Gransnet forums

Legal & money

Potential Nursing Home Fees

(6 Posts)
MirandaJane Sun 12-Aug-12 17:28:14

My mother is nearly 88 and I am 63 and caring for her.
Mum has physical problems but there are no signs of dementia or any need to go into a nursing home at present as long as I care for her.
Owing to her physical problems we have decided a walk in shower is necessary.
She also needs a new bed and a ramp for her wheel chair. I have been pulling it up the step but I am no longer a spring chicken and I fear I could damage myself if I continue with this.
My car is nearly 9 years old and has done 98,000 miles and is a Fiesta.
Again I can get her wheel chair into it but it is a real effort at my age. I am intending to get a new car and if I was not taking Mum into account there are suitable new cars costing about £9,000.
To get something new to easily take the wheel chair the car would cost £14,000 to £15,000.
Mum also wants me to take her on 2 holidays in 2012 both 4 day breaks and she has seen 7 holidays in 2013 all 3 and 4 day breaks which she wants to go on.
As anybody can tell a few thousand £'s are going to have to be spent to make it reasonable for me to keep her at home but the holidays may be a mute point.
I am intending to use some of Mum's money towards the car, the house improvements and for her share of the holiday expenditure.
If things suddenly go wrong and Mum has to go into care would I be liable for all these expenses?.
I am a pensioner myself and I had a neighbour who appeared to be OK and she suddenly had to go into care 4 months later.

Miranda

jeni Sun 12-Aug-12 17:54:15

I had a new car and I had a hoist fitted. Because I had the hoist fitted before I took delivery it counted as an adapted vehicle and I didn't have to pay the vat on the car. I could do this as I have mobility allowance but I don't know if it works if you are just disabled! You would have to ask. It might also be worth asking about fitting a hoist to your present car!

MirandaJane Sun 12-Aug-12 18:08:17

Hi Jeni

I can see what you are saying.
I do not think a hoist would be of any use as it is the amount of room inside the car which causes problems.
When we put the shopping in the car the back seat has to go down and then I have difficulty getting the shopping in.
Really I need a car which is lower on the back and with more room.
My present car has just passed it's MOT but the garage has said it will need some expensive repairs to pass it the next time so I would be replacing it anyway but I would go for a less expensive one if it was not for Mum.
I am on a decent occupational pension as well as a full state pension but I feel Mum's money should be used if it is something purchased for her need.

Miranda

jeni Sun 12-Aug-12 18:15:01

Hoists are quite reasonable. It might be worth approaching a mutability garage to see if a car with hoist 2Nd hand is possible?

MirandaJane Sun 12-Aug-12 18:30:11

Hi Jeni

I agree I could get a second hand car which would take the wheel chair.
I could also tell her to make do with her old bed and to struggle to get into the shower etc.
I have always had new cars and feel as I have worked for my pension I want to continue with them.
What I am saying is if I buy a more expensive new car to accomodate Mum could Social Services object if she has to go into care.
In any case if I went for a second hand car one to accomodate Mum's wheel chair is likely to be more expensive than one which would not if it is the same age.

Miranda

goldengirl Sun 12-Aug-12 22:00:37

I can't see why social services should object! Your mum can spend her money as she wishes and it seems that you are trying to keep her in her own home which can only be a good thing. She's not spending money to avoid having to pay for care, she is paying for care in her own home by making adaptations. She might never have to go into a home so why not help her to make herself comfortable. She'll be saving social services, NHS et al a lot of money!