Black Dog 22

Wyllow3 thanks.
I hope you find the person you need. Sorry yesterday wasn't great. I hope you manage to shower and dress today.
Is there something that distracts you from thinking?

I was up, showered and out at 9am to meet husbands daughter and SiL before they got the plane back to Gatwick. My body was there, not sure my brain was fully engaged.

HVDY
Several vodkas should do it
😁

ScaredyCat Your seat sounds nice. Yes, some pretty fairy lights in the evening brightens the garden up. We don't much like gardening. Ours is a long garden, and we've acquired a 10ft trampoline from DIL . Some fence panels need painting again. We did them recently, but they've turned out patchy. How are you? How is your sister now?

nadateturbe You had some lovely gifts then. Chocolate wouldn't last long in this house! A neighbour of mine said there's a badger that visits someone on the next street! I've only ever seen a live one, once, but that was a road next to lots of fields - we live on an estate. I hope you have a much better day today. No need to ever apologise for not posting , all understand.

Wyllow3 I might get some more of those pots (Amazon, Temu) Sorry to hear you had such a bad day. I hope today will be better for you. The carer (when you get one) - will they be helping you to get out, or do housework?

I've got my wedding outfit ready, am going to try hard to enjoy the day, no matter what. Several vodkas should do it . Hope ALL BDers manager to see some sunshine x

Don’t understand the last two posts.
Nadateturbe we only go out together if it is something to do with the family.
Think many of you are having good weather but we are still grey.
Hvdy your little pots look nice.
Can’t write more now sorry.

Reported.

Message deleted by Gransnet for breaking our forum guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

I like your pretty pots, HVDY. But so sorry to hear about your legs.

Understood, Zakouma....

Doodle long hard hours sometimes. Well done on the balcony.

Sweetpeasue I do hope DH can find some relief soon. always worst at nights.

nadateturbe we never need to feel bad about not being able to post much. I expect you are like em we al belong here but cant always say much.

Yes, I'm waiting for the care agency but they aren't MH agency as such so need to find someone who can cope, I need to be able to say what I'm feeling.. Today was the pits dressing gown and extra meds to cope with thoughts.

Love to BD's in, or struggling too much to come in, or reading xx

HVDY Your poor legs, I remember you suffering last summer with vasculitis. That's all you need on top of the hip pain. I hope it's not too warm tomorrow where the wedding is and you have a good time.
Yes thanks, I got lots of flowers and other things and chocolate. I have enough dark chocolate to last for months.*Scaredycat*, thanks. Your garden seat sounds nice. I too like lights in the garden and candles in the evening.
I've just read that you've got a fox too. How lucky! I don't know anyone who's ever seen a fox here in NI. I love foxes.
Sweetpeasue no wonder your DH is tetchy, all that pain and no sleep. I'm sure you're both at the end of your tether. I hope and pray you get the help you need soon. Hope you had a nice time with auntie.
Well done on cleaning your balcony Doodle. Are you doing some painting at home? I like painting and listening to classic fm. Are you managing to sleep without the diazepam. My bf takes them sometimes.
Wyllow3 I hope you manage to get someone to cut your hair. It always gives you a lift.
Allsorts I totally agree. If you can manage it, getting out and chatting to anyone always helps. That's why self-service checkouts are not always a good thing. Human beings need human contact.
EllieAnne how have you been today? Does your husband ever go out with you? You mentioned having memory problems and seeing a shadow. I think your eyes can play tricks. I often think I've seen something moving across the floor and there's nothing. And it's quite common as we're older to forget names. Everyone I know does it. Someone suggested name tags in art as we continually forget names. I think if you get anxious about it it makes it worse.
Wave to Whiff and Candy.
Sorry, I've been very poor at keeping in touch recently for different reasons. And if I've ignored anyone it's not on purpose.

Doodle- Dot painting is fun isn’t it- I think it’s called pointillism. It’s very natural that you should have low times - it’s still so raw for you. I remember feeling frightened too. It was so hard for you to have 2 significant dates so close- glad you had company for a while.
The lights look pretty - it’s a very small garden and yes I have a seat in a shady corner- one like a wicker egg. Your bowl sounds lovely. There’s just something about lights that cheers me up,so much.
Nadateturbe- Belated Happy Birthday- such a shame you couldn’t celebrate with your family. Hope you can have your get together on Monday.
Wyllow- hope you have had a restful day and that tomorrow brings some lighter moments.
SweetPeaSue- Oh dear 4am was an early bird start for DH. No wonder he’s a bit tetchy he must be knackered.
Hope you had a nice outing with your Aunt- it’s so lovely how you make time for her, is she your Mums Sister?
HVDY- so sorry you are in so much pain- it must be the last straw to have a Vasculitis flare up too. It does seem a scan would be better first instead of physio. As I think I said my sister was made to do physio which was entirely the wrong thing for her.

Your pots will look nice- we love colour in the garden too but we’re not good gardners. Lights add such a happy touch don’t they.
Zakouma- hope you had some good moments today- but you’re right some days are a bit unrelenting.
Love to allxx

Thank you. I haven't done the physio exercises today, the pain has been too bad. I need to speak to the Physiotherapist and ask him to refer me for an MRI to determine what's wrong - GPs can't do that, apparently.

When I was on steroids for Asthma a few years ago, I'd neen taking them at night, not knowing that they cause Insomnia. I used to be ironing at 3am! Is your husband taking them at the right time? Morning is the best time to have them.

HVDY That's just so awful for you. I do hope they get to the bottom of what's causing the pain , and they don't take too long about it. I understand that sometimes physio will help, but it's a shame they don't find out what it actually is. If it's a trapped nerve - is there anything else they can do?
Yes DH can't sleep and has been getting up early for at least a week now. I'm wondering if it's the steroids. His mood is tetchy too.
Do hope you're OK for the wedding tomorrow. x

SweetpeaSue Your husband was dressed at 4am? . Poor man. What was it that made him wake so early?

nadateturbe I'm glad you had some visitors. Did you get some nice cards and presents? Hope you had cake

zakouma66 Yes, very. What have you been up to?

Doodle You're doing well. Do you put the radio on for a bit of background sound? I bet it's lovely to sit on your balcony and watch the river.

I'm very fed-up. I've been in agony with my hips/groin, whatever it is, and my Vasculitis has started up because of the warm weather, so my legs are burning like mad (even though I've worn trousers all day). Hope things will be easier for the wedding we're going to tomorrow. Hope ALL BDers have a pleasant evening x

nadateturbe we bought our granddaughter a light box a few years ago. She used it a lot.
Wyllow I hope you can get your hair cut soon. I was desperate to have mine cut it had been over 4 months when I event Had it cut.
HVDy I love coloured lights. I’ve got a solar powered bowl on my balcony that goes through all the colours of the rainbow at night. It’s so pretty.
Yes Father’s Day and DHs birthday came close together. Hard to get through. Some days I cope much better than others, if I keep busy and don’t think to much I get by better but in the quiet times and mornings I struggle.
Sweetpeasue I am in ADs p. Have been for about 5 weeks now. I have diazepam to help me sleep but haven’t taken any so far. Your aunt will be pleased to see you. Nice of you to take her out,
zakouma hope you’re ok. I hate the long days. Are you feeling ok?
I’ve cleaned my balcony today. Hard work but I’m pleased with the result.

Sweetpeasue thanks for such kind thoughts Really appreciated but I'm OK. Although like you, I'm not always. It gets to you sometimes, but it passes. There's no other option really. I'm glad you got to take auntie out. You're coping very well. Thinking of your poor DH. xx
Just had birthday visitors. Lovely but worn out.
Thinking of you Doodle.x
Sending love to everyone.
Zakouma66 hugs.

Gosh BD folk, what a long day its turning out to be.

Oh Doodle So sorry you had such a sad day yesterday. All the 'firsts' --anniversarys, birthdays, are going to be extra hard for you. Have you got a kind GP who understands if you feel you are going to sink . You really have made a huge effort going to an art class - don't expect too much of yourself. The art class is quite large but I hope you find some friends there and you start to look forward to it every week. Hope today is much better . Another hug across the miles to join Scaredycat's.
Nadateturbe What an awful shame that you weren't well on your birthday and unable to see family. I'm so sorry .You face your circumstances with such bravery. I can't imagine how hard it is for you when even strong emotions can wear you out -I'd feel so angry and want to shout about it not being fair. Believe me - in the past ,when my pain was at its worst I wasn't a nice person at times. Sending love and really hope you start to feel much better.x

Wanted to post to others but must go now. Time to get ready to pick up aunt. DH got up and dressed at 4am as couldn't sleep. Told him he didn't have to come but he's coming anyway. I feel so tired with worry. Hope you all have as good a day as you can and wishing comfort for those who are very low. X

*

ScaredyCat The cream should help you, then. Fingers crossed. I bought some stringed garden lights about 2 weeks ago, and am still waiting for DH to put them up. I'll see if he'll do them today. I bought some very pretty, coloured plant holders that will hang from the fence, so I need to get some small plants for them. We don't much like gardening, but I do like to see a bit of colour.

nadateturbe What a shame you were unable to go out for your birthday. I hope you can manage to meet up with your family on Monday.

Doodle I suppose the first birthday, Christmas, etc., will be sad for you, but it's good that your sons are in regular contact and that you had the company of a friend. You're doing so well. Your art class sounds interesting. I wish my brother would join something (he's got a car, plenty of money), but he doesn't make an effort. He's not a sociable person, anyway.

Wyllow3 The carer you're going to have - is it one via a care agency? I hope you don't have to wait too long.

I hope ALL BDers see a bit of sunshine today x

Very tired after yesterdays walk and had to get up early for cleaner.
Yes I must get my hair cut. It will be once or twice a week carer but still a wait, yes I can pay for her.

Lots of love everyone, caught up

Doodle koko dear

and all too night night BD's.

when it gets bad

Night night BD's.

Oh Doodle It's been a very sad day for you. I'm glad you had a friend with you. And your sons must be so sad too. You're honestly coping so well for such a short time.. But you're bound to have bad times when you just give in to the grief. You will be OK.
They have other family to see but we're hoping to have breakfast on Monday before they fly home. I'm fine. We always know I may cancel. . I got a lightbox as one of my presents. It's good for tracing outlines cheating before painting.

Allsorts that’s nice of you. Yes I do try and get out every day even if it’s only for a bit. How are you doing?
Scaredycat thank you. Sons are doing ok I think but miss talking to their dad. He always talked about work with them and other things. They used to have good chats,
I love lights in the garden. It’s nice in the summer to sit outside with some fairy lights on in the evening. Have you got a seat in the garden?
nadateturbe I’m so sorry you’re not up to going out on your birthday, what a shame. Are the family from England there for a while? Will you be able to meet up tomorrow perhaps?

HvDY art class was painting a picture with dots of different colours. Quite enjoyed it but mine was a bit blobby. There’s about 25 in the class I think.
Sorry you were in so much pain. Hope the meds help soon.
Nice of you to take your brother out and pay. Getting out and meeting people would help I’m sure but you can’t make people. I am doing my best to keep going . DHs birthday today so was really upset earlier but I’ve been with a friend and sons are phoning soon.
Wyllow so glad you got out for a bit. I’m sure it helps.
Hard to motivate yourself if you don’t feel like it.
I got very low for a period today and it made me a bit frightened that I might not get out of it. I hope gradually things are improving for you. Hope the new carer helps. MH support is often sadly lacking.
zakouma hope you’re having a good day.
Ellie Anne we’ve had sunshine all day. Been lovely. Sorry it’s been so cold were you are. Hope it warms up for the weekend and you can get out somewhere.
Sweetpeasue it’s hard for you to just stand by when you want your DH to have help. Hopefully he will listen to you and act on it.
Scaredycat and Candy have a good weekend

Stuck in bed, meant to be with DH and his children (visiting from England) in a little Italian restaurant. Its my birthday. But hey ho, have Countdown to watch and Corrie. A day for singing 🎶 The sun'll come out tomorrow" . Great lyrics.
Doodle so glad art was more chatty and enjoyable. Thinking of you xx
I'll have to feel more energetic to post more.

Love to everyone. xx

Hi all
Doodle- glad you enjoyed Art Class more this week. It really is absorbing once you get into it and one day you will find your own style and feel more confident.
I hope your boys are doing ok - it’s not easy for them is it - missing their Dad and knowing how sad you are. They must be so proud of you and how hard you are trying.
One day at a time Doodle - you are so brave and kind to care for us all too as you do. Hugs across the miles
HVDY- the cream should scab up and then the healthy skin appears- we,hope!!
Glad the BBQ went well- lovely family times. Baby will grow up a very sociable child with such a friendly ,warm family.
Your brother is a hard one to help isn’t he- you can’t do more than you are doing. It would be good if he could build up a life for himself as he knows your SiL is being seen after well.
Glad the squirrel was only chilling- the bees like bird baths too don’t they.
You’re right about cake it should be on prescription!,🍰🍰🍰
SweetPeaSue- thank you for such kind remarks. I have become very fond of everyone here and feel like we,are,getting to know each other well now.
What you,say is,so true- you have to plant an idea in a man’s head and in the end they think it was their,idea!!
We are lucky aren’t,we that the ADs are helping us- I,m so pleased for you.
It’s hot here too- we did some,pots in the garden and put up some lights. Overdid it again but was loving it.
Allsorts- nice to see you today- hope you have had some bright moments in your day
Zakouma- hope the fine weather doesn’t make you sad- the grey days are the ones I don’t like.
EllieAnne- Perhaps tomorrow will be warmer and you can get out for a while. So sorry weekends are so difficult for you.
Wyllow- good to hear you went for a walk- hope,the psychologist was nice company. I,m sorry your physical health is not so good- that alone brings you down I expect.
Would you consider a mobile hairdresser? Your new helper might be able to sort one.put for you when they start.
I admire so much how you are KOKO- you will get there - you are cared for x
Candy,Whiff, Nanny,Nadateturbe and all wishing you a peaceful night.

HVDY I'm very well today thanks. My bladder pain seems to come on in early morning and I take my medication. If I'm lucky I will just feel discomfort on and off throughout the day. Started Fluids diary for Urologist yesterday. What a carry on it all is. Containers lined up along the bath for frequent night time visits and have to put down time aswell. DH hasn't been too bad today, and been cutting ivy. Hope it stays that way. So warm here.
How has your pain been today? Hope its not been as bad as it was.
Allsorts Nice to hear you are managing to get out each day. I know you're right about speaking to someone. even if its a remarkable about the weather with a checkout assistant. All makes a difference somehow.
DoodleNadateturbe Zakouma66
Hope you are all OK today.
Wyllow So good to hear you had a walk out yesterday. I'm sure it must make a difference- just wish you could get more help. Keep on and one day you will wake and notice a chink of light.x

HVDY, you are so supportive of your brother who sounds a very selfish man, h3 certainly shows little regard for you or others.
Doodle glad your getting out, it’s very early days for you but I really think going out each day helps very much. Even if 8 just go to the shops I find someone to speak to asto9 much staying in for me leads to depression.
Thoughts with you all, Whylow, do try and get your hair done it always lifts you up.