Grandchildren and their money

He sounds sensible, but at 16 he has to learn his own lessons in life. Trust him, he might make mistakes with his money, who hasn't. I hope as well as working hard, he has a good social life and makes friends, it's a balance only he can find.

It's early days. This £500 (now £400) has got to last him through his initial few weeks.
If he has spent it all by the time all his new friends are going out for end of initial training bash it will make him think twice!

Yes, it's a substantial amount but it's his, not theirs. I agree with the other posters who said to let him be. He'll learn by his own mistakes. Better now than down the road. I think his parents need to take pride in his accomplishments and worry less about the money.

Well done, this 16 year old. It is lovely to hear about a young man getting an apprenticeship and a well payed one at that. Good luck to him.

I couldn't have put it better myself Yorkshiregel.

Just to put your minds at rest, going in to the RAF at a young age is not like 'Get some in' (tv programme). The boys are well cared for, if they have problems there is a Welfare Officer they can go to who will give them all the advice they need. They will not be allowed to get themselves in to any bother. Your son is very lucky, he will have his own room and not have to sleep in a barracks where they used to sleep 12 at once. His meals will be very well cooked and they will also teach them to be independent, showing them how to clean and iron their clothes for example. He will love it. The RAF is not like the Army either, they are not half as strict. Good luck to him, I hope he has a wonderful time, and see a lot of interesting places, although there are not so many overseas postings these days. He will make lots of friends and some will last a lifetime.

I think he is showing a maturity by entering into an RAF apprenticeship at 16 and I am sure you are all very proud of him, quite rightly.

I would imagine he is a respectful , sensible type of lad to have chosen the RAF with it's obvious restrictions compared to civilian life and at 16 he has shown he is prepared to accept he will have a certain amount of restriction on his life but hopefully the comradeship and skills he will acquire will stay with him for life and he loves being in the Services.

As parents who love our children I think it is understandable to feel the need to point our children in the right direction but spending £100 on a game is hardly a cardinal sin and he knows that his life for a while will not require too much expenditure on his part so fair enough spend it on something he wanted.

I wish him well and I am sure he will soon have a bank account that will allow him to buy his first car or a holiday with his mates and if he can't enjoy life at 16 then when can he.

He will learn - the RAF know they have 16 year olds working for them and have a duty of care, plus peer pressure will work postively.

As long as he is left to work it out himself, he will learn how ending up not able to go out if you spend too quickly when you have earned a salary, feels and adjust like most of us did if we care to remember.

A sibling of mine spent their entire uni grant of £700.00 in the first 3 days on a musical instrument, then starved and ended up being sent home with pleurisy. Now runs a nursing team, a home and children.

Thanks everyone for your comments.

I wouldn't give my DC any advice unless they specifically asked for it and then I would be very careful indeed what I said and ask what their OH felt!

chrisw I think they have to be there in the background to support him, ask occasionally how everything is going, can they help him with anything.
But the RAF will become his life now, it's not like having a job down the road and going home every night to your parents' home.
I am surprised that they take them so young!
Although I do know people who joined the Navy years ago at 15.

Who uses cheques? A 16 yr old wouldn't know what your talking about. There's a 'new' thing now: it's called electronic transfer.

oh to be 16 again...

And he won't be able to go out so much spending when he starts his training

His Commanding Officer has a duty of care towards him as he/she has to all recruits particularly those under 18.

He is starting out on a new and important phase of his life and his parents can advise but if they become too heavy-handed or try to interfere too much he may resent that, which will have the opposite effect to what they intend.

Ah, the £1,000 pm during the apprenticeship is net presumably of normal deductions and of keep if they do take that off.

Fortunately, he and his parents can discuss such issues and agree to disagree. His parents do not (and could not!) impose their will. I can see your point about buying the game. Fine, he deserves a splurge. As you say, he earned it. I do wonder, though, what you think about the role of parents in their children's lives (in a general sense) when they are still as young as 16? What happened to wise counsel? I would not want to leave any 16 year old to run their own lives without support. Some mistakes are impossible to rectify. I think my GS would feel let down if his parents did that. I still support my children with what I hope is wise counsel and they are in their 40s. They also do they same for me!

Thanks - I wasn't sure if that was just during initial training and whether they deduct keep afterwards when he enters the apprenticeship proper and is earning money monthly.

(or rather that it is provided for, so the money he gets is his own)

The OP says that the RAF deducts his board and lodgings, Jalima.

It is illegal to give cheques for money you do not have to cover it.
Have I missed something, has he been doing that?
Which, of course, would need a stern chat with mum and dad before he gets into trouble.

He isn't living at home so it would be unfair for his DP to take keep off him (although DH always paid his mother his allotment even though he was scarcely at home).

Do they still have to pay an allotment to anyone these days? Do the RAF take money for keep?
They may well have an induction course with advice on how to manage their money

It's the youth culture. mumofmadboys, you are right... they have to learn! Some do and some don't.

Uni students do the same thing. They get their bursaries then blow them on pub crawls and gadgets, then eat beans on toast for the rest of the term.

Too soon we grow old, too late we grow smart!

Games for £100 are what my daughter spends her money on, along with expensive make up and under wear. She pays board tries to save some but earns .....
She is older but still plays games and is I am delighted to say drug and alcohol ( for the most part) free.
It irks that I can't advise her but she earns it not me!
It's how they learn, he will do it his way and surely we all did?

Lilyflower he isn't living at home, and board and lodgings are already deducted from his pay by the RAF.

I don't think apprentices will get that much spare time that they'll be rushing out to spend, spend, spend in a ridiculous way.

foxie I do hope you weren't serious - suspect any approach to RAF would be shrugged off. At 16 he's done well to get an Apprenticeship & it will give him a good grounding for the future. I'm sure they are told of the risks of getting into debt & first time they overstep the mark they will fully appreciate the "wrath of god"

It's not unreasonable to want to buy something special with your first wage packet - didn't we all do it. Also when he sees fellow Apprentices saving or talking about what they are going to save for it will have an impact on him.

As he will learn to drive with the RAF he is likely to want a car, perhaps if you want to give him some financial advice I would gently point out the cost of buying, insuring & running a car.

Please don't lecture him as this will be counter-productive - "in one ear out of the other"