AF. Do you have any meds that calm it down? How lovely to chat to your sister. Hope she is enjoying getting out for a walk.
Lavender a house move is a big job. Do a bit at a time is my advice and don’t leave it for the last minute like I did. Total panic ?. Nice to hear your DD and DGD spent some time together. Do you talk to your DD on the phone much?
Joce a hot tub sounds lovely. Hope you are feeling ok.
Annie how have you been today.
Take care all and sleep well. Try not to worry. When your head hits the pillow think of something nice. x

Lizbeth, Chrissy. Wellcome I have health anxiety, and depression. I’m 65, I totally understand where you are coming from. I don’t think there is a cure for HA it’s something I think we have to learn to live with.. I will avoid going to or talking to the GP at all costs it scares me so much. Yes that constantly checking errr. Thinking the worst no matter what anyone says.. constant worrying 24/7..
everyone on the black dog understands and listen if you want to talk...
hope everyone’s had a good weekend.

Annie how are you today.

I have just been in the hot tub in the rain lovely..

Hope you all have a peaceful night.. ?

Hello everyone
Hope you are alright Annie I am sorry you are going round in circles, it is so frustrating. There seems to be this inability, whether intentional or otherwise, to give any sort of help. The physiotherapist I spoke to a few weeks ago, and who gave me knee injections in the past, just said they were unable to do them, and sent me some knee exercises via email - I ask you! The consultant didn't seem very impressed when I told him. Hope you are in less pain xx
Lizbethann" and *Chrissy good to see you. Lots of understanding people here.
Flutterby hope things settle down for you.
Glad you enjoyed your Facetime with your dear sister Scaredycat, such an uplift for you.
I am meeting myself coming back at the moment - I have a house move on the horizon and have been trying very hard to get rid of all this clutter - where on earth it has all come from I don't know. What I have done is emptied two chests of drawers, put all the stuff in two boxes, and that's that - I shall take them with me and if I never open them again that will show how important they were! It is exhausting though and something that wakes me in the middle of the night thinking what else I have to do.
How are you Doodle, hope you and your family are ok.
My daughter and granddaughter had time together on Friday so that was a plus, and granddaughter rang me afterwards to say it went well. I do miss them, its almost 12 months since I last saw them, and I wonder at my age if I ever will see them again with all this lockdown going on.
Wishing you all a peaceful evening, and forgive me for not mentioning everyone, and a good nights sleep. Take care and love to all xx

Lizbethann55 I only joined 2 days ago, everyone seems very friendly and I feel that here people understand me which family definitely don’t. I’m 67 and, like you, my health anxiety is out of control at the moment. Lots of tears being shed and constantly checking my body. It’s so exhausting. I hope you enjoy being on this forum.

Hi. I have only just noticed this forum. Can anyone join? I am 65, on citalopram for the second time, and have health anxiety which is through the roof just now. Have chatted to an unknown GP a couple of times on the phone. He sounds nice, but how does he know I am ok when he hasn't even checked me over or done any tests. Struggling with being furloughed and waiting to hear when I will be going back and to which base. DH has retired and been stung with a huge tax bill, so he is stressed to the hilt. It would be nice if this is somewhere where people will understand. Thanks for listening. Xxxx

Flutterby at the bottom of this screen under Help and Information is a link to Privacy Settings. Click on that and drag all the little bars that show blue to make them show grey. When you get right to the end click submit. (That is if you don’t want to be monitored by anyone, the grey is off) .
If you log out of GN when you’ve finished posting you will probably have the same questions again. I don’t usually bother logging out so haven’t been asked those questions for a while.
I’m glad you got through last week. Hope things are ok on the family front. Take care ?

Hello everybody on this sunny Sunday afternoon. Hope you are having a good day.
Annie you are just so inspiring the way you deal with so much but still have such kindness and empathy for other people. Thank you.
Purple so sorry you feel so wretched - I think perhaps it is time you got some help from your GP . Your mental health is every bit as important as your physical health. Keep up the texts to your GC I am sure they love getting them.
Doodle I,m ok thank you after having another 4hour AFib session at 4am this morning!! Taking it easy today which does not come naturally as if I feel ok I like to keep busy. I hope you are enjoying your day.
Chrissie I do the mirror check ups too! I can go and look then 5mins later go again ,then again etc.
Something nice today FaceTimed with my sister who is in remission from cancer and she looks so well with a head of curly hair which was previously straight. She has been out in the country for a walk for the first time in over a year it made me very happy to hear that.

Flutterby you got through last week ? Definitely a ?, no have ?? x I don’t understand that data box thing either, I just clicked , no idea what I clicked for x

For anyone feeling down, fed up, I don’t mean battling depression, I recommend, if you have one of those Echo Dot
things, ask Alexa to play Fats Domino, I can’t move my legs but can wiggle my toes to the beat ?as a write this I am listening to ‘Walking to New Orleans ‘, I can’t even walk the garden path !