Black Dog 15

Hi everyone. Ive read your posts and excuse me for not posting individually.
Just come back from Karaoke at site entertainment clubhouse. Quite an experience. Pain has held off until this afternoon though now building but lovely morning at a place called Beverley which I'd never visited. Main blessing is seeing family and DGC.
Feel overwhelmed with love for them but also very fearful too. Cant explain.
I so hope,Doodle and DH are ok after seeing the nurses at hospital today.
Love to you all and thinking of you. All of you dear friends who are supportive to each other.
I wish the pain would stay away. I wish Doodle's DH's pain would stay away and leave him be.
Hoping you all have as peaceful a night as you can, in mind and body. X

I was glad to hear that you had Face times your sis over the weekend, Scaredycat
Well… its understandable to want to make the most of the sun, its been so rare.

A good day there yesterday, nadateturbe.

Allsorts its indescribably hard to lose something that way. Happened in a home robbery to my mum. Handbag taken with the most precious photos of her long gone husband. Because of the feeling someone can rob you of something that symbolises those things most precious.

Very good news on the DS front, HVDY. I hope there is more healing with g/friend.

Another coming in to see how Doodle and MrD are doing, in what must be one of the hardest times in your life together.

I was still in “can’t rest mode”this morning but had a good counselling session about the weekend with family. One outcome was that few families can last being on top of each other in small space with 4 kids one very disabled for 4 days and not to expect it. (reminds me of descriptions of christmas with rellies, must be more realistic)

One thing that came out is that DiL would probably be offended if I stayed in a hotel nearby and not with them, but if I stayed in the city nearby with a view to exploring living possibilities it could be seen differently.

In the past you see I had nipped up for an afternoon, or an over-nighter, but cant do that energy wise tho it would be ideal as in "little and often".

Therefore have been thinking very seriously indeed about moving and made phone enquiries as to retirement flats.

I did achieve bits of practical stuff that is long overdue and had a longish sleep this afternoon. I do realise a “low” is due to hit at some point well just have to try and be wise about imagining moving will solve head stuff tho it might be good family wise.

Best wishes to absent BD’s all.

Thinking of Doodle and her DH, wondering how the hospital appointment went. Also SweetpeaSue, hoping the family gathering is going well.

Hope all BDers have a quiet and restful night. x

Hi everyone.
Doodle- I do hope your poor DH and you too managed to get some rest last night. Something must be done to relieve his pain and so that you can both get some much needed rest. Hope todays Hospital visit was able to help in some way. Wishing you a peaceful night tonight.x
HVDY- we have had a really lovely Spring like day today - went out for the day. Extremely tired but it was worth it to be out in the sun.
Glad to hear the good news about your sons house. It’s such an xciting day when you pick up keys. You must be pleased that he has nice neighbours too- it makes such a difference.
Hope everyone else has had as good a day as possible.
Sleep peacefully allxx

How's everyone been today?

It's rained all Day here. Did aqua aerobics, then Son2 got the keys to his new house, so DH and I helped him to take some things there (lots in storage, which they'll get on Saturday, and he's waiting for delivery of new furniture next week). It's a lovely house, bigger than ours . The neighbours from both sides as well as directly opposite came round to welcome him, which was lovely. We'll have our house back in about a week . x

SweetpeaSue Well done on doing all that driving. I hope you have a lovely break with your family.

Doodle It must be awful for your poor husband to keep having pain. It's not nice for you to have to watch him and not be able to help much.

Wyllow Hope you have a good rest tonight.

Son2 is at his friend's, DH went out at 9pm to meet one of his friends, so I'm enjoying having the house to myself for a bit. "See" everyone on here tomorrow x

Evening all, hope you’ve all had a good day.
Nadaterturbe yes, I’m so grateful to Sweetpeasue for her post and found it very reassuring. Thank you for your kind words too. Shame you didn’t make it to Church but nice you had a nice visit to the toddler. They’re such a joy especially when you can hand them back!
Doodle yes, we go almost every week to watch GS play, as we did with our own DS. Funny doing it all again but so glad we can. My work is a 15 min drive away so not too bad. Sorry you had a bad night and hoping you have a better one tonight. Hope the hospital appointment goes well tomorrow 🤞.
Allsorts what a horrible thing to do to someone. Honestly some people just have no conscience or feeling for others. I’m sorry you are fighting, I understand exactly what you mean. Keep battling, you’ll get there. Our memories, even good ones, can be difficult at times. Take care.
Sweetpeasue I’m not in any pain thankfully and the bleeding has eased considerably but still needs checking out I think. I’m glad you have arrived safely and I hope you have a nice evening with your family.
Wyllow as others have said, it’s a good idea to visit your chosen city and spend some time there before making any big decisions. Hope you’ve enjoyed your duvet day today and are fully rested.
HVDY such a pity you’ve got to carry on with that lady but very admirable of you. I’m sorry you got let down by those prospective employers. Just common decency and consideration just doesn’t come naturally to some people, well a lot of people I think. The managers where I work are the same. Not nice to be treated like that.
Scaredycat yes, we’re pleased GS has a hobby he enjoys especially as it involves being in a group of others. He’s an only child and probably always will be, so it’s good for him to socialise. He’s a happy little boy and the light of our lives. You sound like you’ve had a busy time. I’m glad your sister’s doing well. You must be so relieved she’s come so far.
Bed for me now. Busy 2 days at work and spending the next 2 catching up and getting ready to go away on Thursday evening. Swimming lesson at 7 am tomorrow 🤦‍♀️ Hope everyone has a restful night and ❤️ To all xx

Overdone it very substantially tho done some good things, got into "cant stop high mode" maybe I'll be sensible (or unable to move!) tomorrow. Bests BD's xx see you then.

Sweetpeasue well done you, driving all the way. Not surprised you’re tired but what an achievement.
Hope you have something nice to eat with your sons and then a good nights sleep.
HVDY that sort of behaviour really annoys me. Why say they will iPhone when they don’t.
It’s difficult to keep conversation going with people who don’t have much going on in their lives. You are very good to phone someone every week. I couldn’t think of anything to say.
Wyllow have you had a restful day recovering from your trip? Are you feeling better now you’re home?
Scaredycat nice your DGD feels she can ask you to go with her to her appointment. Nice to see your stepson and wife too. You are obviously close.
Must be a relief to see your sister looking better. Hope she builds up her strength again.
My poor DH is getting a bit down about this constant pain. Last night his ankles were so painful he could hardly walk and couldn’t sleep well because of the pressure on them laying down. Tonight the ankles are still sore but now he has pain across his back and shoulders too. This seems to be never ending. He’s normally so cheerful I hate to see him like this.
Will see what they have to say at hospital tomorrow.

Just a quick post. Been a bit of a challenge. We got a bit lost. (I was driving - DH navigating) 😂 I drove all the way. ☺️
Met sons here and then had to drive out to nearest village for some bits. Really tired but just had a much needed cuppa and meeting sons soon at this bar/restaurant place on site.
Hope you are all ok. Will reply later.
Xxxxx

nadateturbe Aw, toddlers are lovely at that age, aren't they .

I applied, online for a job at an optician's (customer service, no experience, they said). Someone emailed and said she was impressed with my C.V., and could she ring me for a chat. She suggested a time, and I agreed. I sat and waited, she never rang! How bad-mannered. It would have taken 2 minutes for her to have messaged me saying they'd found someone more suitable, or whatever. I didn't want the job anyway eh .

Hope all BDers have been ok today.
SweetpeaSue Do let us all know how you've got on.

Allsorts and Doodle its sad having irreplaceable things stolen. How do people do it? They must have no conscience.
HVDY what a shame they can't find anyone else. You're very good. I would be tempted to disagree with her.
Sweetpeasue hope your journey was pleasant and you both OK.
Scaredycat I hope your dear sister manages to get out in the car. Also hope you are resting and ignoring the windows!
Doodle what can I say. Another bad night for you both. And so many health problems to deal with. I wonder what would cause the pulsating. Good luck at your appointment tomorrow.
I'm OK, - never 100% - like everyone else! But I did get out to visit and meet my husbands sisters granddaughter, (his great niece?) and was holding her on my knee. She's 13 months old. Loved every minute. Forgot my pains.😁 And had hot cross buns. On the bed resting. A good day.
Hope you all have a nice evening. Hi Wyllow3 EllieAnne and others.

Wyllow3 I do manage to talk to her about other things, but she doesn't cook, doesn't really see anyone much. She used to work, many years ago, as a nurse, so I ask her about her career. I also ask about her garden and plants. It's a shame she's like she is because otherwise she seems a nice lady. How are you feeling today?
Doodle Best of luck for your husband tomorrow. I hope he gets some proper answers/treatment.
ScaredyCat Nice to have coffee and cake .

Excellent post, Black Dog 15! Your perspective is extremely valuable, and I appreciate you taking the time to share it with me.

SweetPeaSue- hope you have arrived by now and settled in your caravan. The sun is shining and you are with your family-;you made a brave and significant decision to just go for it. Have a lovely time.
Whiff - I understand how you feel about your pendant - it was so special to you. I have a little garden stool that my son who died made for me at school and I would be so sad if I broke it let alone lost it. So glad you found your pendant.
Wyllow- I think your visit to family was beneficial in many ways. I too think a hotel is a good idea as you can have time out and also get the feel of living in your chosen city. Perhaps recce a couple of living possibilities too.
I think you are marvellous to have been away and very brave.
Enjoy your restful day at home.
Candy-/great your GS loves his football - he sounds like a little star. Sport is so good for children and teaches many life lessons. He will probably have a lifelong love of the game whether he makes it or not.
Hope you are able to get away too - it will do you good and help to take your mind off your worries at the moment. I do hope the bleeding stops soon.
Nadaturbe- hope you get to church next Sunday - it will be nice to meet some new people. You are right pacing is so difficult as a day when you feel stronger makes you want to fill it up!!
Doodle- oh not another bad night - you both must be worn out. It’s never the same twice is it - is the Hospital appointment for his legs? If not he really does need help such a shame as you loved your walks.
Yesterday I went with my eldest GD to a clinic appointment as she didn’t want to go alone. Then one of my stepsons and his wife came over for coffee and cake so a busy day.
Yes I FT my Sis over the weekend - she had a physio visit in the week as she has so little strength so has exercises to do. She looks better though and is hoping to be able to go out in the car- if she can get in it!! - and go up in her beloved hills.🤞
I hope you have a good day todayx
Allsorts - that must have been heartbreaking - I,m so sorry.
Yes it’s difficult when we think back to the lovely busy family times when we were younger- I hope you feel more settled soon.
HVDY- oh that lady sounds a charmer- you must have to constantly bite your tongue!!!
The sun is lovely today- trouble is the windows look filthy!! Job for DH I think. Still feel very tired for doing too much.

Love to allxx

Allsorts we all have things that are precious to us for sentimental rather than cost reasons. How awful to have your things stolen. My DIL had a necklace stolen in a burglary. It was one her father had bought for her wedding day and was the last thing he bought before he died. Insurance covered it but obviously it couldn’t be replaced.
Glad you have been feeling a bit better recently. Must be hard coping sometimes.
Sweetpeasue I’m glad you’re going. Better to have small amounts of time with the family and not push yourself than to go all out and then not be well. Good you’ve got a caravan of your own to relax in. Hope you get there without any trouble.
Wyllow hope you have a relaxing duvet day today. The town centre hotel sounds a good idea,
HVDY it’s good of you to continue talking to the lady while they try to find someone else. It must be difficult as she’s obviously very prejudiced. Good idea of Wyllow’s to try and get her talking of other things if that’s possible,
nadateturbe another bad night. Each one seems different.
Last night DH had really bad pain in his feet and couldn’t rest. Really wonder what is going on. It wasn’t RLS or cramp but pulsing sensation. We are going to cut down on the diuretics a bit today to see if that helps. Hospital appointment tomorrow.
How are you doing?

HVDY it is upsetting to hear all that bile poured out.
Are there ANY subjects - cooking, gardening, memories of past etc - that are neutral that you can get her onto?

SweetpeaSue Good luck with the driving. Have a stop somewhere for a cup of tea, and perhaps swap over to share the driving? Hope all goes well with your visit to see your family. The weather is lovely for it.
ScaredyCat, EllieAnne and others - hope you're ok.

I rang the charity about my call companion lady - I've been talking to her every Monday for about a year - they haven't got anyone else to ring her, so I agreed to carry on with it until someone is found. The lady hasn't got dementia or anything. When Rishi Sunak became PM, she actually said "Out of all those MPs, couldn't they have found a white man?! Does he even speak our language?" Unbelievable really.

I hope all BDers enjoy a bit of sunshine today x

Really good idea about staying in the city Wyllow3. I too thought of AirB&B as an alternative. For my family too, as the boys get older.
Enjoy a good rest today.
Doodle did you manage to get some sleep?

Candy6 Your little grandson obviously enjoys playing football, so that's good. If he gets picked out to play for a bigger club, that'll be a bonus. I hope the bleeding has stopped now.
nadateturbe I hope you're well and manage to find new friends at the church.
Wyllow It must have been nice to spend the time with family, but when they're so "full on" I suppose it gets exhausting. Perhaps an Air B&B might be an idea?
Doodle I hardly dare to ask, but how was last night for you and your husband?

I think the "nearby caravan" is a great compromise.

nadateturbe I know after the weekend I can't cope with 3.5 days full on family - needs to be a hotel. if I am well enough mid May or June I will book a town centre hotel to see what its like in the target city and go to the Quakers and see family in manageable chunks.

Today, as Sweetpeasue predicted, will be a duvet/dressing gown day.
My night was OK: awoke for some time pondering some of the issues I raised above re family, but not wasted time.

Hoping Doodle's night one of the better ones.

Good luck with the driving today Sweetpeasue. There's no hurry! 🙂

Wyllow3 like Doodle said, we always stay in a hotel and I alwaws book my children into one when they visit me. Much easier and the grandchildren love it.

Thankyou everyone for encouragement and reassurance.
Doodle I will go and thankyou. Hope you both have a much easier night.
Wyllow Your post 21-37 'There's a time...' reminded me of the biblical words. Ive been in my 'shell' a while. Sons and families staying in Caravan Holiday Park. We've booked caravan of our own so will have some quiet if we need it. Willing to go if can get some 'family' time but think it might be challenging in many ways.
Candy Im sure not having severe pain with bleeding is a good sign. Hope it eases off for you soon. Thankyou for kind words.
Nadateturbe Thankyou for your prayers, sincerely. I'm always interested in what others have to say about certain books too. Such a varied response.

A few years after my husband died I had my husband wedding ring stolen, long with a lot of money and credit cards. It was taken by sineone I was helping at the time and they disappeared, the fact test I was conned was nothing to that ring. I'm so glad you found your necklace Whiff.
To rethink going through a bad depression I do hood things improve. I have been better tge last few weeks, but I feel I'm fighting it a bit now, think it's the holiday period when years ago we were all together as a family, it feels like I was another person then.