Black dog 21

HVDY a long wait but good news, glad nothing sinister is happening. Hope you start to feel better soon. I’ve had a washed out sort of day. Nothing in particular but I feel cold, tired and listless. Cough is still better though and at last I’ve done the ironing 🤣
Sweetpeasue could you and DH go and stay at the venue the night before but just have some quiet time together. Take your time getting ready in the morning and make a slow approach to the big day?
You could try on the fascinators and get DH to take photos. That’s what I did with mine till I found one I liked but you don’t have to wear one it’s totally up to you.
notoveryet you sound like someone whose troubles and worries have piled up around you. We all feel like that at times. So sorry you’ve lost your husband
Hard to cope with things without the loving support. Maybe the house does need things doing but looking after yourself comes first. Do small jobs one at a time and try not to look at it overall. .
So sorry about your granddaughter. Does she have anyone looking after her.? Mental health issues are so hard to cope with. We all want to help but never know exactly what’s going on in someone’s mind. Is your DGD under the care of the MHT?
I hope you find your bereavement group comforting. Sometimes talking about things with others who’ve known the same loss helps.
You are always welcome to pop in here for a chat. It may seem we all know each other but that doesn’t matter all are welcome.
Hope to see you post again.
nadsteturbe hope the day has been restful for you.

Just back from DH's long-awaited hospital appointment. 45 minutes to see the doctor (running late) then 50 minutes to wait for a blood test. DH will have to wait to get a letter for a follow-up appointment - either way, he hasn't got anything serious. Hope ALL BDers manage to have a decent day x

Good morning everyone. Have read all your posts and will come back later.
Hello notoveryet. Sorry you're having such a bad time. 💐

notoveryet Welcome. We all try to support each other on here, so please post when you want to. I'm sorry to hear about your granddaughter. Is she getting help with her problems? I think we all have the "what ifs", so will know what you mean. Have you got family nearby? Friends? I hope you find understanding at the bereavement group.

Just came across you all after my usual wake up time of 3.30am. You seem kind and I'm needing some kindness. I have a severely mentally ill granddaughter who has cut herself off from the family, my grieving for my dh who died 5 years ago seems to get worse. My house needs a huge amount done to it and I can't afford any of it. My what iffery is rather over the top. I look at my dogs sleeping happily by my side and am thankful for their presence. I do hope today goes well for you all and maybe in time I'll get to know you all. Today I'll be going to my bereavement group lunch and will appear to be one of life's copers but deep inside I'm really not!

Night night BD's xx
(No, not getting enough help, but that's so true for many of us)

SweetpeaSue I think I do need antibiotics or perhaps steroids. The trouble is trying to get through to someone. I've done almost nothing today . When are you seeing the Urologist?

Whiff That's excellent news about your brother. I think people recover better at home in their own surroundings and with their loved ones around.

Doodle Glad that you had a more normal time and chatted about things other than medical stuff. If your husband is feeling pain, that's surely a sign that the nerves are still working, which must be good. I'm not ringing the GP tomorrow - not enough time as I need to get ready to accompany DH to his hospital appointment (to see an Endocrinologist, he's been waiting months).

Hope ALL BDers have a restful sleep. I'm so tired so am off to bed x

EllieAnne I could relate to your anxiety at the time and how I worry about what I look like and I am anxious in social situations. I think the anxiety about what might be usually outweighs the actual event in many cases. I'm glad it went OK for you in the end. Thankyou for that reassurance.
Doodle Wedding not until very end of May. Everyone going out night before (men and women separately) so I'd rather miss going night before anyway. Staying night of wedding and it's a nice venue but I'm just so out of touch with social events like this, I expect many of us might be. I've seen some v nice Fascinators , tiny ones , it's just hard to imagine my own face under one!😂 Thankyou for your good wishes. Oh your poor husband .I see what you mean about the nerves doing their job but , yes, not great to be on the receiving end when they spark off pain. Hope you both have a quiet night tonight.
Wyllow Hope you are coping and still getting adequate MH help.

Goodnight all BDs and wishing all a restful night.

Ellie Anne not to worry. I miss loads on here it’s hard to keep up with everything.
Sorry it’s not an interesting novel but it’s a book called God on mute about the silence of unanswered prayer. I am finding it helpful and only heard about it as the church lent course is based on it. Decided to get a copy and mentioned it on the thread then Sweetpease said she’d bought a copy and now nadateturbe . I’m finding it’s giving me different ways of looking at things. I will read it more than once because if forget to much of it. Not sure what the others will think of it but I’m glad I’ve got it.
Glad the wedding went well. Sometimes what we dread isn’t as bad as we fear.

Doodle I have missed post about the book. What is it?
Sweet pea sue well done for remembering all my worries about the wedding.
In the end it went fine but was a very small affair and to be honest I was relieved when it was over.
But a lot of my stress was because of my problems with dh.
I’m sure everything will be fine on the day.

HVDY thank you, we had a good day. Neighbour came for a good chat about anything and everything other than health and hospitals. Felt so nice to have a ‘normal’ afternoon.
To be honest I haven’t bought cough medicine for over 20 years but the last time I had this cough nothing seemed to soothe it. I find the benylin calms it for a while. I only take about one dose a day.
Shame you didn’t get an appointment. Will you try again in the morning?
nadateturbe nice to just have a browse sometimes. Yes men don’t like shopping dot they, unless it for something technical.
Not heard of those jeans will look them up.
Hope you find the book interesting. There’s lots I relate to and things where I think I hadn’t thought of that. I think it’s a book I will have to go over and over as I keep forgetting what I’ve read. Our local church is doing its lent course based on this book. I can’t go because of DH but I thought I’d like to read it anyway. Let me know what you think.
Sweetpeasue I hate it when the screens do something unexpected and you can’t get them back.
Sorry I’ve missed what you are doing about the wedding. Glad your son has been understanding.
Good your son is taking your GS leaving you one less worry. Is it possible for you to go the day before too and stay somewhere where you don’t have the journey to worry about. I know it’s not far but would it help? I hope and pray that it will be an enjoyable day for you. When is it?
Hope the urologist is more help this time.
I think you’re right about the dressing change irritating the nerves in DHs foot. It happens every time. Mind you they say it’s a good thing he feels pain (not sure he feels the same about that 🤣)
I wore a flower (one) in my hair for son 1 wedding. MOB wore a wonderful mocha brown hat with flowers but I was fine with my single flower, For son 2 I did buy a fascinator but it was tiny, delicate (more like a small spray on one side) I don’t think so many people bother now. You’ll be fine without
Scaredycat I’m so thrilled for you. Hope you all have a wonderful time.
Whiff that is good news. Thanks for letting us know. He will recover much better at home.
Wyllow sleep well and build strength.
Take care all. Hope a peaceful night for everyone*

HVDY You've had a rotten night. Your cough sounds as if you need something ,perhaps antibiotics? So sorry you didn't get an appt. I kwym about cough mixtures. We've tried all sorts in the past -cough lozenges- yet nothing seems to really help. Hope it's not a chest infection. Take care of yourself and rest if you need to- boring as it is, I know.

Whiff That's wonderful news. I'm glad your mind is at rest now. Thankyou for letting us know. 🙂

Just heard from my sister in law they have picked my brother up from the hospital and on their way home. I am so relieved as I was worried about him . But know he will make a good recovery at home. Thank you for your good wishes.

SweetpeaSue I was awake every hour, didn't manage to get an appointment or a call back. Sorry you've had to miss your book club again. Don't worry about wearing a hat or not - I've never worn one in my life. It doesn't matter what the other mum is doing. Wear whatever you'll feel comfortable and happy with. It's rained all day here.

Sorry Fascinator Head so fuzzy.

HVDY You had a late bedtime so I hope you got some sleep and relief from cough. Did you get an appt this morning? My son texted that GS has had a cough for a few dys now. Must be going around.
Doped up today because of bladder pain so will miss book group for second week running.
No outfit as yet. Not used to 'dressing up'.
Think I'm feeling how 'EllieAnne* felt about the whole thing. I know other mum is wearing fascinated. I have awful hair and don't suit hats. Never wore any headgear for son1's wedding. I feel panicky every time I think about it.

Grey day and fog and drizzle here. Hope its brighter wherever you all are.
Scaredycat Hope you have lovely weather and are getting settled in now.

Doodle Hope you and your husband didn't get very wet. How was the podiatry appointment? I'm not very keen on cough medicines (I don't think they do much) but I might ring the GP in the morning (and join the queue).

SweetpeaSue That's a sensible arrangement. Have you got an outfit yet?

ScaredyCat Enjoy your lovely family time on holiday.

Wyllow3 Hope you're getting better, day by day.

Hope ALL BDers have a restful night. I'm stopping up late (late for me) x

All the best, fellow strugglers xx

Sweetpeasue that was a better arrangement. Takes the pressure off you and husband. xx

Goodnight everyone, hope its a peaceful one.xx

Nadateturbe My post wasn't clear. GS was being dropped off at our house day of wedding. We were meant to be doing the journey to venue. The others are all going day before. I know I could be in bad way to look after GS on morning so new arrangement -son will take his son with him day before. I can be in v bad way on mornings so didn't want risk upsetting GS. It's a while yet but things aren't going well lately. See Urologist Friday though expectations are low.
Wyllow Hope you are taking care of yourself.

Peaceful night to all BDs.

Doodle hope you are both OK, the rain timed itself well. Hope you weren't soaked.
I've started the book too.
Sweetpeasue Glad the bladder pain has eased, even a little bit is welcome. An hour and a half is a long drive. What have you decided?
Scaredycat how lovely! Enjoy the 🌞 and company. "See" you next weekend.

Hi all . Just read all your posts and just want to send much love to everyone of you. This is a special holiday for us as we are with our daughter and husband..I was scared to say before in case I jinxed it. So lovely to,spend this time with them and I feel very blessed. We are not in UK so enjoying the warmth of the Sun. Please take care all and will be back at the end of next weekxxxxxx

I've got it back! Grrr. It had reverted to something called Desktop mode. Pressed something at v top of phone and back to normal. Don't understand half of what my phone does.🤦

Nadateturbe So very sorry about your sister dying so young. 60 yrs is no age .
You must have very fond memories of you all having fun together. I'm 1 of 3 sisters.
What a long way to go for your x-ray. Yes, I understand most x-rays at our age show up arthritis anyway . Dr's can be too quick to put things down to that I think. Hope your back pain isn't too bad after the long drive -it can exacerbate it.
Doodle Hoping you had a better night last night. How typical of the rain-- it must wait until you get that wheelchair out and think right-lets have fun with this lady- see how much more she can take!!
Thankyou ,my bladder pain has eased since this morning though still got the same heavy ache which seems to persist. I've been worrying terribly about getting to son's wedding .It's 1 and half hr drive on the morning and when I have pain bad it's often mornings. Everyone else going day before and I'd agreed to take GS too. No sleep through worry. Went to son's this morning so doped up in pain and we told him --he was absolutely fine-but I still feel awful about it. Can't be helped.
Hope you are both OK and your DH's foot isn't as painful. It must be changing the dressing that disturbs the nerves. Thinking about you.

HVDY oh your poor friend. Honestly when I hear what other people have coped with, it makes me realise I've been very lucky. We got washing dried outside too.
Didn't buy anything Doodle. But saw some lovely clothes. Lots of high end stuff in the shops. I liked Robell denim jeans. I think a trip without husband maybe when I can take more time. Although I have a limit on what I will pay.
How is everyone tonight?