GRANNY ANNEX

Yes M0nica This is something I have also thought about for my future. It is quite popular in a couple of the surrounding towns and villages not to far from here.
It was also in the back of mind that I could have my name on a list as a safety barrier should anything go wrong if I went in with my son..

Through examples left on here by the kind Gransnetters I have a much clearer list of pros and cons from my original question.
Next step for me to get some legal advise
Thankyou everyone for your input here

Some retirement flat developments offer flats to let as well as buy. You could then have the whole value of your house in your savings. The downside of this is that having a very large sum in savings may disbar you from receiving some benefits that a low income from job or pension entitles you to.

Bluebelle No not at all! I have no wish for my son to be a carer for me. I wouldnt want that at all and neither would he. I couldnt think of a worse carer to have tbh!! I think I may have put this over in the wrong way, but really what I meant was it would be nice to have someone there for the odd DIY or to run me somewhere etc if I can no longer drive. I have no other expectations. At the moment my son is more dependant on me than I am on him and I hope it stays that way for a long time
However, should we join up I would be giving my son everything I have worked for all my life and financially he would be willing to take on most of my bills connected to the home.

Thankyou Craftyone. As we grow older and start thinking about our tomorrows there is always the worry of future health and fitness. Although I am independent now, and reasonably fit and able, I am already starting to restrict myself with the driving after dark, and over the past year I have been looking at different avenues for my move to be on a bus route and nearer to a town. I would be very isolated in this village if I could not get out with my friends.
Financially I have very little choice in where I move to if I am to stay near by. Joining up with my son, who needs to move back to this area, seemed like an ideal solution and an opportunity for me to reduce my working to part time.
My biggest worry is the not-knowing about the future, mine and his.. Ohh if only I had a crystal ball!!

You mention a few times about you may needing care in the future Do you seriously want your son to be bogged down as your carer surely he needs to be free as a bird to get on with his life not bogged down worrying about his mum in his garden
Let him live his life and if you need care get it from outside your family it just isn’t fair on him and (maybe) a future wife or partner to be so close He’s got no siblings to share the job with be independent for his sake

Try not to worry over this Marysunshine, you are happy right now and it is only a thought. Step back if you can and enjoy your life while trying not to think about your sons future, which is down to him and whatever future partner he might choose. You are working, so are much younger than me and others. Health and fitness do deteriorate sneakily over time, none of us thought we would have to adapt to being older but it is the march of time. Your thought was very kind but now is exactly the time when you should be thinking about your own future, your security, your safety and your comfort

Thankyou all for your continuing messages and thoughts here. It has really opened my eyes up to some things I had not thought about as well as reinforcing some of the concerns I already had .. ie the long term future and not knowing what care I may need or not need... I hadnt even thought about the will side of things!!
But so far all we have done is discuss this together because we saw a house that possibly would be suitable.

Pamgeo & not Spaghetti I would not swap homes with my son although he once did ask me if I would. He lives an hour away and in the city. I have my work, my friends and a good social life all in this area, as well as living on the edge of the forest. It would not work for me .. But thankyou for for the thought..

pamgeo sorry - just noticed you have suggested similar.

Could you be happy in your son's flat? Is it in a suitable area? Would he consider continuing to pay the mortgage (or equivalent mortgage on your house)?
My aunt simply did a swap with a young family she was fond of! She lost out financially but ended up in a more suitable home (as did they) and it was done relatively easily apparently.

Elderly neighbour did this with daughter and son in law and 2 grandchildren. She was used for free babysitter, children were always on her floor and eventually the husband
ripped her off and she ended up losing out after she found out he was hurting her daughter. The daughter is now happy with new partner but she lost out big style.

Marysunshine whatever planning regulations are in relation to doing up an existing building and whether your caravan is mobile or not, if the intention is for you to have the structure, mobile or not, as your permanent home that puts a very different slant on what you plan. You will need planning permission, you certainly will not be allowed a separate entrance (I assume you mean, car access or footpath). Your plan is fraught with problems.

I am definite on this because our next door neighbour is trying to do exactly the same thing - turn a run-down implement shed into a bungalow for, in his case, his daughter and family to use when visiting from the USA. The outside of his building will be unchanged, no extension or anything. He is in the fifth year of trying to find a solution that satisfies council and neighbours. He cannot have a separate foot or vehicle entrance for the property, he cannot have a chimney. The objections from neighbours and so on have been endless.

Then there are all the problems that would arise if you went into care and needed to release the funds you have invested in the property to pay for care.

To give a simple example. You sell your house for £200,000 and buy the property you both intend to live in and your son gives £100,000 towards your costs. If you go into care, the council will investigate your circumstances and will see that you spent £200,000 for the property and your son only paid you £100,000 and they will assess you as still having assets of £100,000 invested in the property. Either your son would have to sell the house when you went into care to pay for it, or they will put a charge on the property and he will have to stump up the £100,000 plus interest when you die.

I am afraid I wouldn't consider doing what you intend to do, in a hundred years.

You need to protect your future should your son predecease you.

The contents of his will could cause you all kinds of problems.

MarySunshine

Would the property be jointly owned, as in would both you and your son be on the deeds?

Could you possibly just swap homes ? Pay each other rent or buy each others property ? That way you both have the change you need and still maintain your independence.

I’d be worried that in the (present) albeit unlikely future, what if the AC split up? Big upheaval then grandma.

No one has a crystal ball.

Marysunshine I am worried for you. Honestly I do think you should take a different route and get yourself a bricks and mortar place of your own or even a park home but not what is virtually a caravan in a garden. I think neighbours would object strongly, you would be almost like a traveller setting up home or like the lady in a van on a more permanent site but even that may not even be permanent in the long run. Your son would own the house and field and you could be turfed out if he meets a lady love who does not like you

My dd set up a mobile structure in a small field opposite her house, two second hand stables. Is that really what you want as you reach difficult and fragile old age ? I think that letting go of the apron strings is very hard but really your son should be standing on his own two feet. You are still wanting to spoon feed him, not doing him any favours and making your future comfort very precarious

I think that, whatever you do, there are always risks. Nobody can predict the future. Far too many older people live isolated lives, though, so any way of being nearer (not in with) AC has to be worth considering.

Many of us live very long lives now. It makes no sense remaining in an unsuitable home while our children struggle with too small accommodation - or very far from work and us for cost reasons. They might as well have some of their inheritance when we downsize. I wouldn't mind living in an annexe as long as it was self contained.

My sister has done this and it works out very well for her. I wouldn't like it though because what if the DC want to move house. It could get very messy. I would think very carefully about it.

Yes Bluebelle I have also wondered the same. My son and his partner are together, but living apart. If she wanted to move in to the house it would be fine as they have been together for years and I really would like to see them living together. If they parted and he met someone else I wouldnt be happy should they want to move in together..

Chrissyh has just pointed out a tale where a break up caused problems and yes it is a concern of mine too...

Yes I am Craftyone. Planning permission is not needed as long as the structure is considered mobile. However, there are certain permissions & plenty of rules to doing something like this and we intend to check everything out, including a talk with a solicitor, before we make a final decision.
The way we thought to finance this is for me to buy outright with the proceeds of my property. My son would use his mortgage to give me 100 k for my home/costs and refunishing a smaller home.. I was looking at spending about 45 k on an annex and all the services would probably cost around 15 k.. Whats left over would be mine as need to have a savings pot .. and of course things can always go wrong!!

It is not so much my dream to do this .. but it seemed like a cheaper living idea for me and I would also be around to help out more with school runs and helping out with the little one ...
My biggest concern Crafyone is that my son doesnt appear to have any concerns!

Your son wants to be nearer his partner and son Why, aren’t they together then ? Do you mean they are split up and if so what if he meets someone else and wants to move again or are they together and will she be moving in this house
If you become unwell or unable is your son going to have to look after you
Each story is different, I love my children but would never consider living in their garden I think it would be a disaster but maybe it would work well for you

I have a story of success, and an unsuccessful story. Firstly, the unsuccessful story. My DMil sold her bungalow and paid to have a granny flat built over her daughter's garage. All went well until, after a few years, her D and H broke up and the house had to be sold. DMil couldn't afford to buy anything and was effectively homeless until her brother, a windower, kindly asked her to move in with him.

My aunt sold her property, her DD & H sold theirs and they bought a house with a ready-made granny annex. It has worked perfectly. I think having a kitchen in the annex has helped as my aunt is very independent so her DD is at hand but they are not living in each other's pockets.

Marysunshine, I wish you well and understand your thinking but you are talking about a residence within a garden. You are unlikely to get planning permission for that. You would likely need about 100k+ to get plans and services to it ie sewerage etc plus the actual building work with footings and access etc. You say that you are at the bottom of the house market as it is. Does your son have a very good job so he could get a good mortgage while you might provide the cash for the new building?

I think this is your dream but I fear that it is not feasible or practical

Thanks for sharing the full story. MarySunshine. There are no right or wrong answers and I believe you must use your instincts to sway your decision.
You could say; nothing ventured...

In your particular circimstances, I think I would pursue this house and annex because you have only one DS and one DGS to think of. Have a good look around and make sure you all like it and can visualise your lives there.
You only live once, as far as I know.
I am sorry jenny about your friend's situation. It sounds as if she was only doing this to suit her DH which never works because she will be resentful and no one is happy. Citizen's Advice?

Thankyou all for your inputs and stories - certainly food for thought!! My biggest concerns are the future and if I ever needed to go into a care home, or my sons situation changing, and these are the concern most mentioned in your replies!! And more horror stories than happy endings too.. Ummmm
My situation is this. At the moment I live alone, semi-rural, with the nearest supermarket 3 miles away and an almost non-existent bus service. I have a bought and paid for my home but I have no savings or pension pot. I have a very busy life, and Im lucky not to get lonely.
Within the three years (when I retire) I intended to down size and move nearer to town. Because property is expensive in this area (and I dont really want to move to far away) My idea was to buy a mobile home, as Im at the bottom of the property market here already.
Four years ago, my son moved an hour away to be nearer his job and has his own flat, with a mortgage. He now wants to move back to this area, where his partner and young child are still living. He wants to be nearer his child and have him stay with him at weekends, which he will find it harder to do once the little fella starts school next year.
He could buy in this area with a bigger mortgage, but I dont really want him doing that.

We have looked at a property which has a very large garden with a cabin at the end. We had the idea to divide the garden off and 'update' the cabin to an annex, which we would design and have built for me to live in.. We would have seperate entrances but the gas/electric would be run for the main house.
I would be getting the smaller part, but I had plans to live in a caravan anyway.
I would only be moving a few miles from where I am now, so still be able to meet with friends and continue my life as I know it. The house we have seen is also on a bus route and only a short walk to the supermarket & shops.

I have only one son and everything I have will be left to him & my grandson when I leave this world..