Black dog 21

Wyllow I'm glad you can say as much as you do as it must be so very hard for you.
I too had nowhere else to go when I discovered BD. I had never been and still aren't on any other social media .

I know we are all relieved you keep posting as we care about you. These are only words from friends you've never met, but I trusted them too , and have felt better knowing they are here.

Not a great night for me tonight but I came on here and I understand there are others (you Wyllow) who are in need and I care.xx

Bump

Yes Wyllow this is a very special place.
Hope you can sleep peacefully at least.x

Woken up and feeling like a panic attack. I’m so frightened yet have to keep going. Got the shakes. Take care all x

I typed a long and detailed post at about 6pm, thought I'd sent it but obviously couldn't have done!
Doodle. I hope your DH soon picks up and that you can both go home x
SweetpeaSue Could you grow something up the fencing?
Ellie Anne Glad your cat is now improving. Hope your daughter gets in touch soon.
Whiff Hope you're having a good holiday
Wyllow3 Nice to see you still posting. Koko. We all want you to get better.
Candy, ScaredyCat, Candy6 and ALL BDers...... Hope you're all OK. It's been 24 degrees here. We like the place. Went on a steam train to Holt yesterday, did far more walking then we ever do (a lot for us). Going to Cromer today. Love to all x

Doodle I wish I could be there to hug you. I'm sure we all do. I hope your children manage to keep you company sometimes.

Doodle Had wakeful night and strangely was awake at that time. Wish I'd gone on my phone I could have talked to you. You were so alone and frightened - attacks like that are so scary.
What you are going through is really taking its toll on your body . I hope it doesn't sound glib to ask if you know any breathing exercises to steady breathing. I was once told by an ambulance medic to take a pause before I breathed out of about 5seconds . I admit ,it's useless if it's really bad or for bad pain.
I wish they could send your DH home and it must be heartbreaking for you to hear him and see him so poorly. We keep up prayers and love and hope that he will turn a corner and start to rapidly pick up.
You are doing all you can by being there with him and more than some are able to do . Just sending love and a warm hug 🫂. Hope things are better today.❤️

HVDY Glad you're enjoying your holiday. Weather is extreme isn't it - minute we complain of wet miserable days the temp shoots up into the 20s!
Hope your legs are holding up- well done the walking.
Fencing is big issue I'm afraid. We put up a high one on our side next to a neighbour's 3ft one long ago. Present neighbour wanted take it down and put up his own-so * his* fence now (they're responsible in deeds). We'll need to put up a separate trellis next to his and yes intend to grow climbers again. Meanwhile our neighbour other side changing things there and we've decided to renew our old fence that side so men coming next Tuesday! Just need privacy.

Hope everyone has a decent day and all those with pain and other worries have a better one. .

Borrowed these words from another thread .

'Sometimes' said the horse.

'Sometimes?' asked the boy.

'Sometimes, just getting up and carrying on is brave and magnificent' .

Candy it's great you're not working and can have a nap when you want to. I get what you're saying about routine. When you don't have to do something like go to work, you can end up sitting around doing nothing. I often have to push myself.
EllieAnne I'm glad your GD has an appointment. Bullying must be horrible to cope with. Corrie has done a storyline recently. I didn't realise how bad it could be. Do children not understand how much we worry. I hope you hear from her soon.
Your DH sounds very self sufficient, mine is like that. It has it's good and bad points. Apart from music days he just repeats the pattern. But we do puzzles and crossword from the I and the radio times together with morning tea. Could you not get your husband to share something like this. Maybe join him in Tipping Point and answer the questions. I love TP.
I hope you're not overdoing it - weeding after that long walk.

Just read your cat is eating a bit, great news.

Scaredycat my eyes are a little better thanks. I think my neck arthritis has been triggered by the awkward position for the eye test which didn't help. Had 2 really bad nights with pains everywhere. Just have to give it time to settle.
It's really sad watching your friend. You're doing the best you can by keeping her company. But it's heartbreaking to watch someone changing and losing them gradually. It does actually make you cry.. Life is hard sometimes.

Sweetpeasue So many kind posts to everyone, which I will read soon.
Your book kept me company last night. Very unusual style of writing. I'm finding it fascinating. Talk soon.x

Scaredycat It is extremely sad to lose someone slowly with any kind of dementia. They can be 'there' then suddenly not and for the person to be a much loved and long standing friend it must be really sad. You are such a cheery person with everyone here and I'm sure you are making your friend so much happier 'in the moment' than if you were not there.
I'm being 'Barbara' today again-in fact think I'm turning into her and am so grateful for a good day physically.
Nadateturbe Oh I'm so pleased you're reading my book choice (I'm halfway through) but always get worried that people in book group won't like my choice if it's picked. Hope you don't get bored with it. The film of it is beautiful with great acting and scenery though this is first time I've actually read this book of hers. It's not for everyone but it's a gentle read . Do hope your eyes are a little better and the pain you have been getting in your back. Don't feel you have to post or reply ,I know the screen is troublesome for you.

Sweetpeasue
It must be very odd looking out at your bare garden. All your colourful plants gone. You sounded quite sad. The fence issue sounds a real nuisance too. But you seem to have a handle on it. I would take my time and plan what you want to plant.
You sound like you're coping well with it in spite of your pain problems. It's annoying when you don't sleep, it doesn't help your health at all.
You describe the emotional effects of continual pain so well. I totally empathise. I sat crying saying to my husband My life is just hell. Then you feel better and become hopeful again. Although I don't know about you, but I'm actually a bit anxious now, wondering what pain I will have next. But as everyone says you just KOKO. And be thankful.
My eyes, fingers crossed, feel a little better. Arthritis has flared up because of awkward sitting position in eye test.
Enough moaning 😁
I do a lot of the breathing technique that you recommended to Doodle. It helps anxiety and palpitations.
(Scaredycat I don't know how you cope so well with your permanent AF.. I think you're amazing.)
I hope your psychiatrist appointment was helpful on Tuesday, even though it was an emotional session.
You are so right, the worries we have often just change when our children are adults. You never stop being a parent.
I hope you're feeling ok today.
Thanks for your understanding. And the book. I wonder what you think of it.

Physio appt this morning. Started for knees now back ones. Had done some standing ones given few weeks ago (I did tell her may have been spoilt by gardening) now wants me to do F2F with someone weekly with bouncy ball thing. Not happy with it , I nearly fell off and back went into spasm because of sitting. Back pain started after that botched Hysteroscopy and sitting always hurts after a little while. I don't believe sitting on that ball will help and will be detrimental. Can't see why can't stay with back ones already have. Sort of pressured into 4 weekly sessions which I don't think I can commit to as pain unpredictable and have enough on .
Committed to group sessions for MH group and so worried about it now.

Nadateturbe I watched the film first and it was so colourful I suggested the book. First introduced to' Elizabeth and her German Garden ' one summer yrs ago after DH built our little patio and my solanum had flowered above me while sat out in chair alone. DH was at work and was gorgeous sunny day. One of those memories that felt like I was in heaven. Colours of the flowers in the book were described in such a beautiful way ,so I guess that's made a difference to how I 'see' her writing iyswim.

Hope everyone OK and had a reasonable day.

Doodle I wasn't sure where to post about my aunt's experience of caring for her DH at home. I hope I did right posting where I did.

You feel as if you're a close friend, a valuable one who has cared for myself and others here.
Hope you can get things sorted and your DH gets the right care for you both.
Just look after yourself and DH and that's all that matters.
Sending another huge hug and prayers.x


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Sweetpeasue I can understand your reluctance to do the ball exercises. You know your own body. My physio always told me not to do anything I wasn't comfortable with. I don't know enough to comment on yours. But I wish I had spoken up about how uncomfortable I was at my eye test and will do so next time. You don't have to refuse to do any exercise, just ask for what you know you can handle. That would be my advice anyway. Oh and I've ordered the film.
Sometimes, just getting up and carrying on is brave and magnificent'. Very true.
I hope you sleep better tonight after all your fresh air and work in the garden.

Wyllow3 I think you are doing so well, collecting the sweater and posting here.
Sorry you're feeling so ill today. Maybe tomorrow will be a little better for you. And you get some fresh air. x

Doodle sending you love and praying so much for better days for you and your DH. Take care of yourself and your husband. That's your priority. Hugs.xx

Doodle I've just read your other thread about palliative care. I can't offer any advice but I hope and pray you get your dear husband home soon, where you both want to be, with the care he needs. Praying for strength for you too. Sending warm hugs and love.

Just lost a long post. I'm really sorry I'd actually written stuff...
followed your days and yes I've got the book the horse and the boy.

Doodle I have read the other thread and you are having to do this enormous brave and loving arranging and we can follow you on both threads.

I need to see docs and dentist and neglecting myself a lot -the weight before I say, Wyllow, just walk round the block...my MH worker said I need to get carer involved but its like I self punish.

so love to you all...holidays, gardens, poorly eyes, supporting friends and family and loved pets xxx

The night before not the weight before!

Doodle I do hope you get some good news about your husband, soon. It must be so miserable for you both at the moment. Are your sons/family visiting? I hope you have some periods of respite.

SweetpeaSue I can understand your anxiety about the MH group sessions, but you never know, they might help. If you feel uncomfortable in any way when you're there, simply stand up and walk out. You don't owe anyone any explanation. I tried the ball exercises, after my stroke - I didn't like it and didn't continue (many movements make me very dizzy). You could perhaps look up exercises on YouTube and find your own.

nadateturbe I hope you're having a better day today. How are your eyes?

ScaredyCat Dementia is terrible. The person becomes almost a stranger. All you can do is perhaps talk about things the person can remember - school days, holidays, old tv shows, etc. We have to do that with my SIL.

Wyllow3 It may not be applicable to you, so apologies if I'm speaking out of turn, but my neighbour across the road (she's 70, very fit and active) has bipolar. A few years ago, she was so ill, she didn't leave her bedroom for 9 months, didn't shower or dress, and was eventually sectioned. Her meds were changed and she recovered. The MH nurses used to come and take her for a walk around the block, every day, for weeks. Now, she goes all over the place! She's in Whitby today, goes away next week somewhere. She's been (alone) to see her daughter in Dubai several times! You CAN get better, and we on here all want you to do so. x

It's a glorious day again, and we're on our way home (should be an hour). Son2, DIL and baby have all had a stomach bug (not the daughter though), so we'll see if they need anything. We watched my nephew's funeral on a livestream thing on Thursday - non-religious, all about him, and with songs he liked playing. About 60 people attended.

Hope ALL BDers have seen some sunshine today x

HVDY have you had a good time? Hope family is recovering well (poor chubby chops) and you don't get the bug.
Very encouraging post to Wyllow3. Your neighbour made a fantastic recovery.
I'm feeling much better today, back pain still there but not as bad, eyes improving and made it to the caravan for 2 nights. But I'm almost afraid to say it out loud in case it gets worse again, sounds crazy I know.

Can’t post love to all x