Junglebellsfrocks: apologies, we have been away and I have only just spotted your comment on this topic. If you should read this........
Well, my husband and I have very different views on this topic. He feels that as he has studied and worked hard, he wants to make life easier for his children now and not make them wait until we die. He says that if his sons-in-law were not hard-working decent young men, he would have had second thoughts as, has been mentioned in this forum, hard-earned money can disappear in a divorce case, which is very sad.
I was less inclined to give so much away and wondered about willing it directly to the grandchildren, although there is also a burden to having money at a young age. I have personal experience of knowing a family who bought their 18-year-old son a sports car and very sadly, he drove too fast and died in an accident. The thought of our grandsons (in particular) having access to that money at an age when they would not be properly responsible for its use, was a great worry so I agreed with my husband's plan.
In direct answer to your question: our house is now quite valuable and I understand that good-quality care homes cost anything from £1,200 per week upwards. This type of calculation gives us some years of care and our daughters have said should we fall short, they will chip in!
I did look into facts and figures of care homes and although they vary considerably in terms of both comfort and cost (as with anything, I guess!) I understand that the average time an elderly person spends in a care home is around two years. We will comfortably meet this criteria if we were to sell our home.
I have had experience of looking after my mother post stroke and general failing health and prior to that, for many years after she was widowed in her forties. There is absolutely no way I wish our daughters to have that responsibilty for us and would do anything for that not to happen. It pretty much destroyed the relationship I had with my mother, who became, as she became frailer in body - but not in mind - very bitter and frustrated with her existence, and understanably too!
I have in mind, a plan to have live-in help and keep nagging my husband to esnure that there is enough disposable income left to ensure that this is a possibilty....
My own health hasn't been the best for much of my life and quite honestly, I don't expect to go on and on into ripe old-age, so money-wise, it makes sense to unburden some of it now.
I realise how fortunate I am in that my situation is such that I have options and understand that many do not. We are generous with our money, both to family and to the wider world too and feel we are using what we have wisely, which is the best we can do.
This may look as if we have zillions and zillions, which we don't but what we do have (much much less than before our gifts! Incidentally, nothing was inherited) should be enough to see us through....I hope!
By the by, I have been advised that we should move house now, while we have the physical capability to sort through nearly fifty-years of possessions etc. Apparently we are missing a trick by not doing it at this stage of our lives. I do wonder if that is code for 'if you don't move soon, when you pop your clogs, we will hire a skip and the entire contents of your home will be gone in a trice' but who knows.....!
) and intend for them to help themselves to these items as soon as. I may well give these away before I am 'harvested' (lovely phrase!) depending on whether I want/need them. My lawyer says I would have to re-make the will if I were to move south of the border to England. Does anyone know if this is the case? Iaincam would perhaps know? I am loathe to do this; after all a will's a will for a' that!