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Nicola Bulley 45y Old mum of 2 little girls missing from River Wyre area since last Friday morning at 9:15am walking her dog, Willow.

(797 Posts)
Urmstongran Tue 31-Jan-23 17:18:37

This, in the news is breaking my heart.
I hope she comes home safe soon - but every passing day is such a worry.

DiamondLily Mon 20-Feb-23 08:11:10

It's surprising that the Police and public searchers, police dive teams, and the so called diving expert didn't find her, and it's sad that this is how it seems to have ended.

But, I suppose it will give the poor family closure, and a chance to mourn.

The behaviour of some members of the public with this has been dreadful.🙁

Germanshepherdsmum Mon 20-Feb-23 08:05:41

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I just wanted to make the point that people often believe, so wrongly, that they are doing the best thing for their family, doing their family a kindness. They act out of love for them. I expect that with the inquest we will hear more about the realities of Nicola’s life and problems. It’s all very sad.

Joseanne Mon 20-Feb-23 07:55:38

flowers GSM. I'm pleased you were helped to work through your affliction.

Kandinsky Mon 20-Feb-23 07:14:04

I think she fell In accidentally.
Not saying I’m an expert in suicides, but what I do know is many plan their deaths, often leaving a note.
This looks like a tragic accident.
Just puzzled as to why her body wasn’t found in the initial searches?

Hetty58 Mon 20-Feb-23 01:43:42

Whatever the cause, whatever happened - it's just so very sad that she's gone.

If it was suicide, Urmstagrams:

'People who take their own lives are not thinking rationally. The usual niceties in life, responsibilities, straight thinking all go out of the window.'

is spot on. As with extreme physical pain, emotional pain can be sudden and overwhelming. The only thought is wanting the pain to stop.

hollysteers Mon 20-Feb-23 01:18:50

GSM so glad your mother stepped in in time 🌷

Kate1949 Sun 19-Feb-23 23:57:43

GSM flowers

Wyllow3 Sun 19-Feb-23 23:53:12

overthehill

We don't know as yet that she drowned. I find it strange that after all the intensive searching, she has now suddenly appeared. Could she have possibly be put in the river after death. Just saying.

It will come out in the PM, could be some time.

Callistemon21 Sun 19-Feb-23 23:27:55

I remember the case of Genette Tate as we lived not far away. The police believed Robert Black was guilty and were hoping that a prosecution could be possible but Black died just before this happened.
However, no trace of Genette has ever been found.

overthehill Sun 19-Feb-23 23:25:33

We don't know as yet that she drowned. I find it strange that after all the intensive searching, she has now suddenly appeared. Could she have possibly be put in the river after death. Just saying.

Maggiemaybe Sun 19-Feb-23 23:24:33

The convicted serial killer Robert Black was going to be charged with Genette Tate’s murder. However, Black died as the file went to the CPS and they decided not to proceed with the case.

Wyllow3 Sun 19-Feb-23 23:23:32

GSM, flowers

Zoejory Sun 19-Feb-23 23:18:14

Callistemon21

mumofmadboys

Calli- the Ben Needam case was solved several years ago. A builder admitted on his death bed that he was using a digger or something similar and accidentally killed him. He buried Ben and didn't say anything at the time.

When our first baby was stillborn I found a book published by the NCT of other peoples accounts of losing children very helpful reading in the early days of my grief. Therefore I can see how other people who have lost loved ones to drowning can find it helpful/ useful to read this thread.

I didn't know that mumofmadboys
However, no trace of Ben has ever been found and the case has not been closed.

Quite right, Callistemon. The son of the gentleman involved has said his father had nothing to do with the case.

www.itv.com/news/calendar/2017-01-20/son-of-greek-digger-driver-my-father-did-not-kill-ben-needham

Very sad for Ben's family. There was a girl, many years ago who disppeared, Genette Tate. No trace was ever found of her either. Along with many others

Callistemon21 Sun 19-Feb-23 23:07:18

mumofmadboys

Calli- the Ben Needam case was solved several years ago. A builder admitted on his death bed that he was using a digger or something similar and accidentally killed him. He buried Ben and didn't say anything at the time.

When our first baby was stillborn I found a book published by the NCT of other peoples accounts of losing children very helpful reading in the early days of my grief. Therefore I can see how other people who have lost loved ones to drowning can find it helpful/ useful to read this thread.

I didn't know that mumofmadboys
However, no trace of Ben has ever been found and the case has not been closed.

Maggiemaybe Sun 19-Feb-23 23:06:22

So it looks as though this poor woman went into the river, just as the police said all along was the most likely thing to have happened. I fail to see how that makes them incompetent. All the wild theories and accusations that have whirled around since day 1 came from amateur sleuths, not from them.

Sadly, when people drown without witnesses, it can be very difficult to find them, as currents and all things lurking beneath (weed, debris, etc) come into play. If not held down by something like this, it is normal for them to surface within a few weeks.

Let’s hope we see an end now to all the horrendous and hurtful speculation in the press and on social media, and that the police and coroner can be allowed to do their job. The family will now have to face the agony of the inquest, and yet more media intrusion. Until then they should be left alone to grieve.

overthehill Sun 19-Feb-23 22:49:02

lemsip

A man and a woman walking their dog discovered the body and called police, it is understood.

Isn't it always

lemsip Sun 19-Feb-23 22:06:12

A man and a woman walking their dog discovered the body and called police, it is understood.

Wyllow3 Sun 19-Feb-23 21:52:22

Correct, “if it was”.

Wyllow3 Sun 19-Feb-23 21:51:56

I have heard people say that’s how they’d felt. My sister is one (she didn’t take her life ultimately)
There is also a state of mind which is so enveloping that the pain overwhelms everything.
The great tragedy, is suicide it was, is that she was not able to express it and get help, for although MH services are dire, this would have prompted immediate action.

25Avalon Sun 19-Feb-23 21:48:59

Still lots of unanswered questions. I think the pm will answer a few of them. Until then I guess we have to wait and see. At the moment it doesn’t quite stack up.

Germanshepherdsmum Sun 19-Feb-23 21:44:55

I have been there, with severe post natal depression. I planned it very carefully and decided to take my baby with me. It would have been drowning, in the same place that another young mother had recently taken her life. I thank God that my mother recognised what was happening and got me help. People in such situations believe they are acting entirely rationally, for the good of their families. I had that belief. It was only with the benefit of hindsight and treatment that I realised I was wrong.

Anniebach Sun 19-Feb-23 21:42:49

BlueBell definitely true that there are mothers who take their lives for the reason you gave.

Urmstongran Sun 19-Feb-23 21:28:52

Skewed thinking indeed BlueBelle and beyond heartbreaking to think that way. Those poor girls would be overjoyed if their mummy walked in tonight. Such a tragedy she believed otherwise.

BlueBelle Sun 19-Feb-23 21:02:53

I m afraid I do think it was suicide when it first happened I was talking to a psychologist friend and I said it can’t be suicide she wouldn’t leave those little girls and she replied it’s the very reason she would, because many women /mothers who are depressed or have mental health issues believe their children would be better off without them, they feel they are harming their child with their problems

mumofmadboys Sun 19-Feb-23 21:02:13

Monica -thanks for the correction. I have obviously remembered it wrongly. Apologies.