How can you NOT KNOW you are pregnant?

Marelli How terribly hard. Society was so different then. You have your wonderful daughter and you are such a strong, steadfast and delightful woman. How did you do with your O levels and the baggy jumper?

Nelliemoser, sending calming thoughts over the ether to you! It can't be long now!
gillybob, well done to you, for not giving up under the strain of pressures from your parents. I had my daughter when I was 16. I hid my bump under a large jumper as I sat my 'O' levels, then, when when I asked my mum to write me a note to be excused gym, she asked why....? I remember looking at her wordlessly. She flew into a temper and I never did go back to school. My dad was informed when he got back from work and that was that! However, my lovely girl will be 46 next week, and I didn't give in to my parents who told me that she MUST be adopted. I just got married to the father - then discovered that he was a cruel bully. However, if I hadn't gone through with the marriage (long divorced) my daughter would have been adopted, so it was worth it. I remember my father telling me that now I'd had a baby, I'd be looked on as easy by other boys...! I've actually only just remembered that conversation - and it's made me feel so angry (even now) to think that he could say that to me.

I have to say that I knew I was pregnant within hours if not minutes, but had four pregnancy tests at the GPs before they agreed with me. Absentdaughter is proof that I was right.

You have a wonderful time ahead Nelliem, Grandchildren are such a delight. I know that mine have added so much to my life. The last few days of waiting for them to arrive is not easy,but is soon forgotten when you can hold them. Good luck!

I too had very light periods Grannyeggs. There were no visible signs of pregnancy for me at all.

You are so right whenim64 . One of my grannies (amazingly the one I would have thought would have taken it the hardest) exclaimed that babies always bring joy and told my mum to "get a grip" of herself. Mind you the same granny said that there was no way I was getting in her front door without being "churched" !!

Years later when I was pregnant with my daughter who was also born early at 5lb exactly I wondered how I could have not known I was pregnant. Mind you I still didn't have much of a bump and came out of hospital in jeans.

Glad to hear things moved on for you Grannyeggs. I hope your next marriage was happier.

My Dd is now a wonderful woman of 45, I am immensely proud of her, and can not imagine life without her. I married the Father, he was my first husband, we went on to have two other children, the marriage was not a happy one, he was a verbal bully. he too was only 19 when it happened, and I was 7 months. Pregnant when we married.

* gillybob* what a shock for everyone, but you weren't the first and it happens frequently even now. You made the most of your circumstances and it sounds like your lovely son did all the mediation. Who can resist a baby?

Grannyeggs* I hope it all turned out ok for you, too?

Amazing stories - good to hear from you again gilly

grannyeggs I think even those of us who didn't get pregnant were pretty stupid and naive at 19

I will confess I was a pregnant and unmarried 19 year old, and I was in self denial for months. I was young and fit and did not look in the least bit pregnant for 6 months, my periods were very light and of course eventually had to admit I was pregnant. I think it was sheer terror om my part that made me deny it even to myself. the family did not greet the news with unbridled joy, but I think I thought I would be thrown into the streets. I blush now to think how stupid and naive I was.

I've always been sceptical about claims that the woman in question didn't realise she was pregnant, but your story has changed my mind, gillybob! I think the problem is that as most of us have experienced pregnancy, we're all pretty sure we'd recognise the symptoms, but that was our own experience and we have to accept that for some women the experience can be completely different.
It sounds as though you coped admirably, gillybob, in difficult circumstances.

My mum went crazy shysal. She found it very difficult to cope with the shock and the shame but eventually pulled herself together and fell in love with her grandson. Mind you there was never an option for me to stay "at home". Ny dad was a tidy freak who had to come in from work to a tidy organized house with dinner on the table. A baby and all the stuff that comes with it would have sent him over the edge.

Hope it all goes well nellie.
And that you have a wonderful time helping your DD after the baby comes.
I went to stay with my DD after my DGD was born, and DSiL had gone back to work and it was one of the happiest weeks of my life.

gillybob this thread was made for you! What a shock you must have had, how did you cope and what did your mum say?

Hi petallus Looking back I was very naive and honestly didn't have a clue. My parents went crazy (my mum had a bit of a breakdown) and I was forced persuaded to marry the father. The "marriage" lasted less than a year before he left me quite literally holding the baby.

On the positive side I grew up very quickly and was a very responsible single parent. I worked full time and rented a lovely little flat (although in a very rough area). My son was the most gentle natured beautiful baby who eventually melted my mums heart.

My sister at the time was 13 and talking about it recently she said that the day after he was born, my mum was having the hysterics, my dad was ranting and raving, my gran was ringing her hands and sobbing (proclaiming that I was ruined) and my sister and her friend were jumping for joy !

Nellie good luck. So hard having to just wait and not able to go in and do/say anything to help. Breathe, breathe, breathe, you not her!

Wow gillybob that's some experience you went through.

If you don't mind me asking, how did it turn out?

Good luck NellieM, keep calm and have a
Positive thoughts are on their way....

I haven't been around for a while but felt I had to comment on this subject.

At 18 I was 5ft 6inches and weighed around 8 and a half stone. I worked in a large office with mainly all women. I had no idea I was pregnant at all until one day a technician was changing some tube lights above my head. I was working away and the light cover fell and literally knocked me off my chair. We all laughed it off but I felt a bit weird. Suddenly had strange cramps in my legs and tummy. I was given some pain killers and carried on working my shift. I then got the bus home (stood all the way as the bus was really busy) and when I got home (my mums) I went to lie down as didn't feel too well. A couple of hours later I shouted to my mum that I was having a wee and it wouldn't stop coming !! An hour and an ambulance later 1 small baby boy weighing less than 5lbs .

I had no idea, I wore my ordinary clothes, I wasn't overweight....

I cannot undestand this either. Perhaps if the mother is very obese, but there is no feeling that compares with someone inside kicking you and elbows or heels shooting across inside your belly I have never had wind that felt like that. Maybe very young and naive girls or persons in complete denial.

My DD is now 1 day late with my 1st grandchild, seeing the size she was a couple of weeks ago you could hardly have missed her belly being a baby bump. Please send calming thoughts to me over the next few days.

I am soon to see someone who didn't know she was pregnant until very late on. She had been told she had a condition which would make it impossible to ever conceive so it is no wonder she had no idea.

In both my pregnancies I had a slight 'show' a few times , which could have been thought to be periods, so I can partly understand someone not knowing. Some women do not get breast changes either. In my case the constant nausea would have been a give-away!

I worked alongside a 43 year old woman who was not aware she was pregnant. She had few periods, no other children to give clues that her body was changing, and she didn't look pregnant to anyone else. She got stomach pains and thought she might have appendicitis, and gave birth soon after getting to A and E. the baby was full term and weighed over 7 lbs. She and her husband were thrilled to bits. They had been married over 20 years.

Many years ago I worked for a company that included private health insurance as part of the pay package. One afternoon, all the women in my department trotted off for a well-woman check-up. One of us discovered, to her great surprise and delight, that she was seven months pregnant.