confused about 'Love'

I should add that in a local pub the other day the landlady called everybody, young or old, gorgeous a term I have never heard in the area, although to be fair the landlady is fairly new and from down south so it may be something imported into the dark north.

I think it would only be 'gender neutral if men called other men 'love',

In my previous line of work as an engineer, this was a term used by another engineer to males or females and nobody took offense.

I tend to think that in some area's of the country people can become offended by the most simplistic friendly statement.

Bab is used quite a lot here. A young lad called me it once. I wasn't the least bit offended!

Even better, indeispensable, might be: "Yer what, luv?" in response to such silly tosh.

M'love is a common term of endearment in these parts. And m'duck. 'Pet' which is more north eastern has even crept in, as has bab, which is more Brummie/Midlands.

My Mum called most people darling. I use that a lot too. I love warm greetings. I am not offended at all by them.

You can't live in the north-west and object to people saying Sorry, luv!

What a miserable, colourless and dowdy world it will be when the PC brigade have successfully eliminated general terms of greetings and endearment to each other. No more "cock sparrers"; hen; duck; love; chuck; pet etc. Wonder what they'll find to be offended about then?

Pet, Hen, Hinnie, here in the frozen North East. No objections from me because people are simply being friendly and, I truly believe, respectful when they use these terms. It was 'me duck' when I lived in Derby.

"Perhaps it's acceptable in the north!"

Good grief where on earth do some people live if they don't know colloquial speak is used everywhere.

It is acceptable or not to the individual, nothing to with where we live. Speaking as a individual from Somerset , now living in the Midlands I don't give a hoot if and when I am addressed as love, dear etc. I like it actually.

Here in the Black Country everyone is "me lover", male and female, black or white! Political correctness not arrived yet.

It's rather demean ing and belittling to be called love or dear. Perhaps it's acceptable in the north.

When we lived in the NW we knew we'd landed back at Manchester when we were called love.
If it happens to him again his response should be along the lines of, having slowly looked her up and down, Sorry, I can see you're no-one's love.

I think there is too much political correctness in everything these days i dont mind being called love, or any other term of endearment if its usual in the area im in i wouldnt take offence, but like some others for some reason i dont like being called dearIt does sound condescending for some reason
Also agree with not being called darling in hospital
In some areas men call everyone love,i remember hearing my brother who lived in Huddersfield call another man love, didnt realise everyone in that area did ,to men or women

Lilypops I agree! you've hit one of my irritation buttons, I hate being called "Darlin" and especially in hospital the patronising "Do this for me Darlin'". It's a certain type of person who says it. I dare not describe. Others treat you as if you are sensible and with respect. I was particularly upset when the Carers started calling my mother "Darlin". I did ask them to use her name and one of them told me 'She likes it". In fact I don't think she knew what it was about. It was a hard time, my mother would have hated it before she had Alzheimer's, and would have corrected their pronunciation too.

It's a funny world. I like people being friendly, "love" "pet" "duck" are just affectionate terms and oil the wheels of daily life, until of course, they sound patronising, or until someone thinks they are sexist. Such a shame your sweet DH was misunderstood. Upon which note I give my funny story. A colleague of mine came to work in Derby. He used a lot of taxis. Born in Turkey, though living here many years, sometimes he was puzzled by our ways or language. "How do the Taxi Drivers know I'm a Doctor even when I'm not going to the Hospital?" he asked me. "Why?'" says I. "They always call me 'Doc'". Aha! Methinks. In Derbyshire, everyone calls you "Duck" but with their regional accent, to a man who lived 20 years in London, it sounds like "Doc!"

Here on Merseyside "love" is used so often in conversation and I am never offended by it,I would far rather be acknowledged by some term of endearment than ignored.

I don't mind being called love but not by people/shop assistants younger than me, also I cannot bear being called Sweetheart by anyone young enough to be my grandchildren, That does sound condescening, like I am a silly old doddery bat ,

NonnaW I so agree about hating 'dear'. Our old next door neighbour, a pompous medic, called me dear a few times and he was only 10 years younger than me! I'm very happy with most terms of endearment, 'love' especially as I'm from a Lancastrian family who used it all the time when I was growing up.

I think it was very rude and unkind of that woman to be so disparaging and frankly ridiculous. When I was first married DH and I lived in deepest Cornwall, and I can remember being slightly taken aback at ' My lover'! When we left two years later, I would have been mortified NOT to be referred to like this!
I really don't mind how anyone refers to me, so long as its not with malice. I have to admit though that I do find 'bless' a bit much!

I’m happy for anyone to call me love, or any of the other teams mentioned, with one exception. For some reason, I find the word dear patronising. Strange, because I used to work with a woman who called everyone dear, and I had no problem with that, but maybe that’s because she was older than most other people there.

vampirequeen same goes for 'flower' sadly.

'Love' is used regularly around here along with 'pet/petal'. When I was working I was told to stop calling children 'petal' as it was a form of disrespect. I don't think either me or the children thought of it in that way but apparently OFSTED didn't like it.

It doesn't bother me, one way or the other. Your husband said it with benign and innocent intentions. Such a shame he was given an ear bashing.

Where I live everyone and anybody calls each other love. I think it's a same it's seen as anything other than a friendly acknowledgement that you exist.

How can something be sexist if both men and women use/say words such as My Lover, Babber, Lovely, Darling, Love, Honey, Pet, Dear.

To my way of thinking most of these words are simply colloquial speak .

There is of course also the fact not everybody uses colloquial dialects , common parlance, informal language and it is most likely they will be the ones who find it upsetting because it simply is not a normal way to communicate in their experience . Having said that the like or dislike of using common endearments /language greatly varies and crosses all sections of the population .

Is it sexist though or nothing more than common speak if both sexes use such words? Each to his/her own I suppose.