Like others on here my OH disappeared with a local barmaid whose husband worked in Saudi Arabia (she once complained to me that 'my husband only sends me 1,000 a month !) ...that didn't include the mortgage which he paid ! She saw in my husband a successful business man (broker at LLoyds) earning a good salary, two new cars a lovely house a daughter at private school and she wanted that.
However what she DIDN't see was that my husband with successful career (director of company earning very good
salary). Of the two new cars, one was his company car and mine was on loan from an aunt who won it but did not drive ! Daughter at private school ...fees paid by my saving my salary working at a solicitors part time school hours. She never saw that he was a compulsive gambler an my salary paid for the mortgag and most of the bills .....from his earnins we saw very litte, and what he did have went to the Court to pay various attachment to earnings order for his gambling debts......
SO, when he eventually left I took the house and all its contents ....from which I paid off all his outstanding gambling debts (to save him from threats from various 'heavies# who used to call round ...why I did, I really don't know !) Daughter and I then had to move 250 miles away where we could afford to buy a house outright. No more private school, no maintenance, no contact with daughter ,,,no cards on birthday or Christmas, nothing ! Apart from her paternal grandparents who took her on a holiday every year ..no support whatever from anywhere .......gave her everything I could ...even sending cards and presents 'from daddy'.....now she has not spoken to me for ten years ....probably back in touch with her father who may have told her various lies about me (I know he told someone the house was taken off him to pay maintenance ..it wasn't ! The child support agency told me they could get nothing from him as by then he had married the other woman, had twins (they already had one child, and she had one of her own as well) he had been sacked for embezzelement to fund his gambling lost his house and was living in a b & b (he then got lucky and was given two council houses knocked into one and benefits ! he then had a triple by pass !) so as my mother used to say, what goes around comes around, Wouldn't have done me much good going back to court to ask for more ....nothing more than nothing to be had ! So NO I don't blame her if nothing was signed off ....why should she and the children suffer if the ex decided he wanted to reduce his payments ! Good luck to her !