Retirement Living

Spangler what is the connection between retiring and rusting? For most people retiring is just a change of profession not a retreat from life.

Charities are highly dependent on retiree volunteers who do everything from making tea and working in shops to running large charitable organisations. Some after years of sitting at a desk become artists, musicians and writers. Several very well known writers did not start their writing careers until they retired.

The days of going from work to slippers and pipe is well in the past.

Hmm, we have a whole army of spiders who enjoy spinning webs across every room the day after a through cleaning!
A price you pay for living in an old house.Mind you, no flies

Bet you haven't got any cobwebs though like what I've got

J52, meet your twin

Not for me, either. I’m going like Miss Havisham!

Retirement? I would rather wear out than rust out.
I stole that from Dolly Parton.

My concern is not so much the social life or the cost, although these would be a concern. My problem is quite simply that the accommodation is far too small, both in floor area and range of rooms supplied.

Some time ago we decided, that when we, or I down size, there will need to be at three rooms each a minimum of 16ft by 12 for daytime living. One would be a kitchen diner where the room can be in two halves, kitchen end and diining end, one would be the living room and the third the workroom/study. I would also want three bedrooms so that family can easily stay, and be comfortable, especially if they staying in time of need - my and DH's need, not their's. 1/2 bedroomed accommodation with Guest Suites, at a nightly price just do not cut the mustard.

The main question you have to ask yourself is ' could I live in a small community' . I thought I could, how wrong was I, I hate it!! Although you have your own front door everyone knows when you go anywhere or have visitors. I was asked once what was in the parcel I'd had delivered, or what I had in my M&S bag!! If you go to the community lounge (closed during covid) all they do is gossip about other people. I've renamed the lounge as Gossip Central. They change friends as often as they change their knickers. They huddle in their little groups, it's so very clicky. It's hopeless sitting out in the summer as you don't get any peace because people stop to chat. Oh I could go on forever, the list is endless!! Oh heck I'm becoming a bloody recluse!

My MiL's flat certainly wasn't 'institutional looking'.

I think there are co-living, inter-generational, schemes that might be more suitable for some people who need their own space but who also like some shared public space and amenities.

As has been said, the charges on these retirement properties are usually pretty high, the flats themselves always seem quite institutional-looking and I believe they can be difficult to sell on.

This pandemic has really put me off these types of places. Socialisation in a communal lounge is the last thing I'd want, along with touching shared entry kepads and door handles. I remember MiL living in one and another resident came along to tell her she had taken her washing out of the machine in the laundry room for her. No thank you in this current climate and beyond.

I think a small bungalow in a residential road might suit you better.

I've done talks at a few M&S places and have always come away feeling quietly impressed. They seem to be maintained to a high standard and I liked the possibility of socialisation on my own terms with a place of my own to withdraw to if I wanted. They seem to be well located too. Only an opinion based on a handful of these places though.
My late MiL had a flat in a retirement complex (not M&S). It sold very quickly.

My father in law moved into a M&S flat in his 80’s. He loved it. He made friends and was very independent but we knew help was on hand if needed. When he died we managed to rent out the flat to a lovely lady who was only in her 60’s. She’s been living there for 5 years now. Perfect.

I was surprised that you can buy one as a ‘buy to let’ , so renters can come and go, also the monthly charges are high and obviously won’t ever go down.

Def not for us, are they all in Lockdown? Or can they still share the sitting areas? I forgot to ask that.

From all I’ve ever heard, a M&S flat is not what I’d want. High service and maintenance charges, and can be very difficult to sell for anything like what you paid - can be a big problem if care home fees are needed later, plus I gather that service/maintenance charges still have to be paid even if the place is empty for a year or more.

I did look at some with my mother many years ago but she didn’t like any of them well enough to want to buy one.