Help refused

I would let her know that the money is there if she
Ever decides to take up your offer. Maybe give her a little bit extra at birthday and Christmas.

You could wait until Christmas or birthday, as suggested, but that may be a long time off. You could tell her that you would like to buy her a 'moving in' present, and what does she need? A washing machine or sofa perhaps, or a fridge/freezer and did she have any particular model in mind? Rather than giving a yes / no option, give her the choice between different things?

I have a son like that. And when my mum died and left me a lot and left them some I decided to top it up...to them. Give them each (son and daughter) extra 10k. My son declined the offer! And it hurt.
Since then he has accepted monetary gifts from me for specific things. He too has always been careful with money always saved up etc so I think that is part of the personality and we should definitely applaud it and keep the money in mind to give whenever it is specifically needed (eg my son accepted some for an expensive builders extension of a room) and towards a new table he was angsting about because of it’s cost. Ironically he works for a bank but doesn’t really believe in credit. And he is very morally responsible like I think your granddaughter is. (To be honest he is a bit Aspergers like some of the best people are! and can’t compute why he would get something for nothing) . he probably also instinctively knows that gifts always have to be returned.

Perhaps you could tell her you'd like to buy her a 'housewarming' present and see what she's lacking when she's settled in, which would be a compromise? And let her know your offer to help financially at a later date, will always be there?

It's possible that she won't accept your offer because she thinks you may need that money yourself at some point so she feels a little guilty taking it from you.

Perhaps suggest that you will keep it for her on standby in case it comes in useful at some point in the future or offer it as a gift on her birthday or Christmas.

Yes save it in an isa for her,for the future,if they ever start a family im sure it will then come in useful,or yes give her bit more for birthdays,or xmas.But accept for now what she says.

How I wish I had this issue! My DD are only too willing to ask for and to take money??‍♀️
But seriously I would give it as a birthday or Christmas gift as others have suggested.

I agree with previous comments. Give her generous Christmas and birthday presents. Perhaps take her shopping and buy her a sofa she wants . I think it is nice to have a grandchild who wants to me independent unlike a lot of youngsters now who expect and think grandparents should give their money to them as they need it more.

JUSTNONEED I Agree with you.
She is proud

I'll have it!! ?

I know when I want to buy my son things he always says no you need the money I can buy my own and that’s true but I get great pleasure from giving. Maybe your GD doesn’t want to take the money incase you need it . I would put it aside maybe in a separate account and say to her if she ever needs it it’s there for her and leave at that

Maybe think about Premium Bonds for her?

oh dear! why should any one , any person have to accept whatever is offered?

yes, I understand how you feel, but why should anyone?

I would feel awkward accepting a gift of money, would feel obliged to visit more or help out when I did not want to.

I would not want the giver to become resentful if I wanted to spend money on something they consider a waste.

I am not saying this is the case here, the only way to find out is to ask.

I think you should respect her wishes,

Just give her generous Xmas and birthday presents.

Try to be happy that she is independent and unwilling to take help.

You could try asking her if there is anything they need and use the money for that.

Or leave it to her in you will.

Respect her wishes and just let her know that the money will be available if she needs it.

Maybe you need to find out exactly why she has refused your offer Watermeadow.

Do you have other grandchildren? Perhaps your GD doesn’t want to receive money from you when the others don’t.

Perhaps she doesn’t want to contribute more to the property than her boyfriend is doing, in case that makes him uncomfortable.

Perhaps she thinks you may need the money yourself in the future.

Whatever her reasons you must respect her choice. (And don’t even think of buying them a sofa!)

FWIW when we have given sums of money over and above the usual birthday presents to our DC, we’ve always given them exactly the same and without any conditions about what the money is to be used for.

Could you say you would like to give her a cheque towards this new chapter of her life and you can afford to and it would give you much pleasure? If she still refuses, perhaps leave it for now.

I would give it to on her Birthday, I have done that with my grandchildren.

Perhaps the issue is in your title ‘Help refused’ ?
If she is an independent young lady she might not need or want help ?

I would wait and give her a generous birthday / Christmas present perhaps .