Moral guidance please, should we claim benefits just because we can?

Although I make the suggestion with the assumption you’re not Uber rich!

I do not think you should deny yourself and your husband any help that you are entitled to.

I imagine he is around your age and coping with things in this very trying situation for you both. Using the extra money to pay a cleaner or gardener or for taxis instead of driving yourselves might make a significant difference.

If you feel you are comfortably enough off to pay these things yourselves, you might want to consider that you unfortunately may need more help as time goes by.

In your place, I would be worrying about how my husband would cope when the inevitable day comes where he has to manage without me - extra money might just be helpful then, and if not, he can always denote it to cancer research in your name, or some other charity of your choice.

You sound so brave in this very sad and difficult time, please take the help you can get to make this time as good as it can be.

Wishing you the very best, and yes, do claim. AA is “universal” in that it’s not means tested. I finally persuaded my 90 + year old parents to claim it a couple of years ago. They still feel surprised that they get it and slightly unentitled to it but my view is that they paid into the system for all their working lives and now it’s time for the system to pay back a little. The thing with AA is that you can spend it on whatever you like - help around the house etc or a few treats, so really worth getting.

Welcome Janet.
Do I discern correctly from your mention of ‘having a talk’ with your DH that you’re experiencing a little opposition from that quarter?
If so, it’s time to read the assertiveness handbook and get your way! Good luck!
Apologies if I’m wrong!

Claim it

Save it or splurge and treat you and your husband to something special. A holiday post lockdown?!

Thank you, all of you, I have read every word and will have a talk with Himself about it!
I’ve been on treatment on and off for the past 15 months to help control symptoms, but there are only so many options, so maybe it’s time now to accept the need for help.
I’ve only recently joined gransnet - you are a lovely funny group!

My mum gets attendance allowance as she has COPD. As she can't manage to use buses she uses it for taxis to visit my dad who is in a care home and for shopping and medical appointments

Whether you get a benefit and at what rate depends on how good you are at answering the questions on the form! Disgraceful - but very true! After retirement from my senior nursing post, I worked as a volunteer welfare benefits advisor for my local Law Centre, where I helped many people to successfully claim the benefits to which they were entitled! Form filling is a minefield for most people, but fortunately I am extremely articulate, and therefore it is something I am very good at! I decided, after retirement, that I should put my skills to good use in helping others less fortunate than myself! I did it for more than 30 years as a Nurse, so for me, it's a natural progression! No-one should go without because of lack of information or knowledge!

Definitely claim it! Both my parents had terminal cancer and claimed ! It was that little bit extra for a taxi or a gardener/cleaner and enabled them to stay at home prior to hospice!
Please take it as you have paid for it and it is not means tested! Have you got a blue badge as well ?
It is not being grabbing but you can use the extra wisely I am sure

Sorry to hear this........you sound so lovely despite your situation. Why don’t you get the AA and have a little treat for your husband and yourself, something that you would never have thought of doing......book yourself into a Hotel/Spa and get spoiled....

Claim it. And by using it to, for example, pay for help in the home you are not only taking chores off your husband but also helping a local person get by during these hard times.

Please claim your allowance, and don't feel guilty. There is so much good , helpful advice here.
I wish you all the best with your treatment

I know it's a weekly allowance. My own father gets. It gives him the extra for a taxi to get to any doctors + hospital appointments. He has a cleaner from agency for 2 hours cleaning one day and + on another day a shopper lady from same agency. Or get this and donate an amount a month to a charity on a direct debit such as the Salvation Army or the nhs or a local hospice. But at this time realise the government is bailing out lots of self-employed and the various closed stores/restaurants on the 80% furlough schemes.

My late mother-in-law claimed attendance allowance even though she was quite well off. It is a question of entitlement rather than need. At the time that we applied for the allowance on my MIL's behalf I spoke to someone in what was then Help the Aged. I was told that if there were lower numbers of people applying for the allowance the Dept of Work & Pensions might reduce the future budget for it on the basis of what could be perceived as a lower need.
At the end of the day it is a personal decision but you might be glad of it as time goes by. MIL lived to 101 and attendance allowance was a great help with the little extras in care provision.

Claim it. Sadly if you should need care it will not be much and will allow you to pay for services that care workers do not do.

Or if you are lucky enough to find you do not need it donate it to a local food bank or other charitable cause.

Agreed, you sound like a lovely lady. Sorry about your situation. Don't feel any guilt for claiming, that money is earmarked, no-one else will benefit directly if you don't claim it. Like others said, you can always give it to a good cause if you later find you didn't need it. Best wishes.

I don’t like the constant reference to ‘need’ when it comes to benefits. Who can say what someone else needs? One person’s ’managing’ can create someone else’s ‘luxury’. The point is that this is an entitlement, and the more people who treat claiming entitlements as a moral dilemma, the more stigma will be attached. Claim it and spend it on whatever you wish.

All the best with your treatment - I wish you well.

I think I would claim it in your position so that everything is in place, in case you do really need it eventually.

If you feel uncomfortable, donate the money to a good cause perhaps.

You could use it to pay a cleaner, as others have said, so your husband can spend more time with you.

I am truly sorry to learn of your diagnosis.

Id say claim it. As others have said it can pay a cleaner/gardener/taxis to the hospital etc.

Sending you all my sympathy and good wishes. I do think you should claim it, just in case you do need it, and in the meantime there are plenty of good causes you could pass it on to.

I love your positivity, and do hope that your treatment works out well for you.

I’d say claim Attendance Allowance and use it to make what time you have left a little more special. But you should probably be aware that the curtain-twitchers and busybodies of this world may be inwardly accusing you of fraud for claiming a benefit you may not be using they way they think you ought to use it.

Attendance Allowance, like PIP, is not a means tested benefit! The means tested benefit for those in ill health is ESA, which depending on your financial circumstances can be either income-related or contribution based! However, ESA stops as soon as you are eligible to claim your State Pension, and this is the case whether you actually claim your pension or choose to defer it! The UK benefits system is a proverbial minefield, but help is available out there for people who need to make a claim! Citizens Advice are excellent and some local Law Centres have welfare benefit advisors. No-one should have to do without a benefit they are entitled to because they don't have sufficient knowledge of the benefits system!

So sorry to hear you are having to cope with such a worry but it sounds as if you are managing to think things out admirably well.

I should claim what you need and adjust as time goes by. Start now to set the scene and as things will probably take time to get through the system, you can update as you go along. That would be easier than having to start from scratch later, when you will need to reactivate the opportunity. You are certainly entitled to the help you have insured for over your lifetime.

Yes you should claim it
Your husband may cope now but what would happen if, god forbid, he had an accident
If you don’t claim now and get it established you may have issues claiming later if the rules change again
Like others sai, you can always donate it to charity but you have paid this in taxes over the years so regard it as “your” money and if you want to use it for good causes then do so! Better to go to a gift for a local hospital than another MPs’ pay rise!

We claimed PIP under the DS1500
Rules and for the full amount. My husband amazingly loved for nine years with a terminal diagnosis but the truth was he could have died at any time. It was a difficult experience. The PIP gave us some extra money for gardener and treats to make life easier. We got a blue badge too which was brilliant