Wills and leaving to grandchildren

I have 2 sisters. I have 2 children, one sister has 2 children and the other has 4 children making 11 of us over the 2 generations. My parents split everything into 11. I always felt this was unfair but have ‘got over it’. I am going to leave my things 50:50 between my own children with 15% of each child’s portion going to their children (my grandchildren) I think this is fairer.

mumofmadboys

Would it be easier to leave a set sum to be divided between all your grandchildren on the event of your death and to be kept in accounts which can't be accessed till they are 18? That way more money isn't left to your youngest son and you want to avoid any ill feeling if at all possible.

This is the best and fairest way.

We left our will as equal, but we are very generously helping the AC with the most need now, in our lifetime. The ACs know this and accept it. The future of the high income AC is unknown and I would hate our will to cause unhappiness when we die

In their lifetime my parents gave a substantial savings account to our daughter for her 18th birthday. It was agreed that I would look after it so it was not frittered away but would be used fir anything as long as I agreed. My Dd bought a really nice handbag and a few other things. Then whilst at Uni she got the opportunity to go to China for 3 weeks, living with a student at a similar Uni. We couldn’t afford it but her 18th savings money did. It was an experience we are so glad we could allow. Once my parents passed away they left 25% of everything to my daughter and 75% to me. Fortunately we are both only ones so easy. We will do the same when our time comes but it will be split between our 2 grandchildren.

Divide it equally. If you give one more than the other it could cause resentment.

Only if you gave the same amount to the others during their lifetime when they were having their children. Unless one of your children has a special need or disability, or unless one of them has been specifically nasty to you (in which case they don't really deserve anything) imho you should treat them the same in your will. Also if you write your will on the basis they have a 3 year old, you'll have to be ready to change it when they no longer have young kids

I am just dealing with the feelings that my parents’ unequal will has left me with following my father’s recent death. I have not articulated those feelings to anyone except my DH as I am very keen not to sour relations with my brother. But those feelings are there, and bring up quite bitter memories of previous unequal treatment. So my advice would be to leave the estate to be divided equally; by all means leave bequests to DG but the residue should be divided equally between DC.

IMO you should leave your will as it is with each of your AC receiving the same.

Having experienced the situation you mention through my husbands family, I would strongly recommend that you leave things as you originally intended.

Do everything equally. People's circumstances in life can change for the better or worse in an instant.

My daughter has 2 children and my son has no children. I have left my estate to be split 50/50 between my son and daughter. I would never favour one of my children over the other just because they have children. I'm sure my grandchildren will benefit indirectly from their mothers inheritance when the time comes.

I'm in the same position I have 3 sons only one of which has a 3yr old son. I spoke to my other 2 boys and discussed it with them. Both then agreed they wouldn't mind me leaving something to my grandson. I decided to split it so that all 3 sons get the same and little man gets a portion held until he's 21 when it'll be useful.

Treat your children equal is my opinion. I believe you can bequeath grandchildren to benefit when they reach a set age up to 25 years old (when they have matured and know what they want) without setting up an actual trust. The executors are responsible to invest such proceeds. Quite simple I believe, and your existing will can be altered very quickly and cheaply by the same solitor you originally used. Give it further thought, and perhaps speak to your solicitor.

Keep it as it is,the ones with children will in later life have their children to support and hopefully care for them.
The ones that don't have won't have this advantage

My mum has left a lump sum to each adult GC with balance split between sister (3 AC) & myself (1 AC). Seems fair to me!

I think the best way is to leave 10% of the total estate (or whatever you decide) to be split between all the grandchildren at your death. Then the parents can decide how to use it. I would think your own children would expect something to be passed down to your grandchildren.

No, no way can you treat one more or better than the others. Your memory will ling on bitterly with whichever you have favoured. I know this from experience within my family.
Treat each one the same regardless of their circumstances.

Having experienced a situation where siblings did not inherit equal amounts and the upset, hard feelings and estrangement that it ultimately caused I would say no, do not change the will.

Whatever their own personal circumstances each one of your AC should be treated equally.

my mother left all ( to be fair not a great deal as she never owned a property) to my brother . i do not resent that as i was in a far financial position than my brother. i think you need to figure out how the others would feel - would it cause any bad feeling between siblings?
i have a friend that had extra financila support during the mother's lifetime and not in the will. so there are other ways around this if you think it would cause resentment

Should have added, we updated our wills at the beginning of lockdown one - in case!
One dd has 3 small dcs, the other, though happily partnered, doesn’t want children.

We’ve left a certain sum to each Gdc, not in trust but to go into their savings/ISA accounts, and the remainder, after a few other small bequests, to be divided equally between dds.

In a way I feel that the dd with children could do with a bigger share, but we’ve always treated them absolutely equally so it didn’t seem right to change that now, and I’m sure that dd would not expect us to.

Our estate ( if indeed there’ll be any left!) will be split into quarters. A quarter each for our 3 children and a quarter divided between our 6 grandchildren.

How about leaving certain sums to the children’s parents, for the benefit of the children, but to be used at the parents’ discretion? So it could be used to help pay for music or ballet lessons, school trips, maybe to help pay for family holidays, etc.

We did that recently when updating our will, for the benefit of a child we know with special needs. So not to the child directly, but to be spent as the parents (who are not well off) see fit. And if that means family holidays, we’re happy with that.

My mil left part of her estate to be divided amongst her GC and GGC. It was a lovely thought and it hasn’t caused any upset in our family. However, some of the GGC weren’t born at the time of her death so they don’t have the small financial cushion that their cousins and siblings will have to start out upon life.

We considered doing something similar for our GC but in the end, it seemed too fraught with the possibility of upset so it’s a simple straight split between our DC.

Thank you for your answers - think I’ll be leaving my will as it is at the moment. It’s really useful to hear other’s views and everyone is saying roughly the same!

My Mum arranged for 10% of her legacy to be divided between any grandchildren and the rest divided equally between the ACs. You could choose an appropriate percentage so that whatever the legacy is the division will be balanced the same? It worked well in our family