Black Dogs 29

Hi all
Wyllow- what a lovely day today to do stuff in the garden. Power washing is great fun and it’s amazing on patios and paths. Bit messy but that’s part of the fun. I haven’t done it for a couple of years but keep hinting at DH - then I can have a go!!
Your day yesterday sounded busy but enjoyable- your Gym is a wonderful place for you. Glad you were able to formulate an E mail you felt satisfied with.
Doodle- it was a nice visit from DSS and DSGS . We don’t see DSGS often as he lives abroad so it was good to catch up with his news.
Glad you had an enjoyable time t Church and the hospice. Hasn’t the weather been beautiful.
HVDY- yes I was pleased with my hair - it’s fine but he always manages to make it look bette4 than it is.
We had Swiss rolls - strawberrry and cream and lemon curd and cream. Good old M and S.
I don’t think I could play dog at all- you are such a lovely Nan. I could have done years ago.!! Getting down is easy but getting up is a challenge. I talk cat like you - they are learning words a bit - like dinner and NO!!
Those baby squirrels must be so cute.
SweetPeaSue- hope you got to Docs today with DH. What a daft thing to say from the nurse about his bruising- it’s practically impossible to kick yourself in the leg!!
You did well to get to Book Club - your head must have felt mashed after that,
So right our lives are very short and some much shorter than others. We must make the most of each day as best we can.

Well,I had my Echo and the young m. Said he would send the report today to the Docs. So we,ll see when they contact me!!
Glad it’s done.
Love to all and have a peaceful nightx

Wyllow By the time I went to bed last night, my hips and knees were killing me from all the crawling around like a dog . I use baby talk with Jaffa, always tell him what a good/brave/clever boy he is. I bet your sister is the same with her dog. A good hairdresser is such a boon, particularly one who is so friendly and easy to get on with. Aww, newborn babies are so cute. Even better if they sleep well at night (mine never did).

I noticed something scampering about on the roof of the house opposite - we've occasionally seen a squirrel - but this was 4baby squirrels! They must be nesting in the loft. I hope nobody kills them (which is legal, as grey squirrels cannot be released into the wild). I'll mention it to the neighbour after the squirrels have all left (about 10 weeks). Hope everyone has a decent day, and best of luck for today to ScaredyCat x

Sorry, Scaredycat I always get the "e" in the wrong place.

Tomorrow is busy, CPN, well due, then cleaner/friend, we'll go outdoors and potter together in the garden and test all the electric stuff in the garage (Ex was into all the gear, and I'd like to learn how to use the power wash he had)

I think you need to keep taking photos of the same area, Sweetpeasue, it will be helpful. Especially with markings. And comparison with the other leg too.
As in “normal” - ie check out stuff like spider and varicose veins along side.
So what happened last year when they came and went - could it happen again?

Make sure the GP gets a photo:- can you email them it first thing to go with the requests?
I’m glad that DH got a call back at last and sad it wasn’t helpful. I’m crossing fingers and toes for you both the new meds have a good effect.

So what book are you discussing in the he book group? I do recall when you couldn't make yourself go. Small marks of progress, baby steps even if the next time is hard.

Yes, in the depths of depression sunny days were worse. Like looking through a thick glass at others out enjoying themselves - not envy, just a bridge too far to cross.

It has been sunny but oh so cold in the wind, Doodle. Thank goodness for the church, and the very open hospice. They understand. Your feelings about the funeral make perfect sense. Also - well, celebrating a life. when my sister (the one a year younger than me) died in 2019, the "do" afterwards was full of connections and comfort for the family, what others said.

I like the idea of playing “doggie” with LG! What fun! I expect you were a large friendly one. My sister is very attached to her dog and has a special dog language which makes me smile, this very grown up very adult behaved doctor doing baby talk with her Bella.

You get up so early! You are a whizz on Vinted. Ah,the blessing of being a grandma, mum can deal with the bath.

I had a lovely time at the gym. I took my time as I woke so tired, had a nice hot shower in the morning, but its funny, when I get into the gym I start thinning I cat do much then I do. Sparks of others? Nice haircut, good job this time, I adore my hairdresser. She is absolutely genuine, loves her work and loves many of the people. She said I have lots of mums and grans.
A long term staff member had brought her newborn in. Oh my, the wee toes and fingers, and a sleeper at night too.

I had MrA, or rather, how to deal with the new situation, on my mind, and ideas formed, and I wrote a simple email to the Safeguarding woman when I was enjoying a post gym sesh at Costa that brought a reply Zoom next week.

Glad about that., needs a very very suitable approach, maybe something will come out of it. She’s not really come back to me when she should have, so I clearly said the right things this time.

Holding Scardeycat in mind for tomorrow: and never forgotten, those not posting today.

ScaredyCat Hope you were pleased with your hair after having it done. Did the visit from your stepson and his son
go well? What cake did you have?
Wyllow3 Another BD at the hairdresser's today - a good cut always feels so nice. Did you get to the gym?
SweetpeaSue I didn't think it looked like Cellulitis (I had it in my legs, many years ago, then in my face6 years ago. I think you're correct about it being Venous Insufficiency. "kicked himself in the leg"???What a ridiculous thing for her to say! I hope the new tablet will help your husband. It's so wrong that you and many other people have to keep fighting for proper medical treatment. I hope your husband gets to see a GP tomorrow.
Doodle It's been windy here, too, but warm and sunny. You had a good day. Did you have lunch at the hospice? No, LG doesn't yet dress up, but she pretends to be a dog sometimes, and crawls about with her tongue out! We pat her on the head and say "Good doggy".

Busy day - awake at 5.30, up at 6.30, cleaned up and took Jaffa for his check-up. He's doing well, but they'll check him again in a week. Went to my neighbour's house and chatted for an hour. LG was here, 4-8pm. She played with the new toys I've bought (Vinted bargains). She refused to have a bath (not my place to insist so she just had a wash). Hope ALL BDers have a good sleep.

Doodle Oh I see now about that man's funeral and in many ways I see that its not as bad when he doesnt leave his other half behind and can be re -united again. Im glad you had a nice time at church and the hospice. The sun does help but I hate wind.
I know DHs leg isnt a bruise as he had exactly the same marking on both legs nearly a yr ago but he never went to the Drs about them. Hope we get in tomorrow. Sleep well.x

Evening all. Had a nice day at church and then spent the afternoon at the hospice. Very pleasant. Sunny but really windy outside.
Thanks Sweetpeasue the funeral was ok. Nice actually. I never feel so sad if it’s the second person to go as I think they will be reunited with their loved ones. This man’s wife died last month and he wants to be with her.
I think your DH’s leg looks more like a bruise. Has he been resting it on something at night? Certainly if it gets bigger I’d see the GP. Cardiac nurse was hopeless. So much for reassurance. Glad you went to book club, hope you enjoyed it.
Wyllow sun does lift the spirits. As does a haircut and natter. Hope you’re feeling a bit brighter now.
Scaredycat sounds like you have a fun day planned. Lots of chat and cake. Be nice to see your stepson and his son.
HVDY hope your Dh doesn’t have to wait long to be seen in urology. Hopefully they’re keeping an eye on him.
Hope Jaffas follow up was ok. Does your LG ever dress up in nurses uniform and tend to the sick. Our DGD did. 😊
Whiff I agree about the BhF forum. Such a good place for advice and information. I’ve used it a lot in th past.
Ellie Anne that sunset is beautiful. How lovely. I too find disagreements upsetting even if I’m not personally involved. Hope it gets resolved amicably. Unusual for this sort of thing in a Bible group

Doodle You managed so well at that funeral but it must have been quite a strain. I think the hymns can bring such overwhelming emotion when they're sung and so many of the words can bring comfort and reassurance. Not all funerals are religious of course- DILs mum's wasnt but the photos shown of her life were very poignant. Made me reflect on just how short our Ives actually are in the great scheme of things. Hope youve had a decent day and had company that I know helps you a lot.

ThankyouWyllow The sun does have the power to lift ones mood a little doesnt it- unless depression is really bad, then nothing breaks through. Hope the natter at hairdressers helped too , and the gym. Its true that seeing our plant/seeds grow give us a sense of nurturing and watering gives us a purpose too.
Scardycat What a good idea about drawing g around the shape. One sure way to know it its spreading or retreating. Oh what a lovely excuse-- I mean REASON to have cake .Do hope you enjoy your visit from stepson and son.

Rang cardiac dept where I thought cardiac nurse worked. No joy. So rang the Cardiologist's secretary to tell her we didnt get feedback from cardiac nurse in follow up. She got cardiac nurse to call back. DH received call and hardly got a word in edgeways. Hes to have a new heart medication and she said consultant doesnt think the pain in chest at rest is angina pain. I took phone from DH and told her the GT spray relieved it so it must be and that he gets it on exertion. Hes just to take new med and will be called again on 1st July.
When DH began to tell her of big patch o n leg she replied that hed probably kicked himself in his sleep! The call was no more than 2mins.

Went to book group and it was quite nice.

Will try to get in to GP tomorrow.
Just feeling tired and fed up of fighting .

Hope everyone else has gad a reasonable day. Love to all.x

Thankyou for your thoughts Whiff and HVDY
Ive seen cellulitis on my aunt's legs Whiff but no, DHs are not hot or painfull and no itching. Yes, blood thinners cause easily bruised skin but this isnt bruising as he had it once before in same area. When we told Rheumatologist he said to take a photo if he had it again. Thanks, I didnt know there was a forum on BHF.
HVDY Oh yoube got a busy day ahead- enjoy LG when she comes.
Thanks for replying. I dont believe its cellulitis for above reasons . Im thinking its Venous Insufficiency because of his Vascular problems with heart- angina-
Im afraid DH wont see anyone today and is waiting for the GP tomorrow. He hasn't any faith in the others though there is another one but shes not there either.

I miss the gym awfully when I don't go, its my lifeline to a social life since it became more complicated with Q's.

I thought "Cellulitis" too. Looks very like, but I appreciate it could be blood and blood problems of course

Oh, I would have paid the £25 too, HVDY. I was thinking the firms that slam on the "£60" now or you pay £100" lot. I know quite a few people who do their ironing Sunday morning listening to The Archers omnibus. busy day for you.

That is a lovely picture, EllieAnne. well I understand all too well how a conflict in small religious group can be so painful. Just hold in your mind - it wasn't you, others will be motivated to sort it out, just carry on going and keep any opinion to yourself.

If asked, just say how sad you feel about it and personally dont feel you can comment, it's too upsetting.

Sunny out. I am weary after the last few days, woke as in had enough of all this, life too wearying, but the sun has lifted my mood and I even got out first thing to water yesterdays plantings and pot a plant the gardener said was urgent.

But I have a haircut and natter much later at the gym so I will attempt some exercise with my body as well as my nattering.

Hi all
SweetPeaSue
I agree with others that your DH needs seeing asap. You could draw round the marks to see if it’s spreading - I had to do that last week when I scraped my leg. Thought it was good idea.
HVDY- make time for a little rest in between all those jobs. LG will be pleased to see you and full of beans I expect.
EllieAnne- that’s a beautiful photo. You live in a wonderful area. Sorry you were upset at the meeting- so many people don’t stop and think before they open their mouth. Not pleasant for those who have to hear it all. Take care Ellie Anne.
Doodle- you must be tired because not only do you do lots of nice social activities but use a lot of energy grieving inside.
Housework can wait - take time out to just sit on your balcony for awhile each day and let the peace wash over you.
Wyllow- what a lovely verse.
It’s amazing how the first light in the morning brings hope with it.
I,m off to the hairdressers in a minute for a cut and catch up on all the news. Then coffee with DH at M and S.
My Stepson is coming this afternoon with his grown up Son Who’s visiting from abroad. Better buy a cake!!
Love to allxxxx

EllieAnne Sorry you felt upset about the argument between others. Best to give a wide berth. Beautiful photo there. Hope all goes well for your trip to your son's.

SweetpeaSue My husband has been on Tamsulosin for many years, for his prostate. The symptoms are worse now, so he's being referred back to Urology. I don't like the look of your husband's leg. I'm not sure it's Cellulitis (which can be extremely serious). Is it hot to the touch? I think a doctor should see him today Sad about your aunt.
Doodle Jaffa's doing very well. He's got a check-up at 4, so I hope things will be ok. Re the lack of energy - I know what you mean. Could you get a cleaner/ironing lady? Glad you got the mobile banking sorted out. Are you going out today?
Wyllow3 It was a council car park at the leisure centre. My husband said to pay it (£25 if paid within 14 days, £60 otherwise), so I have. No wonder you felt worn out - you did a lot of weeding there. The time goes quicker when we're chatting or enjoying something. I ironed about 20 items last night whilst listening to music on my headphones.

Busy day today - shopping, cleaning, vet, LG here at 4, so making dinner to include her, then bathing her before she goes at 8pm. Hope ALL BDers manage to have a decent day x

Sweetpeasue has the mark on your husband's leg spread ,does it feel hot to the touch and is it painful?

I fell into my wall twice a year apart . Just thought the mark was odd because I was on blood thinners. It was on my shin only when it spread did I see my GP and it was cellulitis and needed antibiotics. I didn't realise cellulitis could be serious. It was the other leg the second time but I knew what it was so got help before it spread.

Earlier this year had mystery mark on the back of my left leg that looks like your husband's saw GP she couldn't decide what it was but prescribed antibiotics and it cleared up .

Being on heart medication especially blood thinners you have to be more aware of changes to your skin . Cuts and bruises are worse and don't heal as quickly. Plus I can't eat anything crunchy as they give me blood blisters in my mouth .They don't hurt but feel weird and look black . They go on their own .

BHF has a forum for all things heart related . It's like GN you use a username but for me it's been very helpful and hopefully helped in return . People's personal experiences I have found help more as it's warts and all. No idea if this helps .

https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202604/medium-59stus-1000015398.jpg https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202604/medium-42d4si-1000015397.jpg

Wyllow Actually the talk with British Heart Foundation cardiac nurse just enforced my thoughts that DH needed some help. She didnt think the 'follow up' from cardiac nurse ,who didnt come back to us, was any help at all.
Just, in case anyone thinks Im over reacting, which Im sure they dont, Im sharing the photo of DHs leg.

EllieAnne Its really upsetting listening to such passionate disagreements with those who you are familiar with. ( I think it happens frequently with clashes about interpretations of bible verses ect)
Its such a shame you cant share your feelings with your DH. Not sure if its any consolation but I certainly cant share any religious views with my DH either.
Such a lovely photo - thankyou for sharing.

There was a big disagreement between two people at my bible group last night which has upset me a lot. People have apologised on our group chat but one lady said she is taking a break.
Obviously I can’t share with Dh so it’s all going round in my head.
There one divorced lady but the rest are all couples so they could go home and talk it over.
Feel very tired and low.
Don’t want to drink tonight as I m driving to s1 first thing tomorrow.
Posting a photo of our lovely sunset last night. I didn’t take it. Someone posted it on Facebook.

Oh, curses re the parking ticket, HVDY 6 inches sounds rather mean to say the least. Was it council or one of those wretched big firms that you can never appeal of get in touch with? Council fine can often be appealed, I’d try if you have a blue badge, good reasons to ask for lifting the fine.
I hope DH gets any help he needs. Older blokes do have specific problems.

I’m just glad that you got to see the right people to sort out suitable medication, Whiff. Great to find something that works- and be trusted to use it properly and up it yourself.
You travel far more than I could cope with, but cope admirably at home. I have a cleaner too, I haven’t the mental oomph as well as the physical for the heavy stuff - it would take up all my available energy., and would stop me going out and be with people.

You’ve got some footie clashes there, Scaredycat. There are probably bound to be with a big family network.
I can understand the not crying for you - overload..and just koko for a long time.

Was the British heart foundation helpful? At all reassuring, *Sweetpeasue? It was bitter, especially near the East Coast, you did well to get out at all. And if slightly reassured, it IS worth waiting for a trusted GP.
Energy - well, it’s physical and mental, isn’t it, particularly doing certain things. Pushing the boat out here - can you get a cleaner - ££ - it’s so lovely and cheers one up to be tidy and clean. And then any energy left, well, thats for more enjoyable things. Like for me the gym and other bits of walking or even that cycle ride on a good day - if I cleaned as well that would be it.

I hope your little Sweetpeas thrive.

Isn’t it nice when you get kind help for these techie matters. More “the kindness of strangers”, Doodle? I’m not surprised you are tired - its a bit of a conflict for you..needing to be with friends….human contact, quite a lot after your loss, but it can be hard work too, and the inner fight to koko bearing the loss is tiring.

Lets face it, depression or variants of it is hard work in tough times. Good things aren’t taken for granted, they often have to be worked at.

I did have a lovely time with my Gardenner, though. OK, I did 2.5 hours weeding I never would have if we hadn’t done a lot of nattering. We also got closer as people - we share many values, and she is very MH aware so I get safe to disclose for the first time and we talked about a friend she was trying to help. See the picture and her alternative red hair at age 40 is part of the giveaway. Not conventional.

But totally knackered..long sleep in the afternoon, and back to bed now to be cosy and listen to music. I’d say my good fortune to respond to classical (as well as world music, but classical reaches the innards) is something that sustains me unless I’m very ill. Radio 3 unwind is on most of the day, it’s mostly classical music but some ambient stuff, but punctuated by little bits of well being chat, and even advice.

This is my current fave classical piece, “as steals the morn” - its from Handel and the poet Milton, but is basically about how night fears and fantasies are soothed by the coming of the light of day

www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jnt-wNEDek&list=RD1jnt-wNEDek&start_radio=1

“As steals the morn upon the night
And melts the shades away:
So Truth does Fancy's charm dissolve
And rising Reason puts to flight
The fumes that did the mind involve
Restoring intellectual day”

(Lecture over for the day) 🙄

HVDY poor Jaffa I feel so sorry for him but know that he will be tenderly cared for by his lovely mum. Hope you get DH’s appointment sorted out.
Sweetpeasue dint take DH’s comments to heart. When people are not feeling great they sometimes say things they don’t mean. I hope you get to talk to someone about his ankles.
wyllow it’s lovely you get on with your ex now. A comfort for you both I imagine and your children.
Oh Whiff what a wonderful post from you. Thanks for telling us all your news. What a dreadful time you’ve had. So pleased things are more in control now. Your choir sounds good and you’re enjoying your travels again. So good to hear from you.
Scaredycat I, tired all the time. No energy at all. I used to get up and clean the whole place in one day then go for a walk and do washing and ironing. Now if I do 10 minutes work I have to sit down. Part of it I think is enthusiasm. When I was doing things for us it gave me a point now I’m not really bothered anymore and it’s a chore.
Spent all afternoon trying to sort out my mobile banking. Very nice lady with no less patience helped me. Hope you’ve had a good day. Thinking of you
Purplepixie what lovely colour wool. Hope it knots up well,

HVDY Oooh that parking ticket must have made you so mad- just a few inches over, grrrr. Jaffa is a character isnt he. Fancy being able to eat so well after the tooth extractions. Glad your DH is being investigated. .y DH also went to Urologist a few yrs ago as hes had trouble too. Everything is OK at present.
Thanks, I did speak to a Cardiac nurse ,though not the one that followed up on DHs procedure and didnt come back. The British Heart Foundation had someone for me to talk to. She thinks DH needs some advice from the Cardiac nurse or Consultant who did procedure.
Scardycat Lovely words to us all. Just hope you get some reassuring news on Thursday( hope Ive got that right). You must get so tired with the AF yet you still press on and seize each day. Yes it was really sad to see my aunt ,though she cheered up a lot when I showed her our lamb photos.
Wyllow I hate getting up too early. I just dont seem able to rouse myself any earlier than half past 8 and it then takes me ages to 'come round' probably due to the Amitriptyline and occasional painkillers. My Sweetpeas are in the ground now but are only 5 or 6 inches high and seem a little straggly. Putting off trying to crouch over and tie them up to the bigger canes, it will hurt!
Glad youve had a nice talk with your ex.
Doodle How are you today? Good you never had any side effects from the covid jab. I rang and spoke to a Cardiac nurse from The British Heart Foundation and DH spoke to her too. The GP we like isn't on till Thursday so we hope to get appt then. I expect taken photos of the leg , just in case it starts to disappear ( the purple stain I mean).
The Rapid Access Chest Clinic , which is where DH first saw that Carfiac nurse who was meant to be following him up , doesnt have a dept number as its only GP new referrals. DH found the phone call from her in his phone history so going to try and ring that number tomorrow but I dont think we'll get through.

Have been low today but we had a walk along the sea front. It wS absolutely bitter though we managed a mile, but DH got tight chest again.
I think what shocked me about aunt yesterday was that I knew her DD had just had a GC ( her DD is in same hospital) and she'd shown photos of the new born baby ( my aunt's great DGD). When Id congratulated aunt on being a Great Grandmother again she was shocked and could hardly believe her DGD was in the new mother's unit . She had absolutely no recollection of her DD telling her the day before. Its quite frightening to see how quickly one can deteriorate with Dementia.

Hoping all have a peaceful night. Love to all and those not in right now.

Purplepixie That sweater looks quite complicated - is that a cable pattern in it? I love the colour you intend to knit it with. Im so sorry you're missing your close friend so much . She must have been so good to talk to and share things with. Not everyone manages to make those special friends. Hope your heart is a bit lighter today.
Whiff So lovely to see you in. Sounds like youve had quite a difficult time of it. My DH saw a consultant like that, after a suspected TIA , a few yrs ago. He was told it had probably been a migraine too. DH has never had migraines and still doesnt. So glad you have some more trips to look forward yo. You have such a great spirit, you're inspirational.

Back soon.

Whiff You've been through so much in your life, yet you always stay strong and positive. I'm glad you're still getting out and about and enjoying things.

ScaredyCat What a football-loving family you all are! My aqua aerobics friend goes to every Nottingham Forest match, both at home and away (she's been abroad a few times this year). Jaffa was very brave yesterday. He always walks into his carrier with no problem at all, and he sits quietly every time (although on the odd occasion that he meows, his voice is very quiet). My husband isn't going out for a drink with Son1 tonight, but he's gone there to help fix another problem with Son's car. What a shame your husband's friend had to cancel his birthday celebrations. Will he be able to arrange something later?

It brightened up and warmed up this afternoon, so I got some washing dry (I don't know how 2 of us generate so much washing). I'm going to do some ironing now. Love to all x

Hi all
PurplePixie- you gave your DH something to think about - sarcasm is so belittling and cruel.
Love that wool colour - look forward to seeing the jumper when it’s finished.
EllieAnne- I can’t cry either- haven’t been able to since Mum died- a long while now.
But yours is different - you,ve stifled your emotions so much because of your DH that they are almost buried.
I wish you could have a happier life. I so feel for you.
Doodle- it must have been difficult for you at the funeral you coped so well. They are never easy are they.
I, m sorry you feel so tired as well. Where did all our energy go?
HVDY- my friends DH supports Chelsea as does my GD3 Boyfriend. DD ,SiL and GD3 support Notts Forest! And have done for years. DH and sons are for Leeds and myDS and I love Man City from our time living there,A big footie family.
Glad to hear DH is feeling better- DH friend and wife had it last week and had to cancel his 60th Birthday bash. I hope he gets his appt soon.
Our cats are family aren’t they.I love ours so much - they have filled our house with fun ….. and fur!!! Jaffa sure can eat - what a brave boy.
SweetPeaSue. Oh your poor little Aunt. She must have looked so vulnerable and scared. So upsetting for you - you love her a lot don’t you.
I hope you,ve been able to contact somebody about your DH today. His symptoms sound worrying. I expect he was worried and a bit scared. I get a bit grumpy sometimes if I have
a worry .
Bet you,ve been busy washing too after the hols.
Make sure you look after yourself too.
Wyllow. You are right my friends DH is interested in Many things and has a pile of study books in his room!!!
It’s lovely how you and your first DH are such friends now. He’s made an effort to help himself and it’s been very worthwhile. You have your family and it must be good to share memories and news.
Enjoy your garden day. The plants will look pretty in pots. Red is a cheery colour in the garden.
Whiff- How good to see you. We,ve missed you.
What a time you have had but you battle on and have such positivity and hope . You set us all an example of how to make the best of our days whenever possible.

Love to all those mentioned and those we will always miss.