Default lifelong calorie counting

So different being young and ‘happily chubby’ to being in your 70s with all the health problems that potentially come from being obese/ overweight.
We are bombarded about the problems that can be caused by our weight, not sure whether the young should be left to their own devices on this one, or be warned? By the time they are in their 20s maybe a gentle warning?

I believe I once read that weight problems kick in the moment you start diets or calorie counting
I’m not talking about the difference between 6 McDonalds a day washed down with a Krispy Keme doughnut, but that once you start restricting your calorie intake, your metabolism adjusts to that “new normal” and when you go back to your previous food intake, the lbs pile on.
I can’t vouch for the scientific truth but I do know that my mum came to the UK from Germany in 1946/7, typically Germanic big boned but very SLIM, even thin, as food had been in very short supply.
She had weight problems for the rest of her life. One diet after another- the Grapefruit duet, the Mayo Clinic diet, the 1000cals a day diet, Ayds (remember them?) - every diet under the sun.
She also started me watching what I ate in my teens and I can honestly say the only time I never had weight issues was as a student with the unhealthiest diet imaginable!

Good wholefood, not eating after tea time. It is not rocket science, nothing to be obsessed about. Energy in = energy out

Some added weight at menopause is natural as the female body compensates for reduced oestrogen, ok while the body adapts but added fat in later life is a contributer to breast cancer

Mouth hunger v real hunger are two different things

I was born in the 60s and honestly, I don't know anyone who lives like that. I have friends of all shapes and sizes and pretty much everyone eats what they want. Food is one of life's great pleasures and I just can't imagine living my life that way - even though I know I'm very much overweight and need to shed it. It seems just too much like control freak behaviour to me.

I have always been quite slim, but now early 70’s am very conscious how easy it would be to pack on the weight.

DH and I eat rather plainly, but sensibly I think.

Not so DS and DIL.

Both could do with losing a couple of stone, take hardly any exercise, and like a beer and glass of wine.

DS is now late 40’s, in a stressful job.

I worry very much about him, if DIL was into a healthier lifestyle it would be better, but what can you do or say without causing offence?

I look at the photos of him 30 years ago, this skinny lad…..,

[sigh]

In this age of plenty, we all have to walk a line between eating too much, becoming obese and all the practical and healthn problems this brings and eating enoogh of the right mix of foods to stay healthy and fit.

But not calorie counting all the time, when I eat out the last thing I think about is calorie count of what I am choosing. I work on the basis that my normal eating pattern can accommodate the occasional splurge.

At times like Christmas, I do not binge on food, but I know I will eat too much and put on some weight. If it hasn't gone naturally by the end of January, I will do the 5:2 diet for a couple of weeks. Then forget about it and eat nomally again.

I was in my teens in the 60s and it seemed that a lot of people were on a diet. My mum was on a constant diet and so was my MiL as well as friends.
I decided that I was a bit overweight so started what became a yo-yoing of my weight. It was a stupid thing to do as my weight at the time was under 8 stone and well within normal range.

I gave up dieting years ago and my weight has stayed the same. I am a few pounds over what I should be but the doctor told me it's better than my weight going up and down which is unhealthy.

I think you have put it well - better than me!

Calendargirl. Our daughter gained a lot of weight in her 30s. She was big on her wedding day and I know it upset her. She said she felt pressure to lose it for the day and it made her eat more. My husband used to say to me 'Tell her'. As if the poor girl didn't know!

Shortly afterwards she decided to do something about it. She lost four and a half stone. She went from size 18 to size 10. She did this by herself with no operations, injections, slimming clubs etc. She looked amazing and apart from a couple of pounds here and there, she has kept it off for over 20 years.

My first H spent a lot of our marriage telling how fat and unattractive I was. When I divorced him, I said I would NEVER diet again, and I never have. I'm a bit overweight, but ok with how I look. My second DH loved me as I was, until the day he died.
My friend was brain washed from early her teens by her stick thin mother, to watch her weight and diet. We are now in our 60s. She's always on a diet then binging. The saddest thing is she always looks lovely. However, the brain washing from her mother from an early age has done irreparable damage to her self esteem and how she perceives she looks. It's very sad.

It is a tyranny. and don’t get me started on low fat/diet/ substitutes. I curse every time I end up with the “ wrong” bottle of cola tonic water, or fruit squash because they look similar to the original.
I know proper diet coke is cheaper but I don’t care as I really only crave it 2 or 3 times a year with ice and a slice. 🥤

My mother did exactly the same to me, mumski. She was lucky enough to be able to eat whatever she wanted and stay thin, while I took after my dad's side of the family and can put weight on just by looking at a cream cake! To this day, I absolutely despise the way I look, to the extent that I refuse to be in photographs. My family joke that if I ever went missing, there would be no point in putting up posters, as there aren't any photos of me to put on them!

You must be so proud of your daughter Kate, and quite rightly so!
I have always been of the mind set to eat less and move more and being recently told that I was pre-type 2 diabetic I knew I had to do something about the extra pounds that I was lugging around. And it is working - steadily I admit but I am getting there through determination and portion control as well as getting out and about more.

I don not actively count calories. However, I do tend to have a look on the packaging to check calories on sweet things and sauce covered ready meals. On buying a tesco dine in, the cholocate pot had over 6oo calories! I chose lemon cheesecake with under 400 per portion.

Op I think you are right. I think the generation born in the lates 40s and into 50s counted calories and have kept a more stable weight/size than the following generations.

I think the availability of pre done food presents a problem too. These lunchtime meal deals with calorific sandwich fillers, a bag of crisps and a fizzy drink is seen as quite normal now

Thanks Kate.

I know, it must be them who decides to lose a bit of weight.

DIL has always been quite statuesque, but used to have a good figure.

When the GC were at primary and nursery school, she walked a lot back and forth two or three times a day, taking them.

When they started grammar school, that stopped, obviously.

And when the children were younger, they went cycling at weekends.

Now, it all seems to have stopped, if only they still exercised, but they don’t. Busy working lives, so much easier to sit about at weekends instead of getting out and ‘doing’ stuff. Plus I know they are tired after work.

DH and I do far more exercise than they do.

Janejudge I do agree. The ready availability of food as snacks or ready meals means that many people eat without thinking now.

My mother always watched her weight in a calm way. She'd never really draw attention but she would sometimes comment that she was cutting back because she'd put a little weight on. She made all her own clothes so perhaps needing to make new ones if she became overweight was both a chore and expensive.
I'm like her apart from one unhappy period in my mid 20s when I put on about a stone and a half. I was buying a next size up pair of jeans and realised I had to stop and lose weight. I used the F-plan diet, it comprised of calorie counting and eating fibre rich food which would fill you up. I lost the weight and I still remember many of the calorie calculations for various foods. I watch my weight now because it's unhealthy and I feel sluggish if I get heavier and I hate tight clothes.

I know we're not supposed to say anything now about weight or shape but I do wonder about so many young people who are what would have once been called overweight. I think they will suffer ill health though they will of course happily use the modern weight loss drugs.

Please be kind to yourself MissInterpreted. Life it definitely too short to make yourself feel bad about how you look.
Your family love you as you are. .

I’m the same, I had a piece of shortbread yesterday, it affected me for the rest of the, overwhelmed with guilt. I hate how I look, my body, my aging face with wrinkles and eye bags and never enjoy what I eat in case I put on weight.

Franski

I have noticed that it is pretty much the norm among my friends (borns 1960's) to watch our weight and be careful about food. I am the same. It struck me today that i rarely choose what i would like on a menu- but always what will stop me going over 2000 calories/day. It's not like i actually write it down or keep a log but i pretty much know through decades of this nonsense, what the calorie count if food is. I'm not skinny, just average. Not anorexic..but not carefree either. I feel like if I took the brakes off I would balloon. I have noticed my GDs are absolutely not bothered and happy to eat (a bit too much) and be happily chubby wearing all kinds of clothes that aren't flattering. Honestly I marvel at their joie de vivre and wonder why so many of my generation remain hung up on food- anyone got any thoughts on this?

I think weight must partially depend on one's genetics. Some people can eat and not gain, others must watch their intake. Some people only eat enough to sustain and others eat too much. Mystery.

I know we’re not supposed to say anything now about weight or shape

No, but I think of a friend who had steadily gained weight. When she finally realised that she had got quite fat, she decided to do something about it.

After she had lost some weight, she said to her DH, “Why didn’t you say how much weight I had gained?”

“I didn’t want to upset you” he said.

But she so wished he had!

Absolutely, Norah. As I said above, my mother could eat whatever she liked and not gain weight, while the women on my dad's side of the family could pile on the pounds very easily indeed. Unfortunately I take after the latter...

MissInterpreted

I was born in the 60s and honestly, I don't know anyone who lives like that. I have friends of all shapes and sizes and pretty much everyone eats what they want. Food is one of life's great pleasures and I just can't imagine living my life that way - even though I know I'm very much overweight and need to shed it. It seems just too much like control freak behaviour to me.

Me too.