Gransnet forums

News & politics

Dickensian Britain

(81 Posts)
westendgirl Sun 03-Dec-23 12:29:25

I have just read a piece in the Sunday Times about a school in Peckham where 4 in 5 of the pupils are homeless.The school is providing breakfast, lunch and dinner and is collecting food,second hand clothing and helping in every way they can.
The stories told are heart breaking. This should not be happening , surely?

welbeck Tue 05-Dec-23 19:25:37

B&B accomm for the homeless is nothing like the cosy seaside guest-houses of childhood holidays.
they are grim. and often risky environments.
breakfast, if provided at all, is often a box of cornflakes left at the end of a corridor.

HelterSkelter1 Tue 05-Dec-23 19:28:00

The Shelter website explains what BnB accommodation is and how unsuitable it is for families. No cooking facilities, no separate bathroom facilities.

It is nothing like a BnB you might stay in on a holiday.

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 05-Dec-23 19:59:23

There is still no excuse for sending a child to school without breakfast.

spabbygirl Tue 05-Dec-23 20:24:49

I work in fostering and adoption as a social worker and these stories are just average. I can't tell you their exact stories but think of multiple moves in care as there aren't enough foster carers (you need a house big enough for at least 1 extra bedroom) a young person not at school, she's so behind because of her problematic home life its easier to mess around at school rather than let it be known she's way behind. I can't tell you how much I loathe this gov't cos we used to have Sure Start Centres and Youth Groups started by Labour which helped parents so much. Needless to say there are more children in care now, the squeeze on money will add to family stress now. And we have a prime minister richer than the king, who tells hard up working families to get another job. They have another job, it's called parenting. I can't wait to get this gov't out

Nannee49 Wed 06-Dec-23 00:48:22

Well said, spabbygirl. You work at the sharp end and know the true heartbreaking reality.

Iam64 Wed 06-Dec-23 08:16:31

Well said spabbygirl. I retired 12 years ago but the reality of the lives of children and families I knew over many years stay with me.
13 years of unnecessary austerity has devastated, destroyed the preventive and support services that helped so many. As well as family support workers and Sure Start the drug and alcohol teams are overstretched and under resourced. There are more drug/alcohol dependent parents who are unable to meet their children’s needs. Children who don’t eat between their school dinner and whose parents don’t get them to school on time or at all.
Homelessness is increasing, adding to depression, substance misuse that go with inadequate parenting.
The worst thing is, it seems so many Conservative MPs don’t care.

spabbygirl Wed 06-Dec-23 12:09:07

Thanks so much Nannee49 and Iam64, it is horrendous the way this gov't treats people

HousePlantQueen Wed 06-Dec-23 12:42:00

Germanshepherdsmum

It is and I don’t think there is an excuse for it. Breakfast doesn’t have to be expensive, and presumably for those housed in a B&B it’s included in the cost. Does anyone know otherwise?

I think you will find that B&B accommodation provided as emergency accommodation is nothing like any cosy memories anyone on here may have of holidays spent in a seaside B&B. The reality is a family living in one room; that is sleeping, watching tv (if there is one), playing, doing homework. Cooking facilities, if there are any, are shared, as are bathroom facilities. Thus many end up depending on cheap, poor nutrition from local take aways. That's without the worry of sharing a bathroom with strangers.

Nannee49 Wed 06-Dec-23 12:44:00

It's you we should all be thanking spabbygirlflowersyou make an actual difference to people's lives in the face of the contempt, hypocrisy and sheer heartlessness of Tory rule.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 06-Dec-23 13:19:24

It doesn’t have to be a cooked breakfast HPQ. It is perfectly possible to provide breakfast cheaply and without cooking facilities. There is no excuse for sending a child to school with an empty stomach.

HousePlantQueen Wed 06-Dec-23 13:29:00

Germanshepherdsmum

It doesn’t have to be a cooked breakfast HPQ. It is perfectly possible to provide breakfast cheaply and without cooking facilities. There is no excuse for sending a child to school with an empty stomach.

without a fridge or cooking facilities in your one room, it is tricky to even provide a bowl of cereal, let alone a slice of buttered toast and a hot drink.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 06-Dec-23 13:32:39

Long life milk? A kettle? A sandwich? There is no excuse.

growstuff Wed 06-Dec-23 15:14:11

Germanshepherdsmum

It doesn’t have to be a cooked breakfast HPQ. It is perfectly possible to provide breakfast cheaply and without cooking facilities. There is no excuse for sending a child to school with an empty stomach.

Have you tried making a sandwich without a knife and chopping board/plate or a warm drink without a kettle, spoon and some kind of drinking vessel? Plus somewhere to store your "equipment" and food and wash up?

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 06-Dec-23 15:43:19

I doubt they are quite that desperate growstuff - do you have evidence that mothers of children are not receiving breakfast because their mothers don’t have access to any such items?

HousePlantQueen Wed 06-Dec-23 22:46:35

Nice pot of gruel eh GSM? Could keep that warm over a candle I expect.

Attlee Wed 06-Dec-23 22:57:41

This is a desperately sad thread. Talk of workhouses, asking for 'evidence' that mother's who are in the desperate situation of trying to bring up their children in a grotty b and b, have or do not a toaster, is beyond demoralising.
What on earth have we become?

growstuff Wed 06-Dec-23 23:29:59

Germanshepherdsmum

I doubt they are quite that desperate growstuff - do you have evidence that mothers of children are not receiving breakfast because their mothers don’t have access to any such items?

Not evidence which would stand up in court - no.

However, I've been terrifyingly close to homelessness (with two young children) myself. Some years ago, I also worked with mothers (usually) who were being supported by a local charity. I saw where one of them lived and I was told by others of their accommodation. By the way, this is one of the wealthiest districts in the country, so isn't typical - there are small pockets here, but other councils are completely overwhelmed.

Many of the mothers had some kind of mental health problem and others had anxiety etc exacerbated by the situation they found themselves in. They were so ground down by life that they didn't think rationally.

Getting back to breakfast ... the mother I supported lived in a single room with her child in accommodation provided by the council. It was a run-down motel and infamous locally as a drug buying hub. Residents weren't allowed electrical appliances such as a kettle or a toaster. There was no communal area for preparing food. Her room had evidence of mice and there wasn't a flat surface where she could have prepared anything, nowhere to store cleaning materials, basic crockery or food.

She was suffering from insomnia, so found it challenging to get up in time to get her child ready for school and didn't have family to help. The accommodation was quite a distance from where she had previously lived, so didn't have local friends and neighbours to help. She used to buy packets of the cheapest biscuits, which she sometimes gave her child for breakfast and lunch at school. Biscuits, of course, don't need any preparation but they're not very nutritious.

Councils are not supposed to put families into b and b accommodation, but there just wasn't anywhere more suitable. She lived there for nine months before she could be moved to a council flat. I lost contact with her after that, when she found a new partner. At the risk of sounding non-PC, she wasn't the brightest and had a sh*tty upbringing herself, but she loved her child. The child's father had been abusing her and I sincerely hope that she hasn't fallen into a similar relationship.

So I have absolutely no doubt that some parents and their children are that desperate and I know I've only seen the tip of the iceberg.

growstuff Wed 06-Dec-23 23:30:57

HousePlantQueen

Nice pot of gruel eh GSM? Could keep that warm over a candle I expect.

Don't be silly! B and bs don't allow candles on health and safety grounds. hmm

nanna8 Thu 07-Dec-23 05:05:54

I was thinking for some a pot of gruel might actually be an improvement. We don’t hear so much about kids with no breakfast here but I am sure it happens. Looking back, my ‘breakfast’ every day as a child was a bowl of Kellogg’s cornflakes, mostly with milk but sometimes we ran out. I got it myself. I wouldn’t have described myself as deprived.

growstuff Thu 07-Dec-23 07:20:55

I can't think why you should ever have been considered deprived nanna8. Cornflakes aren't the healthiest of breakfasts, especially without milk, but at least you had them in the house and a bowl and spoon to eat them.

Whitewavemark2 Thu 07-Dec-23 07:37:22

Germanshepherdsmum

Long life milk? A kettle? A sandwich? There is no excuse.

You are living in cloud cuckoo land.

There is every excuse for some children that go to school hungry. Usually because their parents live such chaotic lives and often hardly notice that their children exist let alone feed them ,wash them etc. They “love” them but not in the way that is normally acceptable.

Then of course there are some parents with severe mental health issues or the child may live in a violent household.

There are so many excuses for a child going to school hungry that you would run out of fingers counting them.

growstuff Thu 07-Dec-23 07:58:50

I'm not disputing that WW, but the mother and child I supported weren't like that. As I wrote before, the mother wasn't terribly bright and she'd had a problematic childhood herself. She'd left school with a handful of low level qualifications and found herself a job working in a supermarket. Then she met somebody who promised her the earth and she thought her wishes had come true. Unfortunately, the knight in shining armour turned to be an absolute b*s*a*d, knocked her and the child around and totally destroyed her confidence. She left home while he was at work, taking the contents of a suitcase with her and went to the local housing officer. The b & b was the best the council could provide for months. I know there are others in the same situation.

At the time I worked for a local charity which provided mentoring and signposting for two hours a week. I couldn't do much, but I made sure she was claiming all the benefits to which she was entitled and helped her fill in forms. I signposted her to organisations which could help with upskilling and finding a job. Occasionally I went shopping with her. Generally, I looked after the child while she wandered up and down the aisles. She didn't have any cooking facilities, so had to buy all food ready made. I used to give her fruit I'd bought myself and her eyes used to light up. Most of all, I tried to boost her self-confidence, which had taken a battering.

Allsorts Thu 07-Dec-23 07:59:39

If we've a housing crisis, how is this helped by thousands arriving here each year without any accomodation. You could not build quickly enough to house what we do have. Only have children you can afford to maintain yourself. If you fall on hard times and have no family that when the government should step in, what extra funding should be for. The times on the news reporters go to flats not fit for animals to live in, usually there's a tiny baby, toddlers, no husband or partner, been there years and and landlord has done nothing. Why have more children then, where are these fathers ? Who's the fathers. I fear for those children, I worked with them, they have no chance. Social workers cannot keep upwith their case loads, somleave, ask them about the situation, it's so irresponsible to have children without income and a safe place. If I was fleeing anywhere, I would be relieved to reach country which was safe. Immigration here should be peoole with a work ethic and will support themselves, tomhelp support this country, we should have a proportion of migrants shared out with other safe countries, but they have to be responsible, no more chikdren until you are housed, have work etc. It's the children that suffer every time. A lot of these high profile people with highly paid jobs and big homes, put your money where your mouth is, home a family.

Germanshepherdsmum Thu 07-Dec-23 08:00:34

Reasons why it happens, not excuses.

Whitewavemark2 Thu 07-Dec-23 08:07:03

Allsorts

If we've a housing crisis, how is this helped by thousands arriving here each year without any accomodation. You could not build quickly enough to house what we do have. Only have children you can afford to maintain yourself. If you fall on hard times and have no family that when the government should step in, what extra funding should be for. The times on the news reporters go to flats not fit for animals to live in, usually there's a tiny baby, toddlers, no husband or partner, been there years and and landlord has done nothing. Why have more children then, where are these fathers ? Who's the fathers. I fear for those children, I worked with them, they have no chance. Social workers cannot keep upwith their case loads, somleave, ask them about the situation, it's so irresponsible to have children without income and a safe place. If I was fleeing anywhere, I would be relieved to reach country which was safe. Immigration here should be peoole with a work ethic and will support themselves, tomhelp support this country, we should have a proportion of migrants shared out with other safe countries, but they have to be responsible, no more chikdren until you are housed, have work etc. It's the children that suffer every time. A lot of these high profile people with highly paid jobs and big homes, put your money where your mouth is, home a family.

Are you talking about legal immigration?