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House and home

Overstaying lodger!

(480 Posts)
Anniechip Fri 09-Feb-18 22:10:26

Hi everyone,
I don't post very much but always read the very interesting topics, such great advice on many things, which leads me to this topic.
8 or 9 years ago my husband met a young lady through work. She is the same age as our DD- 36. They (DH and female) are both big rugby and football fans so had a lot in common. She started coming round to watch matches, stopping for tea etc chatting about this and that. A nice enough person who I chatted to about cooking,holidays etc general life 'stuff'! Her family live away but she has a very large social circle.
Last March she told us that she was going to have to move out of her rented house that she shared with another female as the owner had sold up. She had a month to find somewhere alternative. We live in a 3 bed terrace, both our children have families and houses of their own.
DH asked me if she could move in with us 'for a few weeks' until she found somewhere.
Reluctantly I agreed but really wanted to say no, I felt under pressure as she was having no luck finding anything.
12 months previous to this our DD, her husband and 15 month old who had been living with us for 18 months, saving for their own place, had moved out and I was just about getting my house back to what I wanted it to be.
So....... The lodger moved in lock stock and barrel.
I had to empty a large wardrobe in my second bedroom, clear 2 kitchen cupboards and fridge and freezer space.
We agreed on a rent of £300 a calendar month.
Now she is becoming far too comfortable and complacent.
Leaves washing in the machine for a couple of days or on my dryer in the back room, coats over dining chairs, shoes in the hallway, dishes in the sink for a couple of hours, etc etc.
Now I feel it's time she was moving on. My dGC like to have sleepovers but have to sleep on an air bed in our room instead of a nice comfy bed in their own little room.
The back room is my 'office' so no room for a bed.
I want my own space back but unfortunately my husband sees no wrong. If anything his life has been enriched as night after night they sit and watch sport and chat endlessly. I end up in the dining room or upstairs in bed!
AIBU to say it's time now? I want my house back!!
DH doesn't think there is a problem and says we need the money- he was made redundant in June after 18 years in the same job, but has since found another so we are both still earning.
I would willingly give up the £300 a month to have my life and house back! Any ideas on how to get rid?!

Oldwoman70 Tue 27-Mar-18 12:11:12

Once she has gone have a long chat with your DH and tell him if he ever puts you in that situation again you WILL make him bleed! grin

varian Tue 27-Mar-18 12:04:44

I hope you've got the locksmith booked to change the locks as soon as she's gone.

mcem Tue 27-Mar-18 12:00:53

Who needs The Archers or Corrie when we have this ongoing saga.
Great progress! We're waiting for the happy ending when the goody triumphs!
If we synchronise the round of applause we could be heard country-wide.

toscalily Tue 27-Mar-18 11:57:31

Oops! flowers

toscalily Tue 27-Mar-18 11:55:27

This really has caused a stir, 16 pages, is this a record? Think we are all on tenterhooks waiting for Friday. Well done Annichip and I hope you have a lovely Easter with your family. (flowers)

FarNorth Tue 27-Mar-18 11:05:33

gringringrin
I'm feeling good about this so you must be totally ecstatic!!!

Try not to do yourself a mischief, leaping about with joy when she has exited the building!!

grannyactivist Mon 26-Mar-18 21:56:42

I've usually been sad to see my lodgers go, but I can absolutely understand why you would be very glad indeed to see the back of yours! Hopefully your husband will have learned something from this escapade and will be glad to see you in high spirits again. wink

fiorentina51 Mon 26-Mar-18 21:54:50

Crate of champagne chilling, bunting ready, streamers, poppers, food, flowers and Dagenham Girls Pipe band on standby. Just say the word and we'll be outside your front door! ?

Chewbacca Mon 26-Mar-18 21:51:04

grin Anniechip. This is decluttering on a monumental scale!

Luckygirl Mon 26-Mar-18 21:48:17

Hoo-blooming-ray!! Goodbye!!!

Anniechip Mon 26-Mar-18 21:41:31

The exodus has started my friends! She has moved some stuff out already and has asked if she can borrow a suitcase! She can keep it never mind borrow it if it means Goodbye!!’
I am on the verge of mild or severe hysteria as Good Friday draws ever closer!! Can’t quite believe it’s happening. 4 more sleeps!! ?! X

SpringyChicken Sun 25-Mar-18 22:31:28

I shall crack open the wine on Friday and celebrate on your behalf. Any excuse...! Do tell us when she's actually gone.

seacliff Sun 25-Mar-18 22:18:06

Fantastic....it will be so different for you when she's gone!

Chewbacca Sun 25-Mar-18 21:45:05

winewinewine and plenty of it to celebrate!

NotAGran55 Sun 25-Mar-18 21:27:11

Wonderful news !

M0nica Sun 25-Mar-18 21:26:16

sunshine

tanith Sun 25-Mar-18 21:25:23

I hope you have flags and trumpets at the ready to give her a rousing send off on Friday ?????

Anniechip Sun 25-Mar-18 21:01:38

Hi sea cliff
Yes yes yes!!! She started packing stuff up yesterday and asked me if she could borrow some big plastic boxes I had conveniently emptied- just in case!!!! Also cancelled the direct debit too. So.. finally... it’s happening!!
Thank you for asking and once again thanks to everyone who offered suggestions offers of removal and lots of great advice! Xx

seacliff Sun 25-Mar-18 20:27:00

Not long now. Is she showing signs of packing?

Jools1953 Fri 23-Mar-18 00:39:42

I’m delighted to see she’s going, I hadn’t read the whole thread.

Jools1953 Fri 23-Mar-18 00:36:54

It’s a pity that your husband isn’t backing you on this, but she’s definitely outstayed her welcome. She’s treating your home as if it’s her own - and I’d be furious about the washing left now the machine - dump it in her bedroom next time she does it, maybe? - but she’s got to go!

Time you had a chat with her and said time to go, and give her a month’s notice.

Niobe Thu 22-Mar-18 21:44:57

Why do I feel that the husband needs a kick up the backside too? If mine behaved as this guy did I would have administered one long ago!

Bathsheba Thu 22-Mar-18 16:47:18

Oh that is fabulous news Annie. Easter eggs? Who needs Easter eggs when you get the best Easter present ever - your house back (not to mention your husband!!!)

Well done. Give yourself a pat on the back and have a large glass of wine

luluaugust Thu 22-Mar-18 16:25:23

What a relief - great

Madgran77 Thu 22-Mar-18 15:54:29

Brilliant!