Where to live?! HELP!!!

I'm just thinking out loud here - not criticising, merely observing.

From varying threads on differing subjects, many grans seem to live their lives solely for the benefit of their children and GC.

vwaves it's quite a geographical triangle for you to negotiate! You can't be all things to all people, sandwiched as you are between the generations.

Say you moved to the Midlands so half-way between parents and your DC's families, that would still involve an awful lot of driving to visit various people. If you want to continue with nursery pick-ups etc. you are going to have to stay near Warrington.

Had to look Warrington up on the map! Sorry, v ignorant? Can I ask why you feel the need to settle down permanently? Personally I would go on renting - or buy if that works better- and just look on this as a phase of my life. Things change all the time. And consider trains rather than that horrible drive. My sympathies on that one!

My daughter lives in a suburb of Warrington (Thelwall) but mainly because of her and her husband's jobs having moved there from Cambridge three years ago. We go to very pretty places when we visit usually Knutsford, Stockton Heath and Lymm. I have another daughter in Ipswich and a Sister in Colchester so we live in the middle (Leicestershire)just off the A1. Property prices are good, the countryside is nice and larger towns/cities accessible by public transport - it was a compromise we are glad we made.

I am not far from you in North Staffs, personally I would find somewhere between North Wales and Warrington, lots of lovely areas to explore. Have you considered The Wirral coast especially the side with views across to North Wales, and there are fast roads to take you to either Warrington or North Wales. I live about an hours drive from my GD and find it is still doable to help.
Alternatively lots of lovely places and villages round Chester, Knutsford etc.

Could you wait until the children are at school and then move to Sussex?Your aging parents will need you more than the children will, and you could find somewhere near the coast?Sussex is lovely, I would be happy to live there somewhere.
Then, as time goes by, if you need to help out, either in Wales or Warrington, due to your DD's health you could get a train there for a week.This is what a good friend of ours does.

Mmm but parents won't be there forever and then OPs children will find themselves doing the horrible journey to her. Having done long journeys to support parents and in laws in time of need, that isn't something I'd want for my children.

Well, somebody will have to be doing the travelling, and it shouldn't really be the older person doing it.The other thing is to find a really nice place to live.

Could the aging parents move to the Warrington/Wales area too?

Your daughter seems to be the one with the most immediate need of your help, so staying near her for at least a year or two, maybe still renting, could be best.

I must be more selfish than most people because I don't see why you have to move at all. You have a life of your own. Live where you feel happiest. Visit your children and even stay with them occasionally but don't put your life on hold for them. The same goes for your parents. I'm not suggesting you ignore them completely but why do you have to be available close at hand.

Like farnorth I also think that your daughter is the one with the most immediate need and I would therefore concentrate on areas closer to her. Have you thought of looking at the lovely villages just south of Warrington, just off the M56/A56. That way you wouldn't have so far to travel if your daughter needed assistance and, it is also ideal for you and your son to visit each other, straight up the M56. Obviously this leaves your aging parents out of the equation but it is impossible for you to be near everyone and, as jayanna said, you could look into using the train to visit them.

Have you sold the Cornwall house?

It would take an awful lot to make me move from Cornwall to Warrington!!

I understand your reservations about all the driving. I've been in that position, living close to my elderly mother but with children and grandchildren three hours north and south.

Fortunately we live in the middle of the distance between them but it's still a long way to go.

There hasn't been much mention of the parents. Do they own their own home? Are they already infirm?

I think they might feel abandoned if you move so far away. I don't think I could have done that to my mother.

I'm with vampirequeen on this. Live where you feel happiest & visit daughter and parents. There's no guarantee that either they won't move at some point anyway

Thanks everyone. It seems the majority opinion is to be near daughter whilst she needs me but looking at it as temporary is an idea. I can stay with my parents so probably better to do that when needed.
I still miss Cornwall. I did sell and went back to Sussex then sold that (long story) so money sitting in the bank.
Hmmmm.
I must say it is nice to get all your input. Thanks everyone
Anyone live near Warrington I could do with making a couple of friends. I have been to a nice meet up and Bookgroup but takes ages in such a big place to meet someone just to have a natter with

Two of the 14 replies indicated staying near your daughter, not a majority!

The majority, including me, thought you should put your own needs first, or were non-committal.

At least having sold your property and now renting, you have choices.

It is very nice around there, but have you seen the prices of the houses near Knutsford!!! I just feel you have to be cautious about moving permanently. What happens if your daughter and family have to move because of work?

No annoyingly they would never move!

I did wonder about that!

Interesting. I did think this year I needed to consider my own needs. It is so tricky though.

So true about them both possibly moving/dying!

I must explore the Wirral coast

You can't possible ask us where you should live ...everyone will give you a different answer you have to live where your heart tells you to live