If I as a straight woman said something wasn’t homophobic and a gay person said to me that it was and that my perspective was informed by the fact I was straight, I wouldn’t be so bloody arrogant as to say they were wrong. I’d listen to them and reflect on it. As I’ve said elsewhere on GN there are nuances in racism, sexism, homophobia etc that those most affected negatively by them are much more attuned to and aware of. It’s the height of white privileged to ascertain you understand racism - the irony of that is astonishing. It’s one reason I won’t have any transwoman go unchallenged when she tells me she knows what it likes to feel like a woman.