Fuming

M0nica

There is nothing to beat talking to other patients in the practice.

Some years ago when still working, DH went to see the doctor compalining about extreme tiredness and falling asleep at work. It was dismissed as normal in a 60 year old commuting into London, an hour and a half away.

Then chatting to a neighbour and telling this story, he recommended a different doctor in the practice, so we made an appointment to see him( you could then). He listened to DH said, 'This is not normal and I think I know what the problem is' . With that he picked up a little device pricked DH's finger, looked at the reading and said 'Yes, you have diabetes.' So further tests were ordered and he received treatment for it. Problem solved.

I also think what suits one doesn't always suit another. My husband and I see different doctors at our surgery, I see a woman who isn't much younger than me and we are on the same wave length. DH can be a grumpy old man and the doctor he sees is great with him, one of the nurses tactfully confided in me that he known for being good with older gentlemen when I commented about how well he managed him.

Crazymum

I'd almost forgotten about junior aspirin , it was my mums answer for everything . But I loved the taste . ( my brother loved it so much he climbed up to reach the bottle, and took 100 of them. He was in hospital a couple of days) . But we usually treated things at home, either through a local lady who knew "stuff" or if serious we used the chemist .

There were orange flavoured ones.

I gave them to my DC. Before the scare.

I'd almost forgotten about junior aspirin , it was my mums answer for everything . But I loved the taste . ( my brother loved it so much he climbed up to reach the bottle, and took 100 of them. He was in hospital a couple of days) . But we usually treated things at home, either through a local lady who knew "stuff" or if serious we used the chemist .

M0nica

I won't quote theworriedwell s post, but accpeted as above.

Cariadagain I am coming to the conclusion that a lot of your problems arise from your manner. It is not what you say, but the way that you say it.

You are clearly an articulate person, as I am, but many people are not, but to quote the song, I have always found that ' a spoonful of sugar helps the medecine go down' .

I use being nice to people as a weapon to get things done the way I want them, even when, internally, I would willingly throttle the person I am talking to. Try it, you may find it surprisingly effective.

I agree with you, a spoomful of sugar is certainly a useful technique to adopt and like you I manage to get things sorted by being nice, polite and very prepared to thank people for their co-operation.

I use being nice to people as a weapon to get things done the way I want them, even when, internally, I would willingly throttle the person I am talking to. Try it, you may find it surprisingly effective.

Wise words indeed Monica.
That was my method when trying to deflect angry parents from accosting staff. It usually worked!

I won't quote theworriedwell s post, but accpeted as above.

Cariadagain I am coming to the conclusion that a lot of your problems arise from your manner. It is not what you say, but the way that you say it.

You are clearly an articulate person, as I am, but many people are not, but to quote the song, I have always found that ' a spoonful of sugar helps the medecine go down' .

I use being nice to people as a weapon to get things done the way I want them, even when, internally, I would willingly throttle the person I am talking to. Try it, you may find it surprisingly effective.

CariadAgain

biglouis

I wish my GP practice would stop pestering me and sending people to take my blood etc without making an up front appointment. Ive had to complain about this several times to the practice manager and there was an up front arrangement made to text me the day before a visit. These people ring on multiple phones - like many people I dont answer unknown numbers - then bang at the door like they were the drugs squad. They have no idea how intimidating that can come across to a vulnerable elderly person who lives alone. I wish they would bugger off and pester people who are much sicker than I am.

They strike me as being very rude and very presumptuous and I'd defo not count myself as being "vulnerable elderly person" as you do - more like "early 70's person - well able to stand up for myself".

You could be out or busy or just having an afternoon nap for all they know. They're just acting like you don't have A Life/anything else you might be doing and that they can just turn up whenever it suits them personally.

Seems like an official letter to the practice manager might be an idea - along the lines of "When I said 'text' = I meant 'text' and not 'phone call' and reminding her of the arrangement you have made with them. I'd be inclined, in your position, to do them a letter specifically stating the means of contacting you/notice you expect and make sure you keep a copy.

If they just turn up again - then a quick note sent to them of "I enclose a copy of my letter to you of such-and-such date stating what arrangements are required for visits to me". If need be - ie because they do it again - then they get another note saying "I enclose AGAIN a copy of my letter to you of x date" and, if need be, repeat this procedure several times in a row. So - until they get the message then.

I've done this before now - in a different medical context - ie I rang my doctors surgery at the beginning of Covid jabs and told them not to EVER contact me in any way re them, as I wouldnt be having one. I was concerned because some people I know had had contact after contact after contact (around 12 contacts on average seemed to be not abnormal!).

It worked for some months - and then they contacted me again and I reminded them of what I'd told them in the first place. Months passed and then they just sent me a standard letter - saying "We've made an appointment for you at so-and-so time and place for a flu jab. Whilst you're there - howzabout a Covid jab too". Cue for I waited until I had to go into the surgery anyway for a health issue - and I slammed it down very hard on the counter and asked them just how many times they intended to contact me re that - as I'd now told them 3 times NOT to do so ever about that. I think the message finally got home - when they had an irate me standing there 2' away from them - and yep...I do look intelligent and determined if someone physically encounters me in person LOL.

Sometimes one does has to repeat a message several times over - firmly - and in words of no more than 2 syllables before it finally gets through and they "hear" you.

You were unbelievably rude. Do you honestly feel proud of your behaviour? I think it would be reasonable for the surgery to ban you. I'd never have let me staff be spoken to like that when I was head of HR in a social care setting.

Have you ever thought of politely saying, "no thank you?"

Medicine is not an exact science and much of it is learnt experience and being able to listen and assess accurately. As in other professions I’ve found good and bad GPs and the best are prepared to listen carefully and admit when they do not know what is wrong but make an effort to investigate. In my practice I have got one partner who doesn’t listen and is arrogant, and another who is just the opposite. It’s a lottery quite frankly.

There is nothing to beat talking to other patients in the practice.

Some years ago when still working, DH went to see the doctor compalining about extreme tiredness and falling asleep at work. It was dismissed as normal in a 60 year old commuting into London, an hour and a half away.

Then chatting to a neighbour and telling this story, he recommended a different doctor in the practice, so we made an appointment to see him( you could then). He listened to DH said, 'This is not normal and I think I know what the problem is' . With that he picked up a little device pricked DH's finger, looked at the reading and said 'Yes, you have diabetes.' So further tests were ordered and he received treatment for it. Problem solved.

Some GPs aren't brilliant at diagnosis (I've heard it said that diagnosis is at least 10% intuition, so perhaps some of them don't have it) 30 years ago we had quite a pleasant GP but when I took my 16 year old son to see him because I thought he had Glandular Fever I was assured that it was just normal teenage idleness. Then he found the textbook spots in his mouth and had to hastily backpedal. He also treated a friend of mine who was suffering from excessive morning sickness (Think Princess Catherine with knobs on) He assured her she would be fine and didn't need any treatment. When her mother found her she was too weak to get out of bed and was vomiting blood. The hospital doctor was furious and said they could have sorted her out very quickly.

With our practice I have found that the best thing is to go in and speak to a receptionist. I say "What do you think I should do?" and they either point me somewhere else, or find me an appointment with a doctor or nurse if I need it.

I would imagine what Babs wanted and needed when feeling ill and vulnerable ,was a professional, caring medic.
Not a lecture.
She would not have bothered to go and attend if she had thought the problem could be easily solved with home remedies.

Allira

Farzanah

I feel sorry for doctors receptionists. They are only doing what they are instructed to do and often have to put up with rudeness and aggression directed at them because they are unfortunate enough to be on the front line of what is, in many areas, an overburdened and failing system.

🤔
Last year we encountered intransigence and rudeness from the receptionist at the surgery when we requested that we have our Covid and flu vaccinations separately. We ended up with no flu jabs because they then ran out.

This year it was a different receptionist and she was extremely helpful and considerate.

I have friend, who is a GP receptionist, who tells me they are subjected to abuse from patients on a daily basis.

One patient phoned to say she had been sick once, in twenty four hours and demanded to see a GP. When advised that it was not enough to warrant a face to face appointment, my friend was bombarded with abuse.
They do not have an easy job.

I was told by my GP that you should never neglect tonsillitis and that you definitely need antibiotics. I used to get it a lot, still do occasionally.

My husband got told by GP he had strained his back pain so bad after scans XRays etc consultant sent him home on Morphine and told nothing wrong eventually after more hospitals he was diagnosed with 4hip fractures

It's awful when you feel really unwell, phone the gp, politely ask for an appointment, or make an enquiry, and are met with someone being really rude, unexpectedly.

It's reduced me to tears many times, because it's unwarranted.

No excuse!
Each patient is different.

Can’t account for “bad apples” Allira but perhaps she’d put up,with a lot of aggro before you!

Farzanah

I feel sorry for doctors receptionists. They are only doing what they are instructed to do and often have to put up with rudeness and aggression directed at them because they are unfortunate enough to be on the front line of what is, in many areas, an overburdened and failing system.

🤔
Last year we encountered intransigence and rudeness from the receptionist at the surgery when we requested that we have our Covid and flu vaccinations separately. We ended up with no flu jabs because they then ran out.

This year it was a different receptionist and she was extremely helpful and considerate.

I feel sorry for doctors receptionists. They are only doing what they are instructed to do and often have to put up with rudeness and aggression directed at them because they are unfortunate enough to be on the front line of what is, in many areas, an overburdened and failing system.

A Nurse Practitioner diagnosed me as having post-op swelling............6 months AFTER my surgery........and they did this based on information passed on by a triage nurse in A & E without even examining me - in reality I had DVT!

and I slammed it down very hard on the counter and asked them just how many times they intended to contact me re that - as I'd now told them 3 times NOT to do so ever about that. I think the message finally got home - when they had an irate me standing there 2' away from them - and yep...I do look intelligent and determined if someone physically encounters me in person LOL
I’d be checking your blood pressure if I worked there.
Why ever slam something down? It almost certain,y wasn’t the same person who sent it.
But did it make you feel better? Empowered?
“Apoplectic and irrational” are not the same as “intelligent and determined “
But hey, have a strop, spoil somebody’s working day , after all, they have nothing better to do than put you top of their priorities

I'm not totally sure what qualifications the various people at our GP practice (and adjacent "out of hours" clinic - which is a godsend).

I have sometimes had poor treatment from two of the GPs (one of whom I refuse to see, having been on the end of his tongue both with my late mum who had alzheimers, with my husband, and with me, the other actually apologised to me, but the nurses are superb (whatever level they are) and if something is outside their level of competence they refer you to someone who has that.

However, getting appointments has become more problematic in recent years. But all in all I feel they are doing their best.

biglouis

I wish my GP practice would stop pestering me and sending people to take my blood etc without making an up front appointment. Ive had to complain about this several times to the practice manager and there was an up front arrangement made to text me the day before a visit. These people ring on multiple phones - like many people I dont answer unknown numbers - then bang at the door like they were the drugs squad. They have no idea how intimidating that can come across to a vulnerable elderly person who lives alone. I wish they would bugger off and pester people who are much sicker than I am.

They strike me as being very rude and very presumptuous and I'd defo not count myself as being "vulnerable elderly person" as you do - more like "early 70's person - well able to stand up for myself".

You could be out or busy or just having an afternoon nap for all they know. They're just acting like you don't have A Life/anything else you might be doing and that they can just turn up whenever it suits them personally.

Seems like an official letter to the practice manager might be an idea - along the lines of "When I said 'text' = I meant 'text' and not 'phone call' and reminding her of the arrangement you have made with them. I'd be inclined, in your position, to do them a letter specifically stating the means of contacting you/notice you expect and make sure you keep a copy.

If they just turn up again - then a quick note sent to them of "I enclose a copy of my letter to you of such-and-such date stating what arrangements are required for visits to me". If need be - ie because they do it again - then they get another note saying "I enclose AGAIN a copy of my letter to you of x date" and, if need be, repeat this procedure several times in a row. So - until they get the message then.

I've done this before now - in a different medical context - ie I rang my doctors surgery at the beginning of Covid jabs and told them not to EVER contact me in any way re them, as I wouldnt be having one. I was concerned because some people I know had had contact after contact after contact (around 12 contacts on average seemed to be not abnormal!).

It worked for some months - and then they contacted me again and I reminded them of what I'd told them in the first place. Months passed and then they just sent me a standard letter - saying "We've made an appointment for you at so-and-so time and place for a flu jab. Whilst you're there - howzabout a Covid jab too". Cue for I waited until I had to go into the surgery anyway for a health issue - and I slammed it down very hard on the counter and asked them just how many times they intended to contact me re that - as I'd now told them 3 times NOT to do so ever about that. I think the message finally got home - when they had an irate me standing there 2' away from them - and yep...I do look intelligent and determined if someone physically encounters me in person LOL.

Sometimes one does has to repeat a message several times over - firmly - and in words of no more than 2 syllables before it finally gets through and they "hear" you.

Been there done that.....I had a chest infection, knew if I got antibiotic I could stave it off..NP can't give you antibiotic as it's not bacterial..Go home have a hot drink ! By end of week I was awful had to go back seen her again. I could hardly walk or move but she insisted I come down. She said you can come in your pyjamas if you want! I think not! Iwas not happy gave me 3 days amoxycillin, told her it would not work with me now as it was too late..she refused to give me anything else despite looking at my record. On way out she said' I don't like your attitude!' I replied 'And I don't like yours much either!'Had to phone back 2 days later as I was really ill..refused to see this woman again...got someone else who queried why I hadn't been given the stronger antibiotic, given my history? I replied I asked and got told no...I was furious as I was needlessly far more ill than I should have been!

I can tell from different posts that there are big discrepancies where GPS are concerned in different parts of the UK. On my patch you are lucky to see a GP and even luckier if you get good service. And is not just our practice but friends at other practices near us say the same. To be honest if we feel really ill we will just ring 111 and go to A&E and if we need antibiotics for tonsillitis, sinusitis or treatment due a UTI we will go to our pharmacy.