Help! I seem to be a noisy neighbour

This is sadly an increasingly common problem. It strikes me that people who grew up in houses don't realise that you can hear the sounds of everyday living in a block of flats.

I second the advice to stop being so accommodating.

Next time she complains tell her that she will just have to put up with the sounds of daily life from you flat.

In your place, I would contact the council and your landlord and ask exactly what the rules concerning noise are. Then hand a written copy to your neighbours.

Would exchanging flats with them be an option?

We have always lived in detached houses but were thinking of downsizing into a apartment. I am afraid this post hasn’t sold us the idea at all.
One of our sons had this situation at his flat in London. He owned the top two floors and a selfish individual and serial complainer owned the bottom. He hardly had a minutes piece even though he had all the ground floor up and insulated at his expense, the complaining continued.
My son sold it to a family with three children. Ha.

How awful to make your lives a misery. We live in a very old house end of terrace and the walls are 9 inch thick brick so we hear nothing from the neighbours. You can ask your neighbours to contact the local council and complain, or you can complain to the council yourself. They can investigate the problem and at least there will be something official and some proof either way which would be helpful to buyers. You could go down the legal route but that would cost you. Or contact Citizens Advice Bureau. Take a stand and don't be bullied.

Some people just enjoy making others lives a misery. Sounds like you've done everything you can to accommodate them. Anyone who lives in a flat has to accept there may be a little noise from time to time. The same as those of us who live in semis on estates should, reasonably, accept that we and neighbours may intrude a little into one another lives occasionally. We used to have awful neighbours who complained about the slightest thing. In fact, within a few days of us moving into our house they informed us of all the things the previous owners had done to upset them, some of which were ridiculous. We even dreaded doing anything in our own garden as they watched what we were doing like hawks. We were very good, quiet, considerate neighbours. Fortunately they moved a few years ago and our current neighbours are a joy. So dont let them bully you.

Some people have said to keep your own record of their complaints but also of your activities, dates, times etc.

If you can record any noise you do make and keep a record. You are allowed to make some noise.

Do some research. You have the right to a life and to live reasonably in your home.

If you can get you own noise survey if their complains are making your life miserable. You may have a case for harassment.

My sister had this situation and the people below had been complaining about her for over a year, they were told to record her noise and keep a record on her.

Luckily the lady across the landing knew about this and suggested my sister do the same. Record her noise and the noise from the neighbour. Worked well and they were told her noise was reasonable and well within permitted limits.

I think what really finished it was they stated she'd made lots of noise out of spite after the case was closed.

Ha ha ha, my sister was away that week and had proof so when the Environmental people went round with a view to take action against my sister the neighbours were told to stop harassing her or she'd have a case against them.

Don't know if that it's true that my sister would have had a case against them for harassment but her quality of life improved and she felt she could live in her own home again.

So sad you are having to go through this but may be time to find out YOUR Rights and make a stand. Good Luck.

Say that the is a family with a couple of toddlers is very interested in buying you flat.

My friend was at her wits end, put her flat on the market which was snapped up by the complainer and made into a duplex!

My upstairs neighbour did not want to pay for a plumber to check her water pipes which were leaking, she said it was my fault as it was from my pipes sending the water up!

Noise (and water) travels and it is not always evident where the origin is. Note down every time they complain.

How much noise do you hear from their flat? Surely you would hear noise from eg hoovers, tvs, plumbing. Noise does not just travel downwards. Why can't they soundproof the rest of their flat like the studio if the noise is so bad? You have carpets which I think is great. Why wooden floors are permitted in flats I'll never understand. You do seem to be trying so hard to accommodate their demands that you must eventually run out of solutions. Also, have they thought that the declaration about noise being a nuisance works both ways and that either of you may find it hard to sell. I personally only think it would be an issue if there was an official intervention. They are "posturing" thinking they have a hold over you. Carry on living how you want to and get cracking with the food mixer!

My friends mum complained to her constantly about the loud music coming through the walls day and night. She was in her eighties, bless her. My friend went round several times to hear the loud noise, but heard nothing on each visit. Turned out het mum had quite severe tinnitus.

I can’t imagine how you are surviving this! I would make a note of all their complaints along with a note of what you have done to alleviate these + costs. It seems you can do no more. Next time they complain present them with a copy, suggest they buy ear defenders and then revert to a normal lifestyle to which you are more than entitled. They either have exceptionally sensitive hearing or more likely, just enjoy complaining and making other’s lives a misery.

Where did they live before? Have they downsized from a grand mansion and expect to live the same way?
I agree with the others, live your life as you would and yes, get a solicitor on to it if necessary. Don't let them push you out!!

It sounds as if you've gone above and beyond to accommodate the people below you Jess I wouldn't do anymore if I were you. They're being totally unreasonable and if they are that sensitive to any kind of noise, why did they buy a flat with one above it?

As for telling prospective buyers there's a noise problem, if they really want to move, why would they do that?

You've asked for helpful suggestions, well the only one I have is that you stop creeping around your own home and having whispered conversations. You're considerate, understanding neighbours so get on with your own lives and disregard any future complaints.

There doesnt seem to be any proper sound insulation in flats anymore. Im in a ground floor flat and am a very light sleeper and get woken up by my upstairs neighbour nearly every night when he gets up to use the toilet. He lets his bedroom door bang ( they are heavy fire doors so self closing) I can hear him peeing, he then drops the toilet seat lid which bangs, he flushes the toilet, the water pipes run through my flat. I can cope with noise during the day but over night the noise is just amplified!

I live in a 1930's end of terrace and I can hear any DIY from the rest. The house at the other end (five doors away) had a replacement extension and the noise vibrations travelled right through.

Your neighbours seem to be very over-sensitive to noise and I think you should just get on with your life as usual. It’s your home too.
Do you have any contact with the previous owners? If so they could perhaps prepare a statement saying that there was no noise problem when they lived there and this could then be useful for selling purposes, etc. Good luck.

I agree you should keep your own harassment diary and send them a solicitors letter warning them you will take legal action if they don’t stop harassing you. If they had evidence of your excess noise they would have already gone to the council or police with it. Get in there first and if they then try to take things further it will just look like further harassment.

"It's like now they know we'll try and compromise they're just pushing us more and more and I realise I've even stopped making cakes in case they complain about the food mixer."

This is exactly what is going on. Nothing you do will ever be enough. IT IS NOW TIME TO STOP. Live your life as you please, stop worrying about the normal noise of living. When they complain, direct them to the council to make an official complaint. Call their bluff.

I found this very interesting - "They want to move but have told prospective buyers there's a noise problem, which puts us in a very uncomfortable position." If they really wanted to move, they wouldn't have mentioned it to anyone, let alone potential buyers. So they're playing games, using it as another lever to push you right into a corner. See them for what they are, bullies. Best way to deal with them, push back. No more compromises, no more restricting yourselves in your life, ignore them and refer them to the council if they want to complain about noise, because you Are. Not. Listening. To. Their. Spurious. Complaints. Any. Longer.

I think you have been very accommodating. They are cutting their noses off to spite their faces by declaring noise issue as people will be reluctant to put in an offer with noise issues I wonder if she said this just to scare you. As a previous poster has said, write down every complaint and any action taken by you - you are being harassed.

Dee1012
Could be deferred noise from other flats? Sound can travel a fair distance in blocks of flats and maybe she is hearing noise from other flats and blaming you as your flat is closest? If what she is hearing is not what you are doing...i.e playing loud music? Sadly too many flats were built with absolutely no sound insulation.

I've had similar problems with a neighbour who continues to state she can hear noises from my home....there isn't any!
She'd complain about D.I.Y noise, none taking place. Loud 'thudding' music...I'd be reading with nothing playing or on and her latest is a "generator" that's making her house shake.
I've spoken with my local council and the Police....all tell me to ignore it and refer her to them BUT it wears you down and I find myself on eggshells waiting for knock on my door.
I'm convinced there's a mental health issue going on and while I really do have every sympathy, it's now affecting my life and I'm at a loss about what to do.

We had this problem with a serial complainer at my son's flat. We had all the floors, stairs, pipes and appliances sound insulated.

We bought the quietest washing machine (put on a special mat) and agreed which times he could use it.

Still he complained.

My son had no TV or sound system, only music through headphones. He never had visitors, apart from family. We walked barefoot.

Still he complained.

He worked for the council and got a clearance order for the 'overgrown' (perfectly normal) garden, saying it was infested with rats and foxes. We cleared it all, finding a lone bumble bee 'infestation' and put down gravel.

Still he complained.

My son moved out, let it through an agent, and moved - to NZ!

You are doing all you can. Just live your lives...don't worry. If they don't like the low level noise of normal life that is their problem. They can wear ear plugs.

As the others have said - stop accommodating them. they sound very noise sensitive. As long as you are not playing loud music after 9pm, etc. you are acting responsibly. If it was me, I would keep a diary myself of what they complain about and when, and what was going on in your flat (with a photo if relevant) just before it (in case they decide to make a complaint - then you will have your own evidence). But sounds like they just can't adapt to living in a flat. Hopefully, they will move. (If things don't improve consider calling in a Mediation Service - when allowed).

I thought you only need to declare a dispute when selling a home if it had been made official. I’m thinking about the Council re noise, mess etc or police re behaviour for example. It might be worth checking with your solicitor, if selling, before you tick the box on the form about disputes.

They are being unreasonable. I live in a semi. There is a driveway between the two properties. I can hear next door play the piano and hear his washing machine. Tell them to live on an island if they want silence.
As for you saying he has built a studio.
My son is a professional Dubbing Mixer and works for Sky.
During the pandemic he has been set up by them at home. Making and producing the Sound Overs that he would normally do in a sound proof studio at work. He lives in a middle flat in a small block. He has had absolutely no problem because he has the correct equipment. His only problem has been the cats that want to sit on his lap all day.
I hope this helps they are being totally unreasonable.

Please stop accomodating them as if you don't make a stand they will keep doing it. If they have sensitive hearing that is not your fault and they need to sort that out themselves .You are running yourself ragged by continuing worry about their complaints. Footsteps and hearing cooking machinery for a few minutes is all part of life.
If they can't handle living in a ground floor flat then they need to move. Stop now you have been very reasonable the next complaint will be you are unreasonable when you don't listen to them any more. They will find something else to complain about. You are thinking and trying to work things out and they really are not thinking about you and your family. Perfect time to start making cakes again.