Grandchildren in care

I suspect the ‘load of nonsense’ is actually some very serious concerns and that is why the OP has not returned to clarify the issue. Dismissing SS’s reasons for not placing children with their grandmother as ‘nonsense’ underlines the validity of those reasons.

What is this load of nonsense?

When foster kids are available for adoption, there are usually very serious reasons why they cannot ever be reunited with their family of origin

Lots of info missing here

I hope your DD has a robust safety plan in place to support her mental health ....make sure she has crisis team contact number ....I'm sure its very difficult supporting your DD from a distance

Iam64

LOUISA, sky pixie says in her OP that she ‘failed the assessment due to the being 150 miles from me and a load of nonsense’

The focus of the Family Court is to make decisions based on the assessed needs of the children. Their wishes and feelings will be considered. If the care plan is adoption, every other option will have been considered in detail. Contact arrangements are always complex for this group of children

If an ICO is in place then the protocol will always be dual planning ....its not a given that every other option will have been explored as yet....just that they need to get ahead with an adoption plan if that's how things pan out

My heart goes out to you at this stressful time. I have no personal experience of a situation such as this. I understand you must be so concerned about your GC. There is some good advice here please seek advice from a family solicitor and look after yourself too.

LOUISA, sky pixie says in her OP that she ‘failed the assessment due to the being 150 miles from me and a load of nonsense’

The focus of the Family Court is to make decisions based on the assessed needs of the children. Their wishes and feelings will be considered. If the care plan is adoption, every other option will have been considered in detail. Contact arrangements are always complex for this group of children

Have childrens services completed an assessment on you OP ?

I have no experience of this skypixie, however my instinctive response is that even if your GC are adopted you should not have to loose contact with them . Let the social workers know how important this is to you. Your GCs security and happiness is the priority now and for the future.
I can't imagine the distress you are in just now and I wish you and your GC peace and contentment for the future. 💐💐

If the children are the subject of care proceedings, they will be represented by a Children’s Guardian who will instruct an experienced solicitor on their behalf. The CG will also interview significant people in the lives of the children, especially relatives.
Have you attended Court hearings?
I expect the ‘nonsense’ you mention is more significant in planning for your grandchildren than distance.

If it's deemed that the children would be better not with you, Skypixie, the decision will have been made with the best interests of the children in mind. The duty of all professionals in such sad cases is to consider the welfare of the children only. Their needs, and not those of the parent, are paramount. I am so sorry that you find yourself in this situation, but what you say about your daughter's fragility suggests that this might be the only safe solution.

Yes, so can I.

A friend of mine is a Senior Nurse and her husband has his own business and is very involved with the church.
She had a daughter from her first marriage who had two small boys, no husband and she was a drug addict.

She was sent to prison for several years for attacking and robbing a shopkeeper. Her boys were taken into care with a view to adoption. My friend and her husband said they would happily take them but social services felt they needed a fresh start because when the mother came out of prison she would always be in and out of their lives. They said they had had no stability in their short lives and deserved a clean slate away from their mother. I can understand that now.

I am so sorry that you are going through this One of the things you must discuss with the social workers is you keeping contact with the children, should they be adopted. Of course at the moment you would want to look after them yourself, but failing that, then being able to be part of their lives is something you need to talk about.
This centre has long experience in this field and you may find them helpful:
www.childrenslegalcentre.com/

I hope that within the advice here you can find something helpful to you.

FRG a good resource
If relatives are made parties in proceedings, the judge often - usually asks the local authority to fund their legal costs

There is an organisation called Family Rights Group...I know that quite often costs for a solicitor can be prohibitive.
They can advise parents, grandparents, relatives, friends and kinship carers who are involved with children’s services in England or need their help.
I'd suggest contacting them.

But the lawyer must have the full picture in order to help. They must know exactly why SS refused your request. And it’s important to acknowledge that it’s the best interests of the children which are paramount, not your daughter’s.

Are your grandchildren the subjects of care proceedings? If so, they will be represented by an independent Children’s Guardian who will instruct an experienced lawyer to represent them.
It shouldn’t happen but sometimes parents agree to a voluntary care arrangement to avoid court. Court benefits all the parties, especially in ensuring the children’s needs are central. If care proceedings are ongoing, you can ask to be a party. If you haven’t already, see a solicitor who is registered with the children’s panel.

The load of nonsense is probably the key problem, rather than distance. A good lawyer will help you.

Skypixie - how sad !I just hope you will be able to see your grandchildren soon .

Unless there is good reason not to allow contact, there shouldn’t be a problem seeing your grandchildren by agreement with SS.

I have no experience in this area pixie but I would like to express my sympathy for your pain and hope that something will allow you to see your grandchildren soon.

I think it is important to understand what the load of nonsense is as this is clearly a major factor in their decision. If you understand what these factors are, then you can think about addressing them. They are likely to be important ones as care within the family is often the favoured option.

I understand how difficult this is for you and your daughter and fir the children too of course,
If your GC were taken in to care recently it would be surprising if adoption is already being considered. Usually they aim to reunite children with parents or close family but it depends on the reasons why they were removed.
Social services have a responsibility for children who may be at risk and assuming your daughter has access to them, living with you 150 miles away is probably impractical as it’s too far.
Let the authorities know you wish to keep in contact with the children. Ask questions, keep calm don’t get angry and encourage your daughter to work with them.
I hope things work out for you all.

What was the ‘load of nonsense’ Skypixie?

Are you absolutely sure you will be able to cope with three young boys? I ask because I was involved with a case where the grandparents took on their two young grandsons, and it nearly broke them; they had had a disturbed childhood, their mother being on drugs and their father who simply walked away into a new marriage. All the rest of the family was involved, the schools helped as much as possible, but it was exhausting and also very expensive and drained all their savings.
I do wish you good luck if you are able to take them on.

The British Family Courts are always keen to place children with other family members wherever possible before they make Local Authority Care Orders or (absolute last resort) Adoption Orders. So as a willing and able gp you should already be ahead of other options -all things being equal-.
You should make an appointment to see a Family Solicitor as soon as possible and explain to them what the Social Services initially objected to in your original bid to look after your grandchildren, and don't withold any information from them (whether or not you deem it to be relevant).
The Solicitors will then be able to give you advice as to whether the case is worth pursuing and guide you accordingly.
Best of luck!