Didn't we all?

In the fifties it was touching your leg in the cinema. Or bus etc.

Thankfully nothing like that ever happened to me but as a newly wed I was dismayed when the seating arrangements at a tennis club dinner meant husbands and wives were split up.
I was seated between two men who were complete strangers. The one on my left was polite and friendly but the one on my right completely ignored me preferring to give all his attention to the young woman on his right.
Suddenly he yelled out, jumped out of his chair and ran from the room. I noticed his hand was bleeding.
Apparently he had been trying to slide his hand between the woman’s legs. Twice she tried to push his hand away without making a fuss but on the third attempt she stabbed the back of his hand with her fork.
There was no fuss. He didn’t return and she just calmly asked for a clean fork and carried on enjoying her meal.
I was full of admiration and we became good friends but I don’t think I’d have had the courage to remain so calm.

One of my teachers used to take a group of girls out to various class projects. We all squeezed into his car and the one in the front middle had the pleasure of his leg pressing against hers and his hand brushing as he changed gear.

My cousin who was about 17 decided to carry me into the house putting his hands up my skirt as he did. He then asked me to go and play upstairs while the adults talked but I knew to refuse. No one else seemed to notice.

Mine was when at 14 my oldest sister was in the maternity ward having had her 3rd son I went with her husband to visit her and we went in the cafe for a cuppa till our bus was due and he started putting his hands on my leg under my skirt, I was terrified and didn’t know what to do. After a minute of this I got up and walked all the way home in the dark I was scared he’d come after me. I never told a sole but I made sure I was never alone with him again. My poor sister never did guess why I refused to babysit the children again.

Mine was my first boss at Saturday job, kept sending me up to the stock room to fetch xyz, , then he'd follow me up there and start groping and rubbing against me. Middle aged man, his wife was downstairs The next was the 50-ish son in law of our landlord . I was about 14.

I asked my Mum what to do; she told me, "Tell them if they ever touch you again you'll scream very loud then tell their wife". I told them and it worked perfectly.

I was the only female manager in an all male environment. One day I went to a residential sales conference with my (male) manager. Goodness I was hit upon from all sides! One very persistent guy kept asking me for my room number and in exasperation I gave him my manager’s. The next morning my manager told me that he’d knocked on his door in the night and he’d sent him away with a flea in his ear. It was only later that I realised that the guy must have thought that I was in the room with my manager. No repercussions though. One can only imagine how it would be handled these days

I was 18 and in my first job. The number two guy, who was newly married asked me several times if I would like to sit on his knee. I always said ‘no’.

I had a boyfriend who I knew wasn’t the one. It was difficult telling him this at the dance hall we were both at. He followed me to the bus I was getting home and didn’t leave until the bus was pulling out of the depot. I was really scared because I lived out in the country. Later I heard he had gone back to the dance hall, broken a glass and eaten some of it, his friends took him to hospital where he was patched up.

I shared a flat with a friend when I was 17. Our neighbours were all young men. I popped into their flat one night and they all sat there exposing themselves. I fled.

Talking about doctors, I had to have a medical before going to live in Seychelles. OH’s company doctor was in Harley St. I was surprised that he felt the need to massage my breasts. There wasn’t a chaperone. I never told anyone, even OH.

Fear probably ViceVersa? Totally understandable. It’s all very well thinking what we’d do in the abstract. Reality is something else entirely.

I saw this on TV this morning and Christopher Biggins joked that it was Prince Charles’ hand moving up her thigh. The presenters were really embarrassed.

An eminent professor offered me and my tutor a lift home after a party when I was 17. My tutor tried to get the professor to take me home first but he dropped him off, then sped past my home into a wood in the outskirts of the city and tried to proposition me.... I was terrified but managed to persuade him to take me home. Unfortunately he taught my best subject which meant I had to choose a different subject as I couldn't face seeing him every day. Consequently my degree was not as good as it might have been. At least I went on to have a fabulous career and over 50 years with my wonderful husband who is 'still to the fore' but I worry that others may not have been so lucky but I did not think I would be believed if I had spoken out...and he had just married one of his - much younger students... Sadly, it also marred my relationship with my tutor who clearly knew his colleague was not to be trusted...

I know I was certainly subjected to what I would now know as sexual harassment when I first started work, but at that time, it was just something you put up with.
I was, however, assaulted on a crowded bus many years later, and if anyone had asked me what I'd do if someone had done that, I'd have said I'd have shouted, screamed, slapped the man - something along those lines.
But when it did happen, to my horror, I completely froze. I couldn't move, couldn't speak, couldn't do anything - and even as I type this, I am filled with shame because of it.

I had loads of unwelcome advances from men rubbing against me on an underground train during the rush hour, this happened regularly.

I was often warned about various men in the various jobs I had. They were usually described as handy. Just about all the women I met around that time had similar experiences.

It was commonly acknowledged that if we said anything to anybody, including family, we would be told that we must have done or worn something to encourage this behaviour.

Oh yes regularly!

I travelled on the London Underground and quite often had men pushing themselves against me on a crowded tube

A man who tried to put his hands down my top as he passed my desk in a busy office. No one mentioned it

Other events too. I was very shy back then. I wish I’d taken my shoe off and hit them in the nuts like Camilla!

Women and girls generally are very aware if the complain every aspect of their lives will be examined and exploited

Also I don’t think I led a sheltered life but I knew nothing of strangulation as a sexual pleasure technique, yet girls now are being told it’s normal.

First day in a job I was warned not to go to the basement alone. Male staff would follow. This was a bank! Even at work you were not safe

Yes. No idea wbout others of women I know.

"Trying it on".
Happened about 3 times by 3 different men.

The final one, I realised after I had been a bit naive.
We were together on a work Course.
Miles away from home.
Cant remember if the Course lasted one week or two, probably two.
The next to last day of the Course, I felt I "knew" him enough to go out with him in the evening.
Realised afterwards of course, that being on a Course for prob 9 days was not enough to know someone in those circumstances.

I did Calendargirl 1st time! 😁
Shame I’ve lost my confidence (in so many things) these days.

Certainly many of us did. My most serious/scary experience was a superior (married with 3 kids) at my work - I was new to the place. He was always trying to get me trapped in corridors and corners. Thankfully, one day an older woman saw him trying his tricks and she verbally laid into him with hair-raising fury. He never tried it again, with me, at any rate.

I had a persistent cough while I was a student at a polytechnic. The doctor wanted to examine my chest but 'checked' my breasts instead.

What a creep!

And, no, I never reported him. That was in the early 80s.

Sadly it just isn’t accurate to say a man who did what FGTs driving instructor did would be up in court now, though he might lose his job.
Many women behave as many of us did. They refuse requests as FGT did, then don’t complain or tell anyone.

Twice I had to fight an ‘old’ man off me at work one who was trying to corner me and kiss me in a tiny kitchen he couldn’t have been far off retirement age
I was a chamber maid at the time another asked me to help him take a mattress up to the storage room as we put the mattress down he pushed me down on to it luckily I was quicker than him and sprung up and out the door
No I never said anything I told the girl I was working with and she just said oh he’s a Randy old goat keep out of his way
Later I had a boss who used to brush past me always managing to touch my breasts as he went on his way Did I say a word no just tried never to get close enough

FGT

But we just accepted it, didn’t we?

It was how things were.

He would be out of a job and up in court now, as he obviously tried it on with others.

I hope you passed your test.

Every female friend I have ever discussed this with experienced some sort of attempted (or successful) “assault” in their youth. We learnt how to cope, and very few people thought of reporting the perpetrator to the police.

Mine was my BSM driving instructor. I was 18. He had me reverse around a corner into a quiet cul-de-sac. Said “switch the engine off a minute”. I was petrified when he asked me to take my top off and “try this one on that I’ve bought for my girlfriend as you look similar in size”. I refused and restarted the engine but was shaking inside. Life in the early 70’s eh? I never even reported him at the desk when we got back after the lesson. Nor did I tell my boyfriend (Himself).

The only thing I did was ring up and change instructor for my next lesson. Shows how these things stay with you though - that was 53 years ago …