Starblaze, maddyone and growstuff ... many thanks Ladies.
I have been pinching from Peter to pay Paul for many years now, as I became unable to work around a decade ago after 21 operations which generally mostly failed, and have been left in a bit of a state now, with further medical issues (now compounding the initial one which began in 1998). but now my very poorly mentally ill daughter has had to return to the fold, I have lost a load of my benefits (why does that make me any less disabled??) So I am now struggling big time to meet my financial commitments, and looks like I may have to sell the roof over my head, leave my small support network, my 2 DGD, and my very good GP and move back to the north so that I can be mortgage free. This will send my daughter into a spiral of suicide attempts again as her perceived 'fear of abandonment' will come true .... this is so difficult, I have been via many charities now, but none seem able to help me - my Council is now wanting me to pay for the help I get (appealed twice now as I just cannot give them what I haven't got!) and the Child Maintenance Service says I owe some money to my ex husband (who earns a fortune!) from when my now almost 27 year old daughter lived with me about a decade ago! If I do owe then fine, but they refuse to tell me why and when, so I am unable to check my records! It's like going up to someone in the street and saying they owe you a tenner for no reason! Physically and mentally I am declining fast I feel now due to all this stress .... as for Christmas, bah humbug!!