Black dog 21

Doodle I keep thinking about you but I really don't know what to say-Im lost for words. I agree with everything other BDs have said ,in that you are such a caring , amazing lady to spare time for others. I'm just so very sorry. Its good to know you have found some comfort in your church and your family. Whiff has indeed been helpful and kind . Please look after yourself and remember to eat a little. So lovely of your DGS to make you a chocolate brownie-- it's the smaller things that often count so much more than larger ones isn't it. Sending you so much love and wishing I could do more. 💐
Scaredycat What lovely words to Doodle. You have had so much sadness yourself. Yes, aspirin is really not good for the stomach. I'm worried his headache is Temporal Arteritis where the head arteries are inflamed and can cause blindness or stroke. Unfortunately , consultant appt not till beg of July so thought aspirin may thin the blood to get through easier.
Nadateturbe So sorry you have worries about your son. Its the worst thing to feel heartache for your AC and I hope things can be sorted and you'll feel easier soon.x
Wyllow I hope you can get more help organised soon and the worker you saw could help. I can understand your physical health will have suffered and I hope you get to see your Dr soon. x

Sorry I can't write more individually.
I'm completely panicking , not sleeping getting more pain, because of wedding and poor DH. I've still not been able to face hairdressers and haven't got anything suitable for wedding- nothing. I hoped to lose weight so put off looking now frantic- it's next Friday!
DH's GP doesn't believe headache is Temporal Arteritis(which is difficult to diagnose even by Rheumatologist) .DH looked online records and he'd put that DH doesn't have vision probs but he has been having them and we told him. We'll just have to wait 6 weeks for July appt. Son seems distant too-ah well. DH and I will just need to look after each other.

Night all and hope all BDs have a peaceful one.x

nadaterturbe I have a condition which means I cannot picture things in my mind. My memory has always been bad.
So sorry to hear of your concerns about one of your children. I understand that. It’s hard to think of anything else when we worry about them. Hope things work out ok.
HVdY you should be ok in the floods then. 11 months old. Amazing it seems like yesterday she was born. Is she anywhere near walking yet? I seem to remember you had an MRI not long ago. You are very brave.
Your meal sounds nice. I love a roast Turkey dinner.
Wyllow pleased to see you are posting a little more. Do you get on with this fortnightly worker? Is she/he of any help?
Ellie Anne I feel lonely now too. DH was my constant pal. We did everything together and now I feel adrift. The days are so long I don’t know what to do with myself. I am looking into an art course run weekly. I have no artistic talent but need some company. I did a short walk today too.
Thank you Scaredycat I need to get back to doing normal things. Life has been so strange for the last few months. No set pattern no routine. I’ve never watched daytime TV and music often makes me sad so no idea what to do to fill the void or break the silence. Hope you have a good time at the family birthday meal.
Sweetpeasue DH was on aspirin for years, does your DH take dispersible (can’t spell it) one’s. Hope it helps him.
How have you been today?

I've been feeding a little stray cat for some weeks - he/she turns up at different times of the day, sometimes not at all - and has just been (twice today), so I put the bowl of food just inside the door, and it came in. It might, one day, move in . Much to my husband's disapproval .

Wyllow3 I hope the MH worker manages to sort out some extra help, by way of agency workers.

EllieAnne What beautiful scenery. You're lucky to live somewhere like that, to go for walks - we're on a housing estate but have at least got several lovely parks (only 1 within walking distance) in Nottingham. It poured with rain here yesterday, too. It's cold and very windy today. How's your cat now?

ScaredyCat Your photography group sounds friendly and enjoyable, that's the main thing. Yes, I'm relieved about the brain thing. Hope you have alovely meal tonight. It's so nice to go out and see the family, isn't it?

Doodle Despite all you've been through, and all you're having to cope with at the moment, you always think of us on here. You're a lovely lady x

It was a roast turkey dinner at the day centre, then raspberry cheesecake. I had a medication review by the GP, he wants me to take a BP tablet (something I'm reluctant to do, but suppose I'll have to), as my BP averages at 141/82. (nowadays, the NHS wants everyone's to be 120/80. We'll see........

SweetpeaSue, Candy6, Nadateturbe, Whiff and ALL BDers - hope your day has been ok. x

Doodle- It will be helping your sons too to be able to lighten your load- your DH would be so proud of them. What a dear your GS must be to make you a Cookie- I hope you ate it.
Ah shedding tears is the most natural thing to do and so much better than bottling it up. Lighting a candle in Church for those I,ve lost is something I do everywhere we go- it always brings comfort.
Shock will have made your memory worse- try not to panic everything takes time when you are grieving as you are.
Thank you for your posts - you are very much on all our minds
And it is so kind to take the time for us.
Sending lovex
HVDY- I belong to an interest group in U3A - not a proper photography club. It’s not technical but it’s fun . Each month we chose 3 subjects and then meet up to look at all our photos on a smart tv.
Glad Chubby Chops is better now and also glad to hear that your MRI results were good. It must be such a relief every time.
Hope it’s a dry day for you today so you can get out and about.
Nadateturbe- I,m sorry you have a nagging worry . Anything upsetting to do with our children , however old they are, clouds every moment doesn’t it.
Take care of yourself and I hope whatever the problem is it can be resolved.
SweetPeaSue- oh dear we,re not clever!! We had to have some trees removed so had a little rockery put in their place. Some young gardners did it for us. I,m doing my best not to kill the new plants!! We haven’t got violas and I,m not very good at plant names but the bees seem to like them!!
It was sensible to stay in if the weather was dangerous- I drove home from Photography on the motorway in very heavy rain and it wasn’t fun.
I hope the aspirin helps your DH but I think I remember reading somewhere it’s not a good thing to take for too long as it’s not good for gastrointestinal health.
Hope you have a pain free day todayx
Wyllow- I hope you were able to sort out something with your worker yesterday. Your mind was probably racing with things that you would appreciate help,with.
I don’t suppose it feels like it but you are doing so well with posting and “chatting “ here. We are so glad you are with us and hoping the better days are not so far awayxx
EllieAnne- what beautiful countryside you have to walk in - the photos were lovely.
Your day sounds like it will be interesting. Finding a good book, beach walk ,coffee and a read.
How is your little cat?

Yesterday I was so tired it scared me a bit but I,m ok this morning. I know I have overdone it this week but I like being busy if possible. Growing old is definitely not for cissies😩
We have a family birthday meal tonight so better rest up a bit.
Candy,Whiff, Allsorts ,Nanny, and everyone hope today has some bright moments for you allxx

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It poured all day yesterday and today doesn’t look much better but I will have a short walk at least.
I’ve had a very lonely week. Some of the activities I’m involved with have stopped for the summer and im going down. I have friends I could visit but they have problems and my reserves for supporting them are low.
If I lived alone today would be a stay in bed day but not possible so will go to the library and walk on the beach.
Maybe have a coffee in morrisons and read my book.
I'm going to try to post pictures from Tuesday s walk.
.

My worker came, she isn't the new one she is the fortnightly regular one but we were trying to sort out agency stuff also help to get a doc appointment, for stuff thats built up and neglected. In process but will take time. It wasn't for going out today but phone waiting.

HVDY glad the Meningioma has not grown.

Wave Sweetpeasue yes it was not going out weather.

nadateturbe supportive thoughts for your worries. And the reassurance can just say what am able.

Wave to Whiff for kind thoughts.

Aw Doodle of course you feel all those things. It's so understandable after what you've been through and suddenly happening now. Keep posting and sharing.

Night night for all BD's.

SweetpeaSue Yes, I have an MRI yearly. It's a Petrous ridge Meningioma.

SweetpeaSue It's worth your husband trying aspirin, and I hope it will have some effect. It's poured with rain all day here, apart from 1 hour earlier. We live on a hill, and the house is high up from the street, too, but it must be terrible for anyone whose home gets flooded.

Doodle I'm so glad your family are looking after you. How lovely of your grandson to make you a cake. Chubby Chops is 11 months now.

nadateturbe I hope the worries you've got are something that can be resolved.

I hope ALL BDers manage to have a decent night's sleep x

Scaredycat the photography group sounds really interesting. As does the rockery. We used to have one and I loved choosing little plants.
Glad C.Chops is OK HVDY. Hope her sister recovers quickly too, and you enjoy your lazy day. So glad the MRI results showed no change.
Sweetpeasue sorry you missed your reading group. Your poor DH copes so well with the pain. He doesn't give in easily.
Wyllow3 sorry yesterday was so bad for you. Hope today was better and the new lady came. I think you are doing well, posting a little here.
Very kind post Whiff.
Doodle good to hear from you, and that you are being well looked after. I'm sure some of your memories will return in time. I'm glad you're finding comfort at church.

Goodnight to everyone on BD. I hope you all have a peaceful night. Sorry for short post. I may not post for a couple of days, I'm worried about one of my children and trying to adjust to coping with it.

HVDY sons have been amazing. Don’t know what I would do without them and their families. My DGS baked me a chocolate brownie today to cheer me up.
How old is Chubby Chops now? I’m losing track of time.
Scaredycat my dear dad loved a rockery. He always found such pretty things to plant in them. He was a keen gardener.
Sweetpeasue sorry to hear your DH is still poorly. Hope the aspirin helps. What model is he working on now?
Sorry you missed book club it sounds quite bad where you are.
Dear Whiff you are so kind. I have shed a tear twice today. Once at church lighting a candle for DH and once reading a prayer that the vicar gave me. It just touched a nerve.
Wyllow I’m sorry you feel so bad. Please don’t give up hope. We have to battle on. I feel very panicked at the moment. I get frightened and in a panicked about not being able to remember things about DH (I have a severe memory problem and can’t picture things). I hope you find tomorrow a better day,
nadateturbe glad you had a better day. Please take care of yourself.
Ellie Anne and Candy hope you’re ok too.
Love too all x

Nadateturbe So glad you enjoyed the book. I found the scenes in the film beautiful too. How are you today? Hope your eyes are not too bad.
Scaredycat How clever to make a little rockery garden. I don't think I'd know where to start. Have you planted some little violas in it too ? We are quite behind with the garden and can't put in the climbing rose and solanum until the trellis has been put up. So wet today-torrential rain .
HVDY Aw glad your little chubby chops is feeling better. Hope her sister doesnt have the bug too long. Good to hear the MRI results showed no change in the Meningioma- you must feel quite relieved. It must be a bit scary. Do you have to have a scan annually? Hope your DH has been OK lately.
Wyllow I'm so sorry yesterday was so bad for you. You are doing well managing to dress , even if you don't think you are. It must have been disappointing to not have the worker turn up when you were geared up for the visit. I hope you managed to get out with her today, even if it was just a shop or coffee. The weather may not have been good for a walk unfortunately. Take heart and keep on Wyllow. You are doing well coming in and posting.
Doodle It's good that you have lovely caring sons to help you. Let them do as much as you can. You must be so exhausted . Sending you love and a hug. X

No book group today as roads are so bad and sone flooding so not ventured out. DH has started taking Aspirin (we saw a UTube thing about Temporal Arteritis) and a Dr had suggested it for pain. Of course ,not been diagnosed as that, but we're not taking chances. He's still had it today - but managed to do some model making.
Hope everyone is OK. .

Wyllow3 How was your day? Did the new MH worker come?

Doodle. I hope you're managing to eat something and rest when you can

Sweetpea Sue how are you and your husband today?

I finally had a letter from the consultant) after I rang his secretary a week ago) to say that the brain MRI I had, Feb 7th showed the Meningioma hasn't grown. That's a relief. How's everyone else? x

Doodle I hope you are looking after yourself and letting others help you with all the paperwork and everything else. This might seem nonsense to you. My best friend's husband died 18 months ago they are Christians. I said have you found any feathers in the house today she said yes 3 I told her that was P trying out his wings . She laughed then cried and said she hadn't been able to cry that day but now she could . She kept the feathers. She said I had helped her . Hopefully if this doesn't help you might give you a little smile . ❤️

How's everyone doing? Chubby Chops is feeling better, her usual happy self - but her sister has now got a stomach bug and is off school. It's been pouring with rain since the early hours, absolutely teeming. Staying in today and being lazy. Hope ALL BDers are ok x

Night night all. Been very bad, can’t find hope, forcing getting dressed, eating, believing any different. I thought a worker was coming today but she didnt, then found out it was tomorrow, but…well badly stuck in this.

Sweetpeasue I hope DH gets some help soon. And understand the mixed feelings about that last session.

I didn’t realise you were into photography, it’s good to hear, Scaredycat.

Well done with the housework and duvet, nadateturbe

HVDY, that is so frustrating, it’s happened too much as one has to flit between pages. I hope chubby chops picks up soon.

Dear Doodle I’m so glad your boys are there. Hug.

Night night to all BD’s

Will chat tomorrow. Had a good day, but don't want to overdo it.
Hope C Chops is ok HVDY.
Hope you and DH are all right Sweetpeasue.
Hi Scaredycat 👋

Have been lying listening to Hildegarde von Bingen (I know, I'm weird, but it's so relaxing).
Hoping all BDs have a peaceful night.x

So difficult Doodle all the things that need done at this time. I'm sure your boys will look after things. Sending hugs.x

Doodle There's a lot to arrange, I suppose. I'm glad your boys are helping you. x

Been a day of sorting things out and arranging DHs funeral.
Sons have been amazing. Don’t know how I would have coped without them.
Hope you’re all ok and I will try and catch up soon x

ScaredyCat My dad and 2 brothers all used to go to a photography club - they each had several cameras, lenses, etc., 1 brother even had a darkroom. It always sounded so interesting to me. How many people go to your club? Didn't see DIL and baby today. She cancelled as Chubby Chops isn't feeling well. She's probably got a bit of a virus. DH went to a lovely cafe and had an early lunch, all homemade and nice, then I did some housework. He's just gone to see Son1, so I've got the house to myself for a bit.

Hope everyone is OK x

Nadateturbe- glad you’re up and about today. It’s still raining so no watering - hooray!! Just got back from photography. Our subjects were Music,vehicles and the letter J so no cat photos! We send our photos in advance so I,ll use the cat photo when it fits the subject. It is interesting to see what everyone does- also it’s nice and friendly and chatty!
Hope you got a nice duvet
HVDY- isn’t it annoying when you lose a long post. Hope you,ve had a nice day.

Bloody hell - I typed a lot and somehow lost it, so I'll just say I hope ALL BDers are ok today, see you later x

Candy6 Glad you had a nice break in the caravan. I expect you've got washing to do now.
nadateturbe Your painting sounds interesting. Hope you get your new duvet ok. I keep looking at new bedding but have already got 8 sets for each bed (and that's after I've got rid of some).
ScaredyCat I hope you're going to show your photography club the photo of Birdhouse Cat .

Good morning Scaredycat, yes I like when it rains a little and I don't have to start unravelling the hose.
Your cat photo will be popular at photography I think. What were your subjects this month. Sounds interesting.
Sweetpeasue, finished the book. Will buy more. Really enjoyed. Have the film to watch.
Back later.x