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Brexit dividing my family.

(432 Posts)
iluvsylvanianfamilies51 Fri 06-Dec-19 13:10:03

I voted leave in 2016 and had no idea it would come to this. I really think this country has never felt more divided. Walking on eggshells when discussing things with friends, family, neighbours. Not wanting to offend but not wanting to back down. It is horrible.

What makes me sad is that it feels like families are splintered and there's so much resentment. Grandkids all voted remain and kids voted remain and leave. All have arguments about it all the time and I feel them getting more closed off to each other.I t is unbearably sad. We shouldnt be divided like this.

I'm sure others feel the same but the reason I post is because my granddaughter sent me this video and I think it articulates it really well. You may not like Labour or momentum but I think we will agree that this tension between leave/remain leaves us weaker. And when I voted in 2016 I didn't think it would be so drawn out. I feel embarrassed about that

twitter.com/PeoplesMomentum/status/1202573131606573056

I have been on the fence about who to vote for but I despise Johnson for his comments on single mothers (AND his racism!) and I think Labour are the best chance we have to get a better leave deal and bring our country back together again. In 2015 I never expected political division to make living rooms tense and communities divided. I wish we could have it back and this stalemate to be over.

MissAdventure Fri 06-Dec-19 23:16:11

Of course I do, and I don't doubt that it is true.

Labaik Fri 06-Dec-19 23:13:02

Do you CARE that it 'might' be true MissAdventure?

Starblaze Fri 06-Dec-19 22:54:35

Elements of the far right tend to have much more than just racism going on. Just look at how quickly the popularity of Britain First rose before they rightfully lost their platforms and their freedom.

MissAdventure Fri 06-Dec-19 22:51:48

I never said I choose to believe it isn't true, labaik. I said I doubted, which is entirely different, and I was referring to the overall hate crime figures, which cover much more than racial abuse.

Starblaze Fri 06-Dec-19 22:50:45

Or perhaps fighting back against the left, the precious snowflakes who just want to find a way to not offend people by people who are quite happy being offensive thank you very much.

MissAdventure Fri 06-Dec-19 22:49:03

Well, hate crimes cover so many things, don't they?
Sexual preferences, gender fluidity, and so on.

Is it all people who voted for brexit committing them?

Labaik Fri 06-Dec-19 22:48:50

..that was in reply to MissAdventure.

Labaik Fri 06-Dec-19 22:47:57

So you've no idea if it's true or not therefore you choose to believe it isn't true? Have you not read any first hand accounts of people being racially abused post referendum?

Chewbacca Fri 06-Dec-19 22:47:24

So it hasn't resulted in people being told to 'go back to your own country' then

Absolutely certain is has Labaik; I just doubted that it had resulted in a quadrupling of cases, as was initially claimed.

growstuff Fri 06-Dec-19 22:46:41

Neither have I, but I wouldn't be so certain about doubting something, of which I have no evidence.

MissAdventure Fri 06-Dec-19 22:45:30

Well, the guardian article gives figures, though obviously I've no idea of their accuracy.

growstuff Fri 06-Dec-19 22:44:18

Why do you doubt it MissAdventure? Or is it just a gut feeling?

Labaik Fri 06-Dec-19 22:43:52

So it hasn't resulted in people being told to 'go back to your own country' then?

MissAdventure Fri 06-Dec-19 22:41:49

I doubt brexit is to blame for the increase in most of rising hate crimes.

Starblaze Fri 06-Dec-19 22:34:13

It is doubled, not quadrupled though I don't know where I got quadrupled from. Most hate crime goes unreported though. It may be that I read an article that accounted for unreported crime. Personally, when it comes to seeing people be openly racist, I've seen it go from 0 to crazy.

www.theguardian.com/society/2019/oct/15/hate-crimes-double-england-wales

Chewbacca Fri 06-Dec-19 22:31:33

Really? I thought that Full Fact was a registered charity. (registered charity (no. 1158683)

Full Fact fights bad information.
We’re a team of independent fact checkers and campaigners who find, expose and counter the harm it does.

Quercus Fri 06-Dec-19 22:27:41

My DCs resent their GPs who voted leave and I don't blame them. Their question to me and their DF (we also voted remain) was 'why are they (GPs) ruining our future?' It's a fair point.

Starblaze Fri 06-Dec-19 22:24:59

I don't trust full fact, run by tory party donors.

Hetty58 Fri 06-Dec-19 22:04:14

Starblaze, you say: 'Hate crime quadrupled after Brexit' but I can't find any evidence whatsoever for that. Your source?

Reported hate crime did increase, but only according to some figures, with the reasons difficult to identify. Of course, 'reported' crime is very different to actual convictions.

Police changed their recording method and it's also a matter of perception (whether a victim believes it was a hate crime).

According to the Crime survey, there was a dramatic reduction in hate crimes. The Home Office, though, reported increases ('spikes') after Brexit and even higher ones after the terrorist attacks (perception?):

fullfact.org/crime/hate-crime-england-and-wales/

Chewbacca Fri 06-Dec-19 22:01:24

she just has to bite her bottom lip and get on with sticking needles in them.

There must be times that your friend enjoys her job very much Labaik, depending on who she's jabbing! smile

ananimous Fri 06-Dec-19 21:58:42

I do wonder if those arguing about Brexit with family and friends would have fallen out eventually about something trivial sooner or later anyway. I voted remain, but would vote leave given another referendum. I don't have a problem with people who exercise their democratic vote whichever way they like though, and nobody I know has a split family due to different opinions. Maybe a bit more tolerance is needed of other peoples right to believe what they will.

Labaik Fri 06-Dec-19 21:53:53

'If you knew people who were racist before brexit, I'm surprised you didn't distance yourself long ago

I asked that very same question at 17.15 MissA but got no response. It seems so obvious! Why would you have anything to do with anyone, on any level, if you know, thought or suspected that they are racist?'apologies for that but I've actually been watching the debate. Sometimes, you have to work with people. Or they're friends of friends and you can't avoid them socially. Or it's a very dear friends husband. So you just don't respond to their comments and hope that it dawns on them that every time they make a remark that's offensive you ignore it and change the subject. I'm possibly meeting someone socially on Sunday that described someone as a 'darkie'. So I shall just keep out of their way so as not to make others feel uncomfortable. And I no longer work so don't have to put up with racist comments there. A friend of mine is a phlebotomist and hears racist comments on a regular basis; she just has to bite her bottom lip and get on with sticking needles in them.

Starblaze Fri 06-Dec-19 21:34:19

Yes I agree

Starblaze Fri 06-Dec-19 21:34:01

Oh, sorry, tired today

Hetty58 Fri 06-Dec-19 21:32:19

Starblaze, my comment was not directed at you, rather at the remainers who just assume that leavers must be racist - which is very insulting.