Look at Me

This is such a distressing and troubling case. I don’t I could cope with the nightmare that Sarah’s family have to live through for the rest of their lives.
We all think that people we know and love are incapable of doing dreadful things, but this isn’t always the case, sadly. I worked in an area of healthcare where we frequently saw women who were adamant and truly believed that their husbands/partners were paragons of virtue and we knew that it simply wasn’t true. The lies that some of the men told were ludicrous, but they were believed. Despite this, I still struggle to come to terms with the fact that a much liked and respected colleague was arrested and prosecuted for being an active paedophile some years ago. It shocked me to the core. I still can’t believe that this apparently affable and generous man had such a secret.

My heart goes out to Sarah’s family. I cannot begin to know how they feel. I wish the press would stop reminding us that her murderer has a wife and family. Along with Sarah’s family a life sentence has also been imposed on them. How must his children feel, now or in the future?

My heart goes out to that poor family losing their daughter in such a despicable way, he's a monster.
You only have to look at anger shown on the streets over petrol to show how some people cannot seem to control tempers and actions at all.
When I was in my 20s I was stalked by a man. He phoned the moment I got in from work, was able to tell me what I had bought at my local shop, where I had been and even threatened to attack my boyfriend when he shouted at him down the phone to leave me alone. I had to contact the police in the end and I was told to blow a whistle down the phone as it would hurt his ears! That was it and obviously it didn't help, but it was my sister who finally seemed to get through to him and it stopped. It was frightening to think how far it maybe could of gone and the police didn't seem to want to know. We need trust in them to protect us and I really think the public has lost a lot of respect for them, especially when we are hearing of some of the covering up that seems to be happening in the force.

Thanks Blossoming I just didnt have the energy. Apparently we are not genteel enough in expressing our concern.

Bit off topic but the people of Dunblane never though a madman would run amok there with a gun, until he did.

Nowhere is immune.

Coco51 “I don’t like the aggressive stance taken by women.”

Words fail me.

Shirlb

Guessing depends where you live personally around us is still safe???

Until something dreadful happens.

GoldenAge

There is a huge difference between humans and animals - we as humans have the ability to choose on the basis of rational thought rather than responding to basic survival instincts and men should not be even one teensy weensy bit exonerated for preying on women on the basis of evolution. This whole issue of women's safety, of women feeling safe and of being able to voice that feeling without fear of stigmatisation is as important as Black Lives Matter and deserves a permanent high-profile platform that isn't damaged by ideas pertaining to evolution.

I hope that we never again see anti-woke posts on GN.

25Avalon

Whitewavemark2

Misogyny should be made a crime.

Just so. The MP forBristol is asking all men to stand up against misogynistic attitudes and remarks by fellow men. The whole culture where women are merely seen as means to an end rather than persons in their own right needs to change.

That’s what I mean when I say it is not up to women but the men MUST take responsibility.

Whitewavemark2

Crace

“After 6 months of thinking about the issue, the best the police can come up with is “flag down a bus””

Last bus here is 5pm.
Take a taxi and hope it's not someone like Worboys (John Derek Radford).

I despair.

Guess what, Shirlb??
I might have similarly said that my town seems fairly safe- small seaside town, not a huge amount of crime.
Guess what? Wayne Couzens lived in my town. Who knew? I wouldnt be so complacent.

Jess20 - there are lots of anger management interventions up and down the country and they are not just for men as there are plenty of women who feel such urges. The AIPT service available from all GPs will refer anybody who asks for it to mental health services and that starts with a six week programme of CBT. Anyone who approaches a GP and is open in saying they have anger issues will be offered treatment. The big issue is that lots of people who do experience feelings of anger don't recognise what they are feeling or that they can change and here there's a need for more emphasis in schools and on behalf of parents to educate children in these matters so that the stigma so many people still feel about asking for help in their mental well-being disappears. I know that mental health services are not what they should be but in fact there have been huge moves forward especially since the start of the pandemic to provide immediate help points for people experiencing psychological disturbance. The GP and the Internet are first points of call to become aware of what's available.

There is a huge difference between humans and animals - we as humans have the ability to choose on the basis of rational thought rather than responding to basic survival instincts and men should not be even one teensy weensy bit exonerated for preying on women on the basis of evolution. This whole issue of women's safety, of women feeling safe and of being able to voice that feeling without fear of stigmatisation is as important as Black Lives Matter and deserves a permanent high-profile platform that isn't damaged by ideas pertaining to evolution.

I do wonder where a man with violent urges or anger management issues, but wants to do something positive about it rather than carry our violent acts, can go for help these days. Mental health, alcahol and drug services have been deccimated, domestic abuse services are not properly funded. No idea where else they might ask for help or be referred to for help. Just wondering what options there were, can't lock people up 'just in case'.

Whitewavemark2

Misogyny should be made a crime.

Just so. The MP forBristol is asking all men to stand up against misogynistic attitudes and remarks by fellow men. The whole culture where women are merely seen as means to an end rather than persons in their own right needs to change.

Caro57

My DD is completely exhausted and stressed trying to deal with the workload she has been given because they are so short staffed - she’s in CID. The problem is lack of funding for ‘feet on the ground’ not so much what the vast majority do

It started in 2010.

All the chickens are now coming home to roost as a result of Tory actions and inaction over a decade.

Whitewavemark2

Daisymae

Have been thinking about this today and wondering if attacks on women are now more prevalent? Or do women report attacks more often? I don't know the historical answers but one thing I do know is that apart from ensuring that attacks are taken seriously and appropriate punishments metered out, we should be looking at the cause. I can't help but think that the normalising of pornography, the exposure of children to these websites, brings aberrant behaviour into the mainstream and makes it acceptable. The internet is years ahead of the law, maybe women and children are paying the price??

98% of reported rapes are not prosecuted.

What is the point of reporting violence? How many more acts of violence go unreported by women?

The rate of prosecution of rapes needs to be addressed. We all know its difficult, but the vast majority of women would not report an attack without a cause. On one hand of course women should report these crimes, but I couldn't blame anyone who didn't feel that they could go through the process, especially bearing in mind the delay with prosecution.

My DD is completely exhausted and stressed trying to deal with the workload she has been given because they are so short staffed - she’s in CID. The problem is lack of funding for ‘feet on the ground’ not so much what the vast majority do

Misogyny should be made a crime.

Daisymae

Have been thinking about this today and wondering if attacks on women are now more prevalent? Or do women report attacks more often? I don't know the historical answers but one thing I do know is that apart from ensuring that attacks are taken seriously and appropriate punishments metered out, we should be looking at the cause. I can't help but think that the normalising of pornography, the exposure of children to these websites, brings aberrant behaviour into the mainstream and makes it acceptable. The internet is years ahead of the law, maybe women and children are paying the price??

98% of reported rapes are not prosecuted.

What is the point of reporting violence? How many more acts of violence go unreported by women?

Crace

“After 6 months of thinking about the issue, the best the police can come up with is “flag down a bus””

I don’t like the aggressive stance taken by women. Women are not alone in being unsafe: yong teenagers stabbed, gay men attacked are too regularly reported. This is a whole society issue. The police are too complacent when investigating crime or, indeed, policing themselves. This man was known to have problems and they did nothing. Today we have reports of the under cover officers creating relationships and even having children in exploitative investigations. There needs to be more accountability at all levels.

Surely the other police on the WhatsApp must be sacked. If you are a teacher and act inappropriately or post inappropriate items on FB you can be sacked. There are certain professions where your life outside of work has the same standards as in work.

Women are in danger from a small number of dangerous deviant men who are physically stronger. Why do they behave like this - is it congenital, up bringing, peer group, reading pornographic material, or even miswiring in the brain? If we could find out what then we could try to keep such individuals off the streets. Women should be able to go out anywhere at anytime safely. The sad fact is we can’t. If I was in the States I would carry a derringer. Here it’s just a rape alarm. Pepper sprays are not permitted although dyes are.

Have been thinking about this today and wondering if attacks on women are now more prevalent? Or do women report attacks more often? I don't know the historical answers but one thing I do know is that apart from ensuring that attacks are taken seriously and appropriate punishments metered out, we should be looking at the cause. I can't help but think that the normalising of pornography, the exposure of children to these websites, brings aberrant behaviour into the mainstream and makes it acceptable. The internet is years ahead of the law, maybe women and children are paying the price??

The police are institutionally misogynistic and racist.

It is impossible to come to any other conclusion.