Black Dog 23

Allsorts* hello and good advice to aim for.

Busy times, Candy and that seems to work for you. The gym, where I went to for 20 years, and all the people there, to face up to, are several steps too far atm.

Good to read of the catch up Scaredycat and do appreciate the miracle on meds available bit! Sorry its jelly legs.

I really like Sketchers shoes, HVDY, comfiest I’ve had. Poor LittleGirl, hope the crusts go soon.

It sounds like on the whole the group is a plus, Sweetpeasue So glad to read, “better now”. You are right about the physical/mental balance: it’s hard for you to accept the pains as ongoing - no you are not moaning.
DH’s pictures are very powerful!

Doodle we’ll see what they say about my meds on Monday - a hug always nice. Glad last night was a little better, nights can be worst. Of course you are so lonely and having to take over the paperwork always a reminder x

nanny you do well to be there to support you GD with special needs.

Ellie Anne you live in a very difficult situation all the time - no wonder you aren’t good.

Yes it was my carer today, and we went for a walk in the Botanical Gardens. The sun actually came out.

I feel I’m beginning to trust her: sadly she’s not around next week or a fortnight after that, it will take time to get to the point to start arranging things like hairdresser and missed hospital check ups and stuff tho, feels like just walking and being with someone else matters most atm.

EllieAnne Sorry you are still finding communication with DH so hard.
It will be better for you both if his ears are cleared of the wax and at least you won't have the TV volume so loud.
Hope your pain settles after walk. You have been able to take comfort in your walks which is helpful for you.
Don't worry about a moan. It makes others feel they're able to do so too.
Hope you sleep well tonight. xx

Doodle I missed your post as you posted close behind me.
Lots of Heather in the NY moors nr us. We are so lucky to live close to moors and coast.
I do hear what you say about the paperwork, thankyou. It's very scary but I understand.
Hope you sleep tonight too. X

Those pictures are amazing!
I’m not good . Still the ongoing problem of dh s hearing. He gets angry when I shout but it’s the only way to get through to him especially as he never turns tv or radio down when I’m trying to tell him something. Tomorrow he’s going to get the wax removed so maybe that will help.
Went for a walk this morning and have been in pain since.
My dh takes nothing to do with the paperwork and I m not good at it so nothing is very organised. I’m sick of doing everything.
Sorry for moaning.
Hope everyone has a decent night.

doodle I flicked through some posts and thought I had seen that your DH died but I didn't want to mention in case I misunderstood xxx

scaredy I'm very unsure now. One of my GDs has a form of autism and I really want to be there for her as she navigates school

doodle yes they are living with me I don't get to see him much as his mum is very protective over him.

HVDY yeah binks is a bit fluffier I did press reply on your comment but it looks like I said GS looks like binks 🤣

Sorry Scaredycat, I should say he finds pictures/photos then tries to paint them
onto canvass.

https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202410/medium-963174-1000005755.jpg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202410/medium-298640-1000005749.jpg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202410/medium-634228-1000005710.jpg

Scaredycat I've some of DHs paintings here.

Allsorts So sorry for this past year being especially bad. To feel abandoned by your family must be a huge blow when you're now on your own and could do with some love. You have and are 'making a life for yourself ' as you put it and that must have taken and must take a lot of effort and strength. As Scaredycat says , your post is so positive.
Idea of thankfulness for those who make us happy or have made us happy is a good one , thankyou.
Wyllow As always ,I wish I could change things for you and I would firstly magic away your physical ill health . I know MH is just as important but I do think it's so very hard when you are in pain or discomfort on an ongoing basis.
Yes it was a bad day for me though not really much different to most days now. I don't know where all this flu- like (though not as bad) aches are coming from. It brings you done mentally and so I understand a little about that. Of course I'm lucky in that I've DH to help. You are having to do everything yourself. I hope the meds are all coming through for you now. Not fair you're having to cope with all that aswell.
Think your carer comes tomorrow. I expect you will feel you'll have to make extra efforts. Hope your relationship with your carer becomes closer so you can let things out to her. Love and another 🫂. Xx

Nadateturbe*EllieAnne *Whiff Hoping you're all OK and coping and hugs if you're feeling bad.

I didn't go to book group today as couldn't face it. Trip round supermarket with DH and just feeling like I hadn't a scrap of energy in me though aches and shooting pains every day. I promise I'll stop moaning about them now. Can't see it getting better so will have to put up with it. Not got blood test results back yet. DHs headaches still staying away with steroids though arm/ hand still painful. He's been managing to do some painting on and off though. He's looking forward to next week away.

Hoping all have a peaceful night.xx

HVDY hope Little Girl feels better soon. Thanks for the advice I might try taking myADs a little earlier. I usually take them when I go to bed.
Sorry you’ve had a bad cough. Jaffa obviously well at home now. Such a pretty car lovely colouring.
Hope your new shoes are comfortable. I didn’t know sketchers did shoes too.
Nanny I know exactly what you’re going through. How wonderful to have a new grandson. Do they live with you? A new baby is such a delight.
Wyllow so many meds can have side effects that are hard to cope with. Is there anything you can get to help?
I’ll send you a hug today in case you need it.
Allsorts thank you for your kind words of encouragement. I find these dark wet days so hard to cope with. I’m sorry you feel abandoned by your family. Do they not keep in touch?
I’m glad you get out and are making a life for yourself, I am doing the best I can but still so lonely without DH.
Candy so many towns hardly have any shops left. We are lucky we have M&S but if that closes there would be nothing to tempt me into town. Hope you’re having a good week. Are you going to the caravan?
Scaredycat glad you had a nice meet up with your DGD.
I had a better night last night thank you. I will try HVdY tip and take the ADs earlier tonight.
I love heather. Growing wild it is so beautiful, will yours go purple?
Sweetpeasue I did have a better night thank you. Glad you’re finding the MH group beneficial. Sounds like a nice group of peeople. Hearing others troubles often helps us.
Please get your DH to tell you about paperwork and accounts. We weren’t really prepared when DH went into hospital but luckily he did have time to sort out a few things for me. Even so it was difficult to do on my own and added to the stress of losing him. You always think there will be more time. I did.

Doodle It's very wearying when you can't sleep -hope you had a better night last night, without bad dreams! They are just the pits and can awaken bad memories that seem like you're reliving them. Hopefully your water is back on today. My DH does all our paperwork so I wouldn't know where to start - so glad your son can help you with that. Imagine some of it must be so distressing to deal with.
MH group not so bad Tuesday thanks. Never sure if any concerned tune into BD on GN but they're all older than me and I think I'm much better mentally now. They are all nice people. I ll probably go to another - sometimes it's nice just to listen to others too. It's an 8 week 'Steps to Recovery' programme. Last week requested 3 items of things that were important to your own identity (interests ect).
HVDY Your poor Littlegirl - she must feel quite miserable and I hope her blisters aren't too sore or itchy. Good idea the Calpol if she's irritated or restless particularly bedtime. Glad you've had a chat with friend today. Sketchers are comfy aren't they. I got a black suede pair , ankle boots with fur at top a couple of .weeks ago. Hope tomorrow is good with Littlegirl.
Candy Hope today didn't leave you too tired. I wish I could do more. Thanks for good wishes. Absolutely right that going away makes a change , no matter the weather. Having said that- hope it's not rain EVERY day.🙏
Nanny Glad to see your post again. I remember you telling us you had a DGC due to be born. Ahh a new little grandson , you must be over the moon. 12 weeks such a lovely age when they are smiling and you can make them giggle. He looks like Binks? 🤭 Doubly special then! I'm so sorry for your ongoing grief , really. It must be terrible. Sending ❤️.

Back soon.

Nanny2507 Grief like that must be awful. You've got a lovely baby who will need his Gran in his life now. Congratulations. Jaffa looks like your Binks?

Allsorts A kind, caring post to Doodle there.

Wyllow3 Will your carer be visiting tomorrow? Or is she fortnightly?

Candy6 Nice that you are able to take your GS to school sometimes. Did you fetch him as well?

ScaredyCat Nice that you met your GD. Coffee and cake is always good, too. I was unable to take him to the vet's (again). He became very frightened/angry when I tried to give him the sedative (who can blame him?) and scratched my hand very badly (it bled a lot). I'll try a bathsheet to contain him next time. DH refuses to help me with the cat!

Nadateturbe, EllieAnne how are you both?

I got some bits and pieces from B&M, then some black Sketchers shoes (not trainers)from a local shoe shop. My aqua friend came round for a chat and a coffee for a couple of hours. Got LittleGirl tomorrow - she's ok in herself now, but the blisters have burst and gone crusty, so she looks a sorry state. Hope ALL BDers are ok x

SweetPeaSue- Sorry you are having those old aches and pains- it must be very wearying.
Did you find the MH group helpful yesterday - well done for giving it another go. What nice times you have with your GS- he will have such lovely memories of those days when he is older.
I,d love to see your DH Art work- I too loved portraits and faces in general. A gorilla is a bit of a challenge. My Son used to love Gorillas when he was little - I even made a Birthday cake with Gorillas on it once.😀
Hope today has been more comfortable for youxx

Afternoon all.
This morning I had coffee and cake and a lovely catch up,with our eldest GD. We walked to get our meds this afternoon- a miracle they were all there!! Very tired now - but a more normal day.
Nanny- Congratulations on the birth of your new Grandson- what lovely news. Can’t believe he is already 12 weeks old.
I,m so sorry your days have so much sadness in them. Do I remember rightly you were thinking of moving to be nearer your Son ?
Glad to see you- take,care .
Allsorts- that was such a lovely,understanding and hopeful post. You are a very kind person I think.
I liked your idea of a daily moment of remembrance or thanks for those who made or make us happy.
I hope life treats you kindly and the sun shines for you often.
Candy- thank you- so pleased it’s gone- I,m a bit of a walking jelly at the moment but that’s normal . Hope your friends and their family get well soon-
Hope,you,ve had a good day today and managed to fit in a little time for yourself too. Preferably with a bit of cake!!
Doodle- your Sons must be such a support and comfort for you. The paperwork can seem overwhelming at times can’t it.
I think the dark at both ends of the day is depressing . It seems to be getting dark so early this Autumn. Or maybe it’s just me being moany!!
Sorry your sleep is not so restful- some dreams really unsettle you don’t they and hang about all day sometimes. ADs have helped me sleep better - hope tonight you get some proper rest.
HVDY- I love shops but not the dire ones ours are becoming.
We bought some little different colour heathers and got a free box of plants as we have a loyalty card.
I hope LittleGirl is improving today- it really sounds a horrid thing to have.
Jaffa has definitely staked his claim- he is a very lucky moggy. Has he been to the vet yet?
Hope your cough goes soon and lets you sleep more restfully.
Wyllow- Ah please don’t say sorry to me - I,m sorry if I sounded like an old Nagger!!! I do understand how hard it is to break your cycle- especially as you feel unwell a lot of the time. I just know how much better I feel if I get out in the air and do stuff.
Sending a hug and hopes for a better day today xx
Nadateturbe- thinking of you toox
Love to all

Morning all

HVDY sorry LittleGirl has been poorly. I believe it’s a nasty thing to have. It didn’t seem to be around when my children were young, or at least I hadn’t heard of it. It was going around when DGS was younger, he didn’t get it though thankfully. Hope she is well soon. Jaffa has well and truly made himself at home!
Scaredycat I’m glad you have tested negative at last. My friends family has it at the moment. Symptoms still seem to vary so much. I hope you are enjoying your “freedom” as much as you can. Our local town is a bit depressing, full of the same shops you describe, it seems a lot of places are the same. We have a small city not far away, in fact the same distance to the town (because we live on the border). Its much nicer but that too has lost a lot of the shops it used to have. Quite sad.
Sweetpeasue hope you enjoy your break away and it does you both good. Just being somewhere different is nice, a break from the norm. Sorry about your bad day yesterday and you did well to still care for your DGS. I hope today is better for you.
Doodle nice to see your sons and get things sorted. It can be stressful getting everything sorted. I hope your days are getting better and you are doing all you can to help yourself. Hope you are doing something nice today.
Wyllow I’m sorry you are still having bad days but glad you are managing to do some things. I realise it may be a big leap and one you feel is too much for you at the moment, but could you consider going to your gym? I remember you used to do that and even just a short visit may help? I hope today is kind to you.
Ellie Anne sorry you situation is no different and I wish there was something we could do to help. It must be so difficult for you. Try and do something nice for yourself every day. Sending you hugs.
nanny2507 sending you a big hug and many congratulations on your new GS. Hope he brings you joy.
Allsorts you have a good positive outlook that must help you get through each day. A lovely positive post. I hope today is kind to you.
Thinking of Nadaterturbe and everyone else not mentioned. Time to take GS to school now and lots to do in between but what’s new? Hope everyone has the best day possible. Take care all,

Read all your posts and i see your daily struggles. This year has been my worst since my husband died. I don't post how i feel as there are no answers. Just feel abandoned by my family.
Doodle, for a few years i couldn't remember my husband well, it kept going through my mind, his final year which was dreadful. I really didn't want to be here. Gradually by forcing myself to go out and do things the sunshine started to peep through. I will never feel that happiness and security I used to have all gone so quickly. I travelled, did up my house and made a life, not the one I would have chosen. My husband died too young, never a retirement. It all felt so unfair. When I really opened my eyes I knew I had far more than others never get a chance of and changed my mindset and am now grateful for what I had. It takes time one day you will remember the good times.
All of you struggling, as I still do, lets try everyday to remember someone that made or makes us happy.

Aw, poor LittleGirl, HVDY - glad she is eating. I hope you manage to get out tomorrow for shoes and a mooch around. Not much fun for LittleGirl out in this weather either. I do recall Calpol for son, that would have been around 1983/4?

Yes, I have an afternoon lie down after some meds late afternoon, just cant keep going for longer than that. And yes, it’s a catch 22 situation I cant get out of atm.

Sorry you couldn’t manage more than the today, Scaredycat - the grey light is so lowering, yes. You’re right about what I should do but…sorry!

Thank you for my hug and love Sweetpeasue

I did think yesterday must have been bad for you as you didn’t come in here to BD’s like you usually do. I hope the MH group was OK? Busy day for you with DGS too.

Yes I usually feel unwell Doodle, I can’t say how the lots of meds I take affect me.
I’m not surprised you have difficult nights and just hope so much tonight is a better one. Waking up so much and not enough sleep is a lot to cope with for you - and an early dreary morning is hard to bear for you.

Nanny those feelings of wishing you hadn’t woken up are very understandable, (another day.....) especially if you are tired all the time from lack of sleep. Congratulations on your new GS, and hope you’ll keep popping in when things are difficult.

He looks a bits like binks

Hello everyone. Still firmly in the jaws of grief. Wishing some days I hadn't woken up. So tired but unable to sleep. Good news is I have a new beautiful GS. 12 weeks old now.

SweetpeaSue I gave her a couple of does of Calpol, which helped. I don't remember that being around for our sons. I remember Junior Aspirin (orange flavoured?). How did the MH group go this time? I bet your GS loves seeing you after school. We used to play board games with the GDs but they're not interested now. I bought the (recently) 10 year old Charades for kids, for a change.

Doodle It's not passed from animals, but other children (with their grubby little hands and putting things in their mouths). It lasts 7 to 10 days. When will your water be back on? Hope not too long. ADs are designed to cause drowsiness. I take mine about an hour before bed and they knock me out usually. Hope you have abetter night tonight.

I feel worn out - was up at 6. Jaffa has slept on the bed all night for the past 2 nights (he just came upstairs after we'd gone to bed). and has been no bother at all. I've been coughing a lot all night, though. (this weather and having a cold). Hope ALL BDers get a decent rest x

ScaredyCat I've mentioned it before, but I loathe going around shops - there are a lot of charity, vape and nail bars not far from us, too. We've got 2 B&M stores, though, so I might have a look in there tomorrow. Just to get outside for a while. What kind of plants did you get?

HVDY poor Little Girl. I hope she’s not feeling too poorly. Do you catch it from contact with animals? I think I have heard of it before. It’s been pouring here all day too. Hope tomorrow is better and you can get your new shoes.
Sweetpeasue how did the MH group go this week? Nice to spend time with your DGs. Hope the pain is better today.
No I didn’t have a meal with my sons I just met up with them to talk about some paperwork I’m still struggling with. All sorted now.
It’s not so much the dark nights as the dark dreary mornings I have a problem with. It seems we have no water at the moment. The gas men have gone through a water main. Hope it’s sorted before morning.
Scaredycat you need to take it easy. You’ve been quite poorly with the Covid and it must have taken it out of you. Glad you’re able to get out and about now though.
Didn’t sleep too well had an upsetting dream and then couldn’t shake it off. That’s two nights running. Hoping tonight will be better.
Wyllow I’m really tired too. I wake up two or three times a night and then awake for a bit before going back to sleep.
Are you on medication that makes you tired. I think my ADs might be making me more sleepy. Do you feel unwell?
I’m ok just tired.

HVDY Your poor, poor Littlegirl- what a horrid thing to have. I had to look it up , I'd never heard of it. Do hope she starts to feel better soon. They're so helpless aren't they, and you just want to take away their pain and irritations. Hope she's managed to eat her dinner and the sudacrem is great stuff for her blisters.
Scaredycat Bloomin covid indeed. Glad you managed the garden centre. Your description of your local town matches that of ours 7ml away .Sad isn't it? Strangely ,DH doesn't do a lot of landscapes. He often paints portraits , faces and animals( Gorilla on go at moment) He's done lions too.
Doodle Glad you are seeing your sons for dinner. Hope you've had company today. The nights getting darker early now and must be so hard for you. Love as always.
Wyllow It's such an uphill struggle for you and the days must be so long on your own indoors. Glad you managed the shop yesterday. I know what you mean about waking early -it can make the day seem longer . When you feel bad physically it does affect your mood so much. Sending a hug and love.

Bad day yesterday with just exhaustion and body pains.Been to MH group today and had DGS from school and gave him tea and played some board games. Shattered now .

Hope everyone's day been the best it can be and love to all BDs.



Scaredycat