Anyone moved home in their mid 60s? What did you get right? And wrong?

Cont...although I have no near neighbours, my house is far away from the road so I feel safe here. However, at 89 years if age I do need gardeners now to keep the large garden under control. I have no local transport so have to drive the 3 miles to town, Dr, Dentist, Hospital etc. Every so often I do look for a suitable property in a suitable area but, so far, haven't been able to get both in one place. With my dog and rescued cats I wouldn't want to live near a busy road so, looks as if I will be staying put.

No or very few stairs is a key factor in my opinion, as well as location.

Downsized in 2019 to a two bedroom up and down stairs. Cleared out a great deal of stuff. It's amazing what you collect over the years. In the new house I have struggled for room to keep the stuff I wanted. It remains in boxes. No loft to store it. Miss the large bedroom from the old house. Sometimes I think I should have taken one level house. Currently trying to get a low maintenance garden for my older years. I turn 60 this year.

Moved 3 years ago aged 68 & 69, from a 3 bed semi to a 3 bed detached. We now have a newer warmer house with a utility (which is great after winter walks with the dog) and a downstairs toilet, nice wide drive (our old drive was very narrow & difficult to to reverse out of. Our garden is smaller but unfortunately hubbys health has deteriorated so hes now happier with a smaller plot. Chemists, doctors and park a few minutes walk away. Bus stop round the corner. Only thing I miss is the large garden with a pond. The hardest thing was getting rid of stuff after 40 years in our old house.

I have wanted to move for the last 10 years to be nearer to DD , cousin and school friend. Also OH friends of 60 years at his sports club. I want to upsize to 3 rather than 2 bedrooms,( 1 each) so we can have friends and family to stay OH likes it here as he has a reclining chair which he can sleep in and have the TV turned up to max volume. We are a car ride away from a bus stop and rail station. 7 miles from nearest friend. No one calls without making an appointment as we are so isolated. I have only spoken to tradesmen and shop assistants in the last 2 weeks. The garden is now going back to nature as we can no longer tend it. The only up side to living in this area is the second to non health service. I am not sure that I am joking saying that we could be dead a week and no one would know. I don't care how much work it will take to move but I am determined not to leave here in a wooden box.
Has anyone any ideas or inspiration for how to get OH ready to move?

In late 60s moved from a large 4 bed to another 4 bed. Being a new build all the rooms are a lot smaller. The garden is about the the same as had to accommodate a large shed for DH As family live far and wide still wanted to be able to accommodate them when they came to stay. Neighbourhood is good, very small community and good neighbours. Public transport is non existent but that's no different to where we were before. Since DH died I am conscious of being totally responsible for my transport and have looked at other areas I feel I would like but transport is overall really dire unless you live in a busy area within a town and that is not for me.

This thread is very encouraging for those who are thinking of moving to make life easier, because the majority of posts that I’ve read have been very positive about their new homes.

I think unfortunately the older you get, the harder it can be.

melp1

Moved 3 years ago aged 68 & 69, from a 3 bed semi to a 3 bed detached. We now have a newer warmer house with a utility (which is great after winter walks with the dog) and a downstairs toilet, nice wide drive (our old drive was very narrow & difficult to to reverse out of. Our garden is smaller but unfortunately hubbys health has deteriorated so hes now happier with a smaller plot. Chemists, doctors and park a few minutes walk away. Bus stop round the corner. Only thing I miss is the large garden with a pond. The hardest thing was getting rid of stuff after 40 years in our old house.

I can understand re the "getting rid of stuff". I got rid of a fair amount when I moved here 11 years ago. I'm now thinking "Well I'm early 70's now - so I've got an estimated 15 odd years to go" and so I'm onto a second round. I want enough of my "stuff" because it is things like books on topics of interest to me and generally to help me remember who I am iyswim. But there's an element of Swedish Death Cleaning going on now - as I'm thinking "15 years isn't that long really....and I don't want a long life anyway personally and so hopefully it won't be due to be longer than that. How many things am I going to need within the next 15 years?" So there's an element of keeping clothes, for instance, that are "older" (ie when I was "my size" - rather than 2-3 sizes bigger than that as at present and when clothes were "normal" quality, rather than more recent poor quality) for instance - as well as the cheapo bigger clothing I'm currently wearing. I keep older factual books to remind me I was once considered "ahead of my time" in my thinking in many ways - and now the exact same ideas are having me labelled as "old-fashioned racist etc etc". The same ideas in the same lifetime?!!! But yep....I don't have to read a book about it to get the general idea it means = declutter/simplify/etc. It makes life easier not to have to hunt amongst surplus belongings to find the ones one actually requires....

Farzanah - you're spot on re the older you are the harder it gets to move. Therefore it's as well to get on with it. One doesn't want to spend time deciding what to do about a house, find the tradespeople to do it and you're not getting as much "payback" for it (as you won't be living in it for many years to reap the benefit of all your hard work and paying out). Then there's the "social life" aspect - having to get out and about and make friends/get to know a new area/etc and one's patience for that runs out as you get older and think "Am I going to have enough years use out of this to make it worth it?".

I'm 71 and in July I moved from a small town to a large city. I woke up 2 1/2 years ago to find that my husband of 37 years had died during the night. He just slipped away. I live in Louisiana and my 2 grown children live in a suburb of New Orleans. So after being paralyzed with the shock of my husband's death, I gave in to my children's urgings, sold our home and moved to Metairie, LA. After owning a home in a neighborhood with an unreasonably strict Home Owners Association (HOA) I decided to rent. Not to mention Biden has all but destroyed the housing market here. I prayed and prayed about the house I would find and God found me one tailor made for me. I love it and I am free of that darn HOA! If the dishwasher breaks I just pick up the telephone! Yea me! As I said I am 71, live alone, drive even in the metropolis and feeling very free.

MilestOne
Has anyone any ideas or inspiration for how to get OH ready to move?

Seems like it's time for you to put your wants and needs first. Your husband can recline in his chair anywhere. Can you get your DD on board with this?

If you have funds removers can be paid to pack everything and move it even if you don't feel able to declutter at this end.

Its easy to let the years slip away. You know your husband best - start chipping away at his reluctance to move and take some daily action, however small, to reach your goal of moving.

I had to do something similar with my son who had become far too comfortable living with me yet had anxieties about moving. The first step was telling him it was going to happen - he would be getting his own place ad I was moving. 18 months on and we are both moved and both happier.

Each day in my actions - throwing out some items etc; reseaching property - I demonstrated to him and myself that change was going to happen and it did. You can do this.

fancythat

Calendargirl

I notice many are saying how convenient moving to a bungalow has been, no stairs to worry about.

And no one has mentioned the dreaded ‘bungalow legs’, which many seem to see as a consequence of bungalow living.

As a bungalow owner, I am very happy with it, no desire to have stairs again.

Keep using your legs and hopefully they will be ok.

Personally, I dont understand the concept of bungalow legs.
I dont know anyone who has them I dont think?
But would I know if I did?

And then older people sometimes move to a bungalow. So then no one cares any more about them??

As I say, I dont get it.

I could start a thread sometime I suppose. So as not to derail this one.

I've always believed this is an Urban Myth. After all no-one who lives in a ground floor flat gets accused of having ''bungalow legs''..

mh1953

I'm 71 and in July I moved from a small town to a large city. I woke up 2 1/2 years ago to find that my husband of 37 years had died during the night. He just slipped away. I live in Louisiana and my 2 grown children live in a suburb of New Orleans. So after being paralyzed with the shock of my husband's death, I gave in to my children's urgings, sold our home and moved to Metairie, LA. After owning a home in a neighborhood with an unreasonably strict Home Owners Association (HOA) I decided to rent. Not to mention Biden has all but destroyed the housing market here. I prayed and prayed about the house I would find and God found me one tailor made for me. I love it and I am free of that darn HOA! If the dishwasher breaks I just pick up the telephone! Yea me! As I said I am 71, live alone, drive even in the metropolis and feeling very free.

So sorry to hear you lost your beloved husband so suddenly. It must have been the biggest shock of your life not to mention the hardest to come to terms with. Congratulations on making a decision that has improved you life going forward.

When we first moved to Scotland as a family, 49 years ago, we bought a bungalow. It was very practical with small children. It was like living in a flat but without the stairs. I loved it. With 2 more children and my mother to care for, we grew out of it.

We have just moved from a 2 bedroom semi to a park home. Love it should have done it years ago. One level, manageable garden. Friendly neighbors and helpful, our previous area was noisy too many power tools every week. Controlling and noisy inconsiderate neighbors. Now I live in a peaceful, beautiful area with nice people who just want peace and quiet. We are early 60s

Milest0ne

I responded, a few messages above, re how to get your husband ready to move but spelt your name wrongly

grassgreen

MilestOne
Has anyone any ideas or inspiration for how to get OH ready to move?

Seems like it's time for you to put your wants and needs first. Your husband can recline in his chair anywhere. Can you get your DD on board with this?

If you have funds removers can be paid to pack everything and move it even if you don't feel able to declutter at this end.

Its easy to let the years slip away. You know your husband best - start chipping away at his reluctance to move and take some daily action, however small, to reach your goal of moving.

I had to do something similar with my son who had become far too comfortable living with me yet had anxieties about moving. The first step was telling him it was going to happen - he would be getting his own place ad I was moving. 18 months on and we are both moved and both happier.

Each day in my actions - throwing out some items etc; reseaching property - I demonstrated to him and myself that change was going to happen and it did. You can do this.

Thank you for the encouragement. I promised myself that I would live longer than my mother who died aged 84. So Instill have 3 years to go. I do miss the sea and would love to move back to our hometown.

I moved last year. Still in my home town just a bit closer to shops etc. Sold a 3 beds, 2 bath bungalow for a brand new 2 bed house. Ok, so moving from a bungalow to a house at 68 probably wasn’t ideal but I couldn’t afford a bungalow. Apart from that it was a great move. Everything brand new, freshly decorated and a tiny courtyard garden.

On this topic - what is the oldest age someone has moved at - and do you feel it was a successful move (especially if you moved to a different area)?

CariadAgain my Dad moved from a 4-bed detached house on the south coast to a 1-bed retirement flat in the Midlands when he was 87. He's 93 now.
Mum had died earlier that year and he was bereft. He moved to our town and is now four miles away from us instead of 160 miles.
It's been the saving of him. Initially he was independent and had his car, he went out and about exploring.
Now he has developed vascular dementia but the in-house care team, plus a private day centre he goes to four days a week, look after him extremely well.
He says he "feels safe" living where he does. I do all his admin and banking, my husband does a lot to help as well.
It was the best decision ever for all of us.

Glad to hear it V3ra......

Anyone else?

About to move at 81, once our house sells.

I know someone who joined his son in Australia at the age of 93.
Age is a number and if you still have the ability to enjoy life and an ambition to change things for the better, why not?

grassgreen

Have recently sold and living temporarily with family. Previous home was 4 bed detached in a safe, semi rural area but it was time to move on. Didn't need all those empty rooms or such a large garden. Yet when thinking about my next home, I'm struggling to know what would not only meet my needs now, but also in the future.

Currently I'm 66, fit and well, drive, and happily work part time. I'll be living on my own.

Tell me what worked well for you when you moved, and what didn't. Are there things you wished you'd known about or considered?

My knees like ground floor living, storage areas with easy access.

Though not something i have had to do yet reading this a lot of people seem to name transport as a major concern; most places I have lived there are community transports schemes which are excellent for getting you where you need to go. a lifeline for Drs Hospitals etc but also shopping hairdressers etc. our local one does trips out too such as to the garden centre. to join you pay a one off fee then each journey pay per mile