Black Dog 20

Damaskrose what a nice post and thank you. You have your own problems I see. I’ve not hear of people with the opposite of SAD but I suppose it’s logical there must be some. How difficult for you. Wishing you and your DH well. You are always welcome to post on this thread.
nadateturbe glad your DH is feeling a bit better. Hope you feel better soon too.
SweetPeasue glad you had a better day and the appointment with the psychologist went well.
HvDY glad your kidney pain has improved. Good luck with the MRI. You and Swetpeasue are very brave I couldn’t go in one.
Had an exhausting and not too pleasant day today. Two hospital appointment in different hospitals. So worn out now.
Not a good meeting with the consultant. Nice chap but risk factors for DH proposed op are very high. Much higher than we thought. Not sure what DH will choose to do as doing nothing brings its own risks but it’s a big worry and vey upsetting.
wyllow sleep well x

Nadateturbe Good news that your husband is a bit better. Sounds like it's taken it's toll on you unfortunately. I am sorry .You must rest and get your strength back and I hope your husband is well enough to help .Thankyou for your kind message and hugs. Sending some back to you.
Doodle I do hope you were both able to sleep better last night. The RBS sounds so horrible. Wow, 20 medications. I see what you mean now about side effects-then of course it's difficult to know if one med is interacting badly with any of the 19 others! It's hard going for you both. Just as you've come to the top of a mountain there's another one-- a good thing we don't know how many there are going to be or we could give up, sit down and say no way. Yes present psychologist is part of NHS mental health team. Urologist NHS appt in June. Same Urologist private appt 22nd March. Absolutely no reason for you to remember with everything you have on your plate. Thankyou for that great hug!
HVDY Thankyou for those words. So glad the kidney pain has gone🤞. Hope the MRI went OK and the results are good. I hate MRIs but I've had quite a few now so not too bad but still hate them. I think you just get into a state of mind where you convince yourself you won't panic. You are right about keeping going for your family though I feel my sons don't need me so much now, whereas my husband definitely does .
Scaredycat How have you been today? I would have loved a daughter to go out with. When I was first pregnant I had a girls name all picked out, then I had a miscarriage and later went on to have 2 lovely sons. I still think of the one I lost and feel sure it was a daughter. What a large family you have-can imagine it would be quite noisy meetups but fun.
* DamaskRose* Beautiful username! Thanks so much for your kind words to us all. Sounds like you've a lot to cope with as it's difficult to have pain yourself and worries about your husband on top.
Everyone's problems are valid and can be hugely draining to that person. The lovely thing about this thread is we are all equal in our different worries. Your worries are certainly not 'nothing'. I do hope your and your DH's health concerns improve.
EllieAnneWhiff**Candy Hope you're all OK.
Wyllow I miss your wise words but appreciate you popping in at the end of the day. Hope things are improving for you.

I've had much better day today painwise Bowel been a problem but that's cos of painkillers yesterday. Good appt with psychologist. DH has still got headaches but has promised to make appt with GP on Monday( and I'll keep him to it).

Wishing you all a v peaceful night and hope its much better for you Doodle
X

Nadateturbe Glad your husband is feeling a bit better. Hope you're not coming down with the same thing. Take it easy. My kidney pain seems to have gone now, fingers crossed. Just off to hospital for an MRI (they check on this Meningioma every year).

DamaskRose Nice of you to post. Like you, I don't enjoy hot weather. Thankfully, we don't get it for long. You and your husband have problems, too - the joys of getting older .

"see" you all later x

I hope you're feeling at least a bit better Sweetpeasue. How is your husband?
My husband a little better, is up showering, good sign. I've not felt great since teatime yesterday. Had breakfast and back in bed. No plans for today apart from making food.
Doodle I hope you both slept last night. It makes such a difference to how you feel.
Scaredycat how nice to have your daughter in the same village. Your family sounds such a happy bunch, just like HVDYs. Its better not to think back too much to what you were once able to do, if you can, at least you're being as active as possible and getting the fresh air.
You're right HVDY about love of family keeping us going and I think seeing your children and being out and about with them and your little gd keeps you cheerful and is good for you. It makes a house feel more like a home, when children are there.
I hope your kidney infection is clearing.
Hello to Wyllow3 Candy EllieAnne and all on BD.
Nice of you to pop in DamaskRose. How unusual to feel better in winter! Do you feel good in summer too?
You sound like you both have your own problems and cope very well. Aging is not for the fainthearted.

I just went to GN Active and this thread was at the top and I couldn’t just ignore it. The only problem I have is reverse SAD so I’m much happier, more motivated, more energised in winter but find the sun, the brightness, the heat difficult in summer. I live in the north east of Scotland so it isn’t all that bad! Physically I have osteoarthritis and a congenital kidney problem, I take daily painkillers and have regular blood tests and might need an op. DH has several health problems and is becoming forgetful and a bit confused.But honestly all this is as nothing compared to you fantastic people. I see your names in other threads and have no idea that your coping with anything much, you’re articulate, clear headed and give no clue that you’re struggling in any way. I admire you all so much for your strength of character and positivity. I wish you all the best and hope, somehow, that things will improve.

I've just got up and seen your lovely messages. I hope you all know how very much it means to me that you are there.
All ,in your individual ways, are so helpful, even if you don't think you are.
Hope your night has been better Doodle. You too Nadateturbe. Thankyou HVDY ,hope your pain has gone completely.
I'll come back later.
Thankyou all and I hope today will have some good moments to help balance any bad ones.xx

SweetpeaSue I'm so sorry and disappointed for you that the appointment wasn't of much use to you. I'm not a believer, but hope and the will to survive/get better for the love of our spouse/family is what keeps us going, I think. Nobody could ever say you were weak - far from it. You're a strong person and have such a lot to contend with. x

Doodle You're another very strong lady. You've been through a lot of health problems yourself, and still manage to care for your husband with his troubles, too. I hope things soon improve for you both.

ScaredyCat A big family! If you're anything like me, you've probably got family photos on show around the house.

Hope ALL BDers have a better day today x

nadateturbe and Wyllow hope you both had a good night.

Dear Sweetpeasue. Seeing how this latest illness has affected my DH (and me because of it) I understand much more how hard things have been for you and your DH. When you love someone you want them to be happy not suffering and when they are in pain mentally or physically it affects both.
I am so disappointed for you that your appointment wasn’t more helpful. Hope is what we all need and when we feel there is nothing left to hope for I can imagine how devastating that can be. I am trying my best to cheer DH and keep him going but your pain has been with you such a long time it’s no wonder the serious impact it’s had on both you and your DH.
Sorry I’ve forgotten, is your current psychologist part of the same team or independent? I hope they can help.
Do you have an appointment with the urologist? Sorry I know I should remember but so many things going on here too.
Sending you the only thing I can offer, a big hug. x

Night night BD's....wish I could say more, warmest thoughts for now. xx

Wasn't intending to post tonight, so sorry for ignoring others. No energy left.
Just wanted to say to Sweetpeasue and Doodle I'm so sorry you are both going through so much. Worrying about yourselves and your dear husbands too. And yet you manage to post caring messages yo others.
And such a disappointing appointment today for you Sweetpeasue.
I could cry for you.
I hope you both get some rest tonight Doodle, and I hope your pain eases Sweetpeasue.
I don't understand the suffering either, I just cling to my belief in God and hope but it's hard when you're going through so much.

Praying for you and sending much love and hugs.

Doodle My heart goes out to you and your DH.
It's not long since you both had your last holiday and everything seems to have gone downhill. I'm praying and hoping things will be resolved with your DH's latest setback , I really am.
You are always so supportive of everyone here and you are an amazing lady. I know you will be exhausted and I don't know how you keep going. And yet ,I do. It's love for your DH and that precious thing , hope. We mustn't abandon it when times are bad and I so admire your resilience. My DH's health has been affected , mentally too, because of me. I feel bad about it and I'm being v open tonight as I'm at end of tether.
Sure others reading this will think I'm weak or anything else they wish to throw at me.
I understand it affects both people when you love each other, physically and mentally.
Don't mean to say that I claim to know your own individual situation, which would be presuptious, just can imagine the emotional impact of it all.

Suffering is something I don't claim to understand from a religious perspective.
Yet I can't believe it's all for nothing.

So hope you both have a restful night tonight. And thankyou for keeping this place going for myself and others.
Love x

Don't think I should be posting
Really despairing today.
Pain worse it's been -taken 8 co-codamol and oramorph in last 24hrs.
Got out doped up for early appt. 6 weeks ago PM Dr in initial appt I told her everything .She said she worked with her 'team' but I hadn't realise till today she'd not passed on the info. Last week physio said this appt was with him and pain psychologist to devise a plan. After telling them everything they seemed shocked and said they hadn't my notes.Why hadn't Dr let her team see my notes? They didn't realise the extent of toll taken on mental health.
I'm to get appt in about 6mths as I need to continue with present psychologist. They think I need to see Urologist about bladder first . I can't understand it all.
DH thought they looked shocked.
Asked them how many IC patients physio had seen. In the many yrs he'd been there he'd seen 1!

See 'my' psychologist tomorrow, thank goodness but no one can do anything.

Sorry this is all about me. Its been a terrible day, where hope is disappearing.

I'm so sorry for those in pain. Physical or mental. They go together anyway.Dont think can have one without other.
Wishing all a peaceful night.

HVDY- between us we have 5 children ,11 grandchildren ( inc 2 stepGC) ranging from 37 to 15 and 4 GGC from 10 to 16 months. Always someone’s birthday!!!
Chubby Chops sounds such a lovely little baby - it’s great when they enjoy their food isn’t it.
I did a bit of shopping and then we had a walk this afternoon. I was such a fast walker once but it won’t be long before snails whizz past me😩
Doodle- my Sister has a spreadsheet too!! Her DH sorted it for her. I use my phone alarm to remind me.
I can’t imagine how difficult RBS must be to deal with. No wonder sleep doesn’t come easily for your DH. Hope you get a better night tonight.
Yes it’s lovely when there are 4 generations of us together at the same time- bit noisy though!!
Take care allxxx

HVDY what a lovely day with the little one. I bet she’s such fun now she’s taking more interest.
Like the sound of the new bedding. I bought a duck egg blue set recently with pink birds on it.
Scaredycat DH has always been very organised and methodical. He has a spreadsheet detailing all his meds and when to take them and he just ticks it off as he goes.
Yes RLS is the most common form but restless body syndrome affects many too. Yes our DIL is feeling better thanks.
Unfortunately last night wasn’t a good one. We were both awake till gone 3 so very tired today.
You sound so young and sprightly it’s hard to imagine you with a GD of 37. How lovely to see them all grow up and with families of their own.
nadateturbe do hope your DH improves soon. Have you had a better day today?
Sweetpeasue hopjng your meeting went well and you got on ok.
Wyllow thinking of you. Hugs xy

ScaredyCat Your eldest GD is 37? We had a lovely day with baby, thanks. Did the usual - playing, singing, etc., went to a local garden centre where they've got farm animals (she wasn't very interested). She sits up well now (7 months) and loves her grub! Aqua was good yesterday. I need to go more often. How's your day been?

How has everyone been today? x

Hello all
Doodle- I,m glad your cough is improving - hope DH is too.
What a lot of meds he has to take - does he use an alarm to remind him when to take them?
I didn’t realise RLS affected other parts of the body too- it must be horrendous. Hope last night was more comfortable for you both.
Hope your DiL is improving now.
Whiff- I hope you have been able to go somewhere that you love today and the weather was kind to you too. Your DH would be so proud of you . Your posts inspire us all thank you.
Nadateturbe- hope the antibiotics soon start to work for your DH- it’s a lovely feeling getting into fresh sheets isn’t it - he’ll appreciate that today.
Don’t do too much though
Yes I feel very lucky to have DD in the same village we live - as you say much more relaxing and companiable.
SweetPeaSue- glad you had a beach walk on Saturday- is the coffee shop by the sea?
Oh dear that was a pickle for your Aunt- good job the fire went out. I expect she got over it quicker than you did!!
It’s a good job your PM meeting is today- the amount of pain you suffer is not acceptable . I hope you feel more hopeful afterwards.
HVDY- how did you feel after Aqua Aerobics? Glad you got there . I love to look at new bedding - in M and S the other day I saw duvet and pillowcases in cream coloured fleece - it looked so cosy.
Hope your day with ChubbyChops is going well. These times are so precious as they grow up so fast. Our eldest GD is 37 but the memories of those days are still so vivid.
Candy- hope you had a good weekend and had some time for yourself.
EllieAnne- how did your weekend go?
Wyllow- thinking of you as always

Love to all old and new and just reading.

SweetpeaSue What a shock for your auntie. It's a good job you were on hand. I hope the PM meeting goes well. You really shouldn't have to suffer like this.

Whiff Hope you can go somewhere nice today. After all these years, the grief is still there. Your husband must have been wonderful. You cope with all your health problems so well.

Doodle My new bedding is dusky pink/white swirl patterned (Asda). I'm glad your cough is improving. Drink plenty.

nadateturbe Hope your husband soon feels better. Try to rest when you can.

Hope ALL BDers have a decent day. Going to pick up Chubby Chops at 10 x

Night night all xx

Reading backwards.. ..
I see you got out for a walk on Sunday Sweetpeasue. And a coffee. So good to hear. And what a todo with your aunt. I'm glad you managed to calm her.
Candy I hope your day has been ok and you aren't too tired. It's difficult deciding when to leave work and if you would manage financially.
I hope you manage to come to a decision you're happy with, that allows you some time to relax and do things you enjoy.
Whiff I agree crafts are good for mental health. They help you to relax. Will be thinking about you tomorrow. 💐

Sorry for short comments. I have read all the posts, but I'm really exhausted, poor husband is still in bed.
Sorry if I've ignored anyone.
Love to all.xx

Scaredycat how lovely to have a daughter close enough to meet for a coffee and walk.. That is what I miss. So much more relaxed than a lengthy visit.

HVDY I'm glad you're getting out again. I'm quite exhausted reading your post. 😁.
But it sounds like you've had a lovely two days.
I managed to wash and tumble dry new bedding for my husband to freshen his bed as he's been in it since Thursday. But I'm afraid I didn't get as far as putting it on the bed! Tomorrow...

Doodle I'm glad the cough is a little better. I'm sorry your husband is still suffering with the RLS. It must really disrupt his much needed sleep.
I do hope you get out for a walk soon. Fresh air might help your cough.

Whiff I hope you get through tomorrow OK. You are, as Sweetpeasue says inspirational.
Sweetpeasue such a lot of painkillers to take and still in terrible pain. I hope you get help with it tomorrow.

HVDY coughs definitely better thanks. Still cough if I talk a lot but otherwise not.
Glad you enjoyed aqua aerobics and lunch. What colour is your new bedding. Lovely roast dinner I’m envious.
nadaterurbe hope the antibiotics help your DH to feel better soon.
Sweetpeasue it’s so hard with DH . He’s on 20 plus
medications so anything new could have a reaction with so many things. If difficult to know what to do for the best.
Oh your poor aunt. Thank goodness you were able to go and help her. What a shock.
Do hope your meeting with the PM is good and helps. I don’t know how you keep going with all that pain. Do hope they can help you.
Whiff good idea to go out. Have you somewhere nice in mind. 20 years is a long time but you obviously miss him just as much as in the early years.
DH was on Clonazepam for a while to help him sleep though not for the RLS. He had to come off it as it was making him very dizzy. Thanks for the suggestion though.
Don’t know how you cope with your pain either but you do try and seem to get as much as you can from life.
Wyllow x