Downsizing

ariadne good luck with your house sale. I was like your husband..We'd made up our mind to move so I wanted to be off! Things are moving again especially in SE England. We went on the market in Jan and moved in July which is average for SE I am told. Fingers crossed for you!

My DH says visitors are like fish - they go off after 3 days.

Ah teddymac what a decision. In the end you have to take in all your factors. I moved 3 miles at 71 and it was a lot of work on my own but I have an overlap of friends and activities which meant it wasn't a wrench. You liked the house. I have moved so many times I can't remember. Now I have a small bungalow, lounge, bedroom off, kitchen, shower room and tiny garden. It is quiet just birds and horses clip clopping by, no traffic and I love it. It felt like home immediately but I dithered when the offer came. My daughter couldn't understand why I hesitated but I knew it would be my last move probably. I do envy folk in big places. Heating is the dearest thing wherever now. Water, bt, tv, car, etc. the same. But I think if one thing is dearer at the new place you spend less on something else. Priorities. Be near your interests as that is what you need when older and on your own. The family can always travel as they are younger. You do just narrow down to what you can't live without. Go by your gut feeling when you first wake up in the morning before your head kicks in and thinks.

Ah Ariadne DH needs to be more philosophical, 'what will be will be' I do believe if things are 'meant' they happen and if they don't something else 'will turn up' Never push things hard, let things happen.

My daughter sells houses and is top sales for the country, she can sell fridges to eskimos, she sold me a dinner service she had just bought, because she saw a nicer one, at the price she paid for it and I gave her most of the large plates and bowls back as on my own in a bedsit I would never use them

Oh dear Ariadne. Houses are moving so slowly at the moment and some take more than 9 months. Members of my family have moved into rented accommodation and rented their own houses out to enable them to move. I hope he cheers up soon

Just need to unload here! DH is still sunk in depression because the house hasn't sold. It's been on the market for exactly three weeks! I cannot get through to him that we are doing nothing wrong, that 10 viewings is good, and that we have to be patient. I think it's the realisation that it's out of his control, but bless him, I do wish he'd lighten up a bit. He is normally a jovial, happy guy. Thank heavens Wateraid, Rotary and the local Young Offenders Institute are keeping him busy.

Thank you for listening!

We moved from a 4bed semi not in a good area to a 2 bed semi in a better area nearer to kids and my brother and OH's golf course.. sods law the golf course closed not long after we moved but he's now taken up bowls.., I love the fact that the house is quick and easy to look after, and we have one spare bedroom when my son who lives abroad or various friends want to spend a few nights but it also doubles as my hobby room/computer/sewing etc. Our kitchen/diner is only big enough to sit 4/5 at most and its a bit of a squash but honestly I am glad I don't have room for big family get togethers anymore , we usually gather at my eldest daughters and we all pitch in and help.

I would like a conservatory to sit and relax without the noise of tv (OH watches lots that I don't) but I'm quite happy to be upstairs in the spare room online or reading.. maybe one day we'll afford the conservatory.

There is a Chinese saying "Guests and fish stink after three days"

I often wonder , when I've been on holiday, why I have to have so much room and junk and clutter in my home the rest of the time. What I'd love to do [garden not big enough, though], is to get my house all clean and tidy and shipshape, then move into a caravan in the garden and only have to clean and tidy that. In my youth I lived in a caravan for a while, and I loved it!

Yes, that is just about long enough - and it is good to get your home back. Likewise, I think the best part of holidaying is arriving back to the comfort of your own home, but then I am not adventurous at all.

I find that although having visitors is quite hard work, we do enjoy having them and because we've been about a bit it almost feels as though we've had a holiday. It lifts us out of our day to day life. I agree though about the departure and that should usually come within 3 to 4 days!!

But if you really enjoy it then it is worth the effort isn't it. We have two lovely friends coming to stay shortly, and it will be a joy to have them here, but it will also be lovely when they have gone. We don't make any 'end' date to their stay, we all know when we have had enough. and the will say 'Oh! we'll go home tomorrow, if that is o.k. with you' It is of course a long-standing friendship.

PRINTMISS I'm not that clever or energetic really but just happen to have been a professional cook most of my days. This makes the catering much easier for someone like me.
Last Christmas it was 13. I have to admit though that it takes me a few days to recover!!

gangy5 how lovely to still have the energy to entertain 11 people! The thought just wears me out. The most we can accommodate is 8, and after that I need to have a lie down.

We did want to have room to entertain all the family to meals - 11 of us and have a lovely big lounge/diner in our flat. merlotgran I can sympathise with your open plan vision and if I hadn't to worry about finances I would try to find a plot of land on which to build a green oak style barn so that the main portion could be open plan. It wouldn't have to be excessively large and perhaps could be insulated well so as to be cheapish to heat.
If you think that you can convert your current home to something near as you would like - it would probably be the cheapest option. Go for it!!

We downsized from a four bedroom family home with a large garden, and a large double garage/workshop, to a 'Park Home'. Our friends thought we were mad, but I had always wanted to live in a Park Home, I liked the idea of being sort of 'detached' but close.
We not only downsized, but moved out of the area we had lived in for 50 years with many good friends, but we were only an hours drive away, and have kept in touch (that was 10 years ago). My daughter who only lived 20 minutes away from us at that time, was a little upset, but since she has a pressurised job, we saw very little of them, their weekends were taken up with family things, as they should be. People seem to get the impression that we are a close family, so perhaps that is so, without actually getting together.
We had a house full of clutter, we had colleceted both my mother-in-laws and my mums bits and pieces, apart from our own accumulations, and having done both those clear outs, I knew how distressing that could be, so I decided that I did not want my daughter to go through all that. She was asked to choose what she wanted, the rest we sent to auction/charity shops, some things I wish I had kept, but these would only have been put away, so really did not need to be kept. Memories and photographs are lovely, and we have spent a lot of time putting cinefilms on to dvd.
I am of course lucky I have a rather garrulous, out-going husband and we have joned the local bowls club, and of course we live in a very close community on the park. Our home came with a small garden and a garage.
We moved when we were in our 70's.

Downsizing often means making improvements to old (or not so old) properties and we often wonder whether we should have knocked down a couple of walls to make our property more open plan. We spent last Christmas with our children and grandchildren in a converted barn in Devon and were so taken with the design we had to resist the temptation to pick up a sledgehammer as soon as we returned home.

One thing that puts me off open plan living is the ever increasing cost of heating. The woodburner in our sitting room does a great job keeping us warm and cosy but would not be enough to heat a much larger area. There would also be a lack of privacy for visitors as our quite large dining room doubles up as a spare room. I really can't make up my mind.

What do other gransnetters think?

We downsized from a large three bed detached in essex to a medium sized three bed semi in North Yorkshire -not good - we fell over each other all the time, the villagers hated us and we felt very isolated and a long way from family. So we came down to the East Midlands, got a larger house a new 4 bed detached for a quite a bit less money put on a conservatory and now we have more space and can give each other elbow room. We love the town and are nearer our families. If I was left alone though I would definitely get a nice new two bed flat in Cambridge and a sports car.

P.S I would just like to add that we only moved threequarters of a mile from our old house. Sometimes it is not helpful to move near to siblings as this can be a disappointment - they lead very busy lives and may not beable to give the time to you that you expected.

Downsizing before you're past it is a very good idea. It's very traumatic the older you get so my advice is to do it sooner rather than later. We did it at the early age of 60 because we wanted to stop working and to beable to pay off the mortgage. All of our family say that we were very sensible and look on in envy - ones who now are older and contemplating what to do.
The big plus of doing this is having a good sort out of all your possessions and drastically cutting them down.
We've always loved our outdoor space so looked for a garden flat. We are extremely happy with our situation and released a good chunk of capital with which to enjoy life as neither of us have an occupational pension.

I moved to release some cash and get some peace and quiet out of Oxford - but I upsized - unintentionally, I just liked the house!

I'd like to downsize but my house is a sort of 'second size up' property. If I sold it I would have to buy a house that would be a quarter of the size but would probably only be @ £50,000 less. By the time I'd paid for removal costs, solicitors fee's etc I wouldn't make much money, and I'd have to do up another property to my taste. If I moved to the next vilage to be closer to my daughter I'd have to pay a lot more for a property. It's well insulated, reasonably well maintained, and the neighbours are lovely as well. So, what I'm doing at the moment is tidying it up so it would be ready to sell if necessary, but I can enjoy living in it [I'd hate to spend money on it doing it up just to put on the market]. Mind you, sometimes I'd like to go home to a different house and have that 'being on holiday' feeling. And I've always wanted to live in a cottage, although I sometimes find old properties a bit spooky. Difficult decision to make, isn't it.

We too are waiting to move - hopefully at the end of the month. We have had a major de-clutter and have tried very hard to recycle as much as we can - I'm feeling very green as a result! Just the garden shed to have a second look at - DH did the first session on it and I just know he will have missed more of what I call "rubbish" and he calls "important accessories".

We are moving to a smaller house and I am determined to keep it clutter free. The removers are going to pack what we can't manage and that will be a big help. I'm not looking forward to the whole process though and will be very glad when we are actually installed!

It's just so stressful waiting for the actual completion date to be agreed and we only have a chain of 4! Must be he**ish with a longer one!

It is a very stressful time..our moving date moved several times but we made it!! The sorting and trips to charity shops, tips and evenings on freecycle kept me distracted!

Ariadne know what you mean - waiting is the worst, not sure how much to sort out and get rid of, trying to work out in my mind where I am going to put all my crafting goodies, whether to order the shed yet. Keep telling myself if it is meant to happen it will!!

PennySue tell me about it! The clear out, I mean. We've done it, and are now waiting...