Update:
Oh boy, what a morning. The static caravan (mobile home if you're posh) arrived at 9.30. Four burly men arrived with it - much to my relief as my caravan shoving days are well and truly over (not that they ever began.) Backing the low-loader into position went well and the caravan was unloaded safely but then the lorry got stuck due to heavy rain earlier this week. Don't ask me how I managed to tow it out with my 4x4 but the Gods were with me!
DGS then decided to throw a teenage strop because nobody was available to drive him into town to meet his mates. His younger brother, helpful as ever, handed round coffee and biscuits while DH grumbled that if the lorry driver had listened to him he wouldn't have got stuck in the first place 
Our four Polish friends (Yes, UKIP) finally drove off with big smiles on their faces which could probably be explained by the big tip (from me) and four half bottles of Vodka (from clever DD). If you want a good job done, women resort to flattery bribery. 
The family moves into the caravan in a fortnight and from then on I think my motto will be, Keep Calm and Bake Cake!