Jimmy Savile

Just wish this had been revealed before he died then he could suffer the consequences...

ps merlotgran yes I do believe the allegations because I always wondered about him...bit weird...

Sandi Toksvig has said that she was groped while on air at BBC Radio.

Is this the start of a flood BBC women? I think there may be a few ageing DJs etc who are wondering if they need to be preparing one of those catch-all injunctions

I will be sorry if it turns out that John Peel was part of it.
Footballers are notorious for attracting young girls, but I think the girls are complicit - the WAG life seems to be the highest aim of some girls.

Apparently Freddie Starr tried to get one, but it was refused....

They can hardly claim that Sandi Toksvig was a compliant partner.

Some men appear to view lesbians as a challenge!
One lesbian friend of mine was often told that all she needed was 'the man for the job'. (Meaning the speaker, of course).

As a man, I think we men all have it within us to be "abusers",

It is our upbringing, moral values, sense of right and wrong, natural inhibitions and outside influences that stop us from becoming these monsters who are around us.

I had a personal encounter with one of these characters at the age of fourteen, just started my first job and very naieve about life in the wide world!
That experience haunted me for many years afterward.

I was unable to speak of it to anyone for many years until one day while watching a programme on the subject of abuse, i was able to tell my wife.

Incidently my abuser was an Australian working over here, he was also a Catholic. and gave me a "holy candle" afterwards, saying I should not tell anybody about him. As I say, it greatly affected my life for a long time!

It is only my anonymity on here that I'm able to write this!

There are also women abusers, to whom, presumably, my comments would also apply.

I think men and boys who are abused, whether by other men or women, suffer greatly, partly because they are embarrassed to tell anyone, and partly because they feel they should have been able to protect themselves. How good it was that you were able to confide in someone at last, Gramps.

I have a wonderful companion /wife, married now for fifty seven years.
Thank you Greatnan for your response!

I hope it helped just a little to lay that ghost gramps - a very honest posting.

We can but hope that now that society is so much more open about sex, both men and women, boys and girls, will feel able to tell someone if they are molested. Possibly not a parent, but a teacher or family friend.
I don't think most young people had the vocabulary to explain what had happened to them in the past.

Yes JessM

It is a relief to be able to be free of a feeling of being "held" by a phantom from the past!

I feel free on here to release my fears of the past.
Thank you!

gramps
From the most rancourous old bird on gransnet.

Some people would question your claim to that title!

gramps. What you've said has prompted me to say something that I'd been thinking about these revelations about Savile. I seem to remember when I was young that the big fear that parents had was abuse by gay men to young boys. This was before it was possible for gay men to 'come out' and their lives were shrouded in guilt and cover ups. I don't know if you've seen the film 'Oranges and Sunshine' about the children that were taken to Australia from childrens homes for a 'better life'. Many of the boys were abused by the priests at the childrens homes that they went to and a social worker in Nottingham helped many of them find their families and come to terms with the abuse they suffered. A painful film to watch. I'm so glad you've been able to share your horrible experience with us and find some comfort in doing so. Big hug.

Big hug gramps. I read somewhere today (can't remember where) that some of the charities are removing JS' name from their profile and donating money to child abuse charities. A small comfort.

Yes, crimson I remember that film very well.
She, Margaret Humphfreys ( I think ) received a CBE for her work.
A lady to be very much admired.

Grannyknot, there was something on the news about that today. Small comfort perhaps, but at least the money's going in the right direction.
Gramps, I'm so sorry to hear about what happened when you were younger, and how good it is that you were able to talk it away with your wife. Many years ago, when we first got together, my DH told me that something had happened to him (briefly) when he was a youth. He'd been given a lift by an older man who 'made a pass' at him when driving. DH jumped out of the car at traffic lights and ran away. I don't think he told anyone about it until he felt he could tell me many years later. He said he saw the man a few weeks later when he was out with his friends, but was too embarrassed to mention it to them.

gramps good that you've been able to let it out at last.

Lovely gramps - I trust that Mrs gramps won't mind if I give you a virtual hug.

Glad gramps that your wife was there to understand what this meant to you. Well done for rising above it.

Dear Friends,
Many thanks for your kind words, and Mrs. G has no probs with genuine friendly hugs soop.

You are a terrific "bunch" of Ladies, and I thank you again for your supporting posts. This episode in my life closed many years ago now. At that time I felt terrific anger along with other feelings.

I thinks it's excellent that these women speaking up has released so much pent up angst. Much cleansing of spirits. So much has been bottled up for too long.