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De-cluttering, the never-ending process

(990 Posts)
karmalady Tue 21-Mar-23 07:49:13

De-cluttering can be emotionally and physically draining. We, when we were two, started the process from the family home and that was in 2006. The big de-clutter

Since then we moved house twice and had two more de-clutters

Then we became just I and I moved again to a new build with much less storage but I got storage made and I developed room for stash

Now at 75, I am on another mission, to remove what I don`t need or will not need. Last remove was from my garden just two days ago, tall planters, short planters and the contents

That bit of help, advice and encouragement is all we need. We know what to do but it is, or can be, psychologically difficult. Slow and steady is key

Esmay Thu 19-Oct-23 18:52:32

My decluttering is a perpetual thing :

Chatting to a young guy the other day - I discovered that he is a passionate baker and I've given him my huge collection of Bake Off books .
He was thrilled and I'm delighted that someone is going to use them .
And someone else has been given masses of bed linen which I wasn't using so a cupboard has been emptied .
Over the weekend , if the weather is OK - a young girl with a blank canvas is getting a lot of extra plants .

Doodledog Thu 19-Oct-23 15:00:22

I am so looking forward to having it all done and the bedrooms decorated. I struggle to do it, and as most of the clutter is mine, Mr Dog can’t really help, other than to keep taking the bags to the relevant drop-off places, but it will be worth it in the end.

Skydancer Thu 19-Oct-23 13:40:44

I declutter and then stuff seems to appear from somewhere. But I have been quite ruthless of late. Lots given away on Freecycle, some sold for small amounts on Facebook, stuff to charity shop, At least I feel others are getting use from things rather than them going into landfill. It IS difficult to do but we have recently renovated our main bedroom and are being ruthless as to what goes back in. It is quite minimalist and, to be honest, makes me love being in there.

Doodledog Thu 19-Oct-23 13:36:09

I know. It’s not easy. But the truth is that I rarely reread, as I always have a queue waiting. If I wanted to read something again I could get a new copy, or read it on Kindle. That doesn’t work with cook books or poetry (for me, anyway). I like to flick back and forth in those, and use actual bookmarks rather than electronic ones.

I am still considering the book issue, as I am still working on son’s room.

MayBee70 Thu 19-Oct-23 13:20:40

If I’ve loved a book I feel as though it has become part of me and can’t part with it.

Doodledog Thu 19-Oct-23 11:04:51

I think it’s a good test of how much you want to reread a book if you have to buy a new copy to do so.

Today I am doing my son’s old room, which has become a dumping ground like all the bedrooms. He is working near us next week and planning to stay here overnight, so I plan to get it finished for then. If I get the wardrobes sorted out (more overspill in those) and sort the ‘to be sorted’ pile it will be a good start.

karmalady Thu 19-Oct-23 06:48:10

Books are so nice Doodledog, to hold and to read and I empathise. Passing them on would give someone else that same pleasure. I think that many books are meant to be shared on and on down the line. The books I don`t let go are all technical in some way, materia medica, specialist crafting and there is a thick tome about woodworking. They are all staying with me.

I liked that 20/20 concept, it makes good sense.

fancythat Wed 18-Oct-23 22:41:13

Glad I have done the books.
I quite like decluttering. But books held me up.

I have only moved the once.
And didnt have that many possessions when I did. Which was more than 30 years ago.

fancythat Wed 18-Oct-23 22:39:09

Doodledog

I've just been reading about the 20/20 rule of decluttering. The gist is that you can safely declutter anything you are keeping 'just in case' if you can replace it for less than £20 within 20 minutes of your house. According to the authors, that should cover 99% of 'just in case' items, as 'just in case' rarely comes to pass, and it would certainly apply to the vast majority of the books I am hanging onto. Hmmmm.

Interesting.

I can now see that the last job will end up being the loft. Shudder.
I have had a couple of goes over the years. But need to be more ruthless this time around. Need to do it thoroughly.

Not at all sure how much could be replaced for under £20, Not a lot I dont think. But have not thought of the loft in those terms before. Hmm.

Doodledog Wed 18-Oct-23 22:09:06

The books?

I know - I hate getting rid of them, but I have bookcases in every room, and they are all full. If I ever want to read another new book I need to thin them out. My children both read, but don't hang onto books - they read them and pass them on. They don't have reference books either, as they can Google everything they need to know. It's a different mindset, and I can't quite get into it, but it makes sense.

RosiesMaw Wed 18-Oct-23 20:58:44

Well it wouldn't for me!

Doodledog Wed 18-Oct-23 16:24:26

I've just been reading about the 20/20 rule of decluttering. The gist is that you can safely declutter anything you are keeping 'just in case' if you can replace it for less than £20 within 20 minutes of your house. According to the authors, that should cover 99% of 'just in case' items, as 'just in case' rarely comes to pass, and it would certainly apply to the vast majority of the books I am hanging onto. Hmmmm.

Doodledog Wed 18-Oct-23 15:50:46

the thought of that fills me with dread, Nannashirlz. We've only had three houses in the 43 years we've been married. Having said that, maybe if we'd moved more often I wouldn't have so much 'stuff'.

Anyway - three bags to the tip and five to the charity shop today. I am about to book a collection for the books to go next week, too. It's been a slow process, but I'm starting to see light at the end of the tunnel.

Nannashirlz Wed 18-Oct-23 14:22:47

Being an ex military wife I can’t remember how many times I’ve moved and not just in this country but overseas too and back to uk and I’ve just done my last move 6 weeks ago I’m moving no more I’m happy with my bungalow

AreWeThereYet Tue 17-Oct-23 16:51:11

Shall I be wearing jeans again? Probably not, so six pairs could go but what to replace them with?

Do you sew? You could use the jeans to make yourself a lovely denim midi/maxi skirt. Loads of videos of YouTube 😄 I've already cut my old jeans into strips to make a cross body bag.

I almost live in M&S jeggings - buy a size bigger than your normal size (so they're not skin tight and really stretched) and they're really comfy but still look reasonably smart. I even wear thin thermal leggings under mine in the Winter.

Doodledog Tue 17-Oct-23 16:02:12

There's another few bags gone. About 10 cushions that will never be used again, more bedding and several coats that no longer fit. I have bagged up a load of books, but I know a lot of shops don't take them. I have a lot more books to go, but I am struggling with those ones.

Annoyingly, as soon as I clear space and decide what I want to do with the cleared area, Mr Dog decides that he wants some of it😡. He did it when I had bookcases built downstairs, and he's doing it again with the linen cupboard. I know he lives here too, but it really feels like one step forward and two back at times.

fancythat Tue 17-Oct-23 13:29:31

Cant say I have a huge amount of clothes.
Average amount or less?

I now work on the premise of, buying something if there is a "gap" in my wardrobe.
Just bought a long winter dress. Or Autumn/winter.

karmalady Tue 17-Oct-23 12:30:00

Callistemon, I wore black jeans in Frome yesterday. They felt and looked very nice. My older jeans I wear for the house, local shopping, gardening and cycling. I will never discard my jeans

karmalady Tue 17-Oct-23 12:27:33

Alice75

Some of you seem to have a huge amount of clothes!

yes and mostly lovely linens, cottons, viscose and silks and almost all are beautifully hand made to a high standard

Alice75 Tue 17-Oct-23 12:04:22

Doodledog

I did, but I am thinning them out. We've lived here for 25 years, and they have been accumulated over that time. We discussed this upthread, but some of us were brought up not to get rid of things in case they came in useful, or to see it as a waste of money. This is a support thread to encourage one another to let things go with no criticism.

I see no reason why you can't wear jeans if you want to, Cal. I now prefer leggings with long tops/jumpers as they are more comfortable - I carry weight around my middle, and jeans dig in - but I don't see them as being inappropriate for those of us in 'later youth' wink.

Comfy trousers are a godsend if you can find them, but there is a fine line between comfy and frumpy grin. I have a great pair from Oska - they are a pull-on style made of cotton with stretch, and have a concealed elasticated waist, so look smart as well as comfortable.

No criticism intended! I guess we’ve always lived unfairly small houses, with little storage, and also not had a lot of money - so fewer clothes (and “stuff”) because nowhere to put them!

Callistemon21 Tue 17-Oct-23 11:48:02

Thanks, RosiesMaw, I couldn't remember the name of the charity.

RosiesMaw Tue 17-Oct-23 11:22:23

^Would the Salvation Army charity shops want them?
Also, some charities have rails of work and interview clothes for people trying to get back into work, I believe^
That occurred to me. I gave all Paw’s good suits and shirts to Emmaus which trains homeless men (I think) for a job/trade whatever and I thought suits might be useful for interviews etc.
I did keep the one he wore to the last daughter’s wedding though, (2015) out of sentiment, still with its buttonhole.🌸

Callistemon21 Tue 17-Oct-23 11:16:24

I see no reason why you can't wear jeans if you want to, Cal. I now prefer leggings with long tops/jumpers as they are more comfortable - I carry weight around my middle, and jeans dig in - but I don't see them as being inappropriate for those of us in 'later youth' wink .

I think I've gone past even the later youth stage now!

I really don't like leggings, it's just the feel of them on my legs, sets my teeth on edge.
Odd, moi? Yes!

Callistemon21 Tue 17-Oct-23 11:13:40

Cabbie21

I do. But as long they still fit me and suit my purposes and the various seasons, I am reluctant to get rid, whilst I have enough space
Getting rid of the late DH’s good suits and posh jackets is a different matter. The homeless shelter doesn’t have a call for them and I am slowly dispersing them around charity shops, one in each.

Would the Salvation Army charity shops want them?
Also, some charities have rails of work and interview clothes for people trying to get back into work, I believe.

Doodledog Tue 17-Oct-23 11:07:18

I did, but I am thinning them out. We've lived here for 25 years, and they have been accumulated over that time. We discussed this upthread, but some of us were brought up not to get rid of things in case they came in useful, or to see it as a waste of money. This is a support thread to encourage one another to let things go with no criticism.

I see no reason why you can't wear jeans if you want to, Cal. I now prefer leggings with long tops/jumpers as they are more comfortable - I carry weight around my middle, and jeans dig in - but I don't see them as being inappropriate for those of us in 'later youth' wink.

Comfy trousers are a godsend if you can find them, but there is a fine line between comfy and frumpy grin. I have a great pair from Oska - they are a pull-on style made of cotton with stretch, and have a concealed elasticated waist, so look smart as well as comfortable.