Feeling so despondent - rescue dogs - ageism striking?

I wanted to rescue a dog but, because my grandchildren (10 and nearly 12) visit us regularly, I found it virtually impossible to do so. I realise that buying a puppy is not a great solution - given the number of dogs that need re-homing - but I had no option. It seems a bit short sighted of dog rescue organisations to be so prescriptive. Surely, as the OP said, a puppy of a breed that is known to be fairly good natured would be safe to re-home with children? I do think that there should be restrictions regarding very young children, say under 7 years old.

Let's face it, there are no proper checks on purchasers of dogs and any such checks depend entirely on the vendor.

Aren’t puppies and other dogs being sold by their owners via private adverts direct to public , thus cutting out the charities because it’s certainly very lucrative given the high prices asked for dogs.
Wonder if that’s why there seemed a shortage of dogs both local and National charities available for rehoming.

Some dogs have had bad experiences with children that makes the dogs unable to thrive if they live with children. Some dogs require peaceful quiet homes.

Hurdy Gurdy have a look on Many Tears Rescue. They take in unwanted puppies and exbreeding dogs. I don’t know much about that rescue so please do your own research - it could be a possibility. Maybe worth contacting your local Dog Warden in the past we’ve been asked if we could foster xyz in emergency if placements can’t be found ie if owner dies etc. It is worth puting out feelers. Good luck.

Rescues in this country have clear expectations based on years of experience. Gardens must be fenced, no young children, especially for the bigger breeds, dogs not to be left alone for long periods etc. the guidelines are there to try to avoid dogs being returned.
Good breeders have similar expectations

As others have said, approach breed specific charities. Spaniel aid, German shepherd rescue, adult labs needing homes, the doodle trust and doodle rescue to name a few. I volunteer for one of these charities and I’ve approved people to adopt who are in their 70’s with visiting grandchildren. We always visit applicants, I don’t see how phone assessments would work.

Please adopt from this country. Locally, I’ve seen too many former street dogs running at the first opportunity. They’ve not lived in houses, find the adjustment stressful

In our case we weren’t specifying age or breed, just not a big dog.

For a highly desirable breed and a puppy to boot, there was probably a list of interested parties a mile long. I would just keep going until you find the right dog for you. It's waiting patiently somewhere.

You mentioned the requirement for experience with certain breeds and how are you to acquire it, HurdyGurdy. Most dogs in rescues have issues or have been traumatised by ill treatment or being abandoned and they are not the right material with which to obtain experience! I think you or someone else mentioned resource guarding. That can be a mild or a severe issue, not to be taken lightly by an inexperienced owner.. Dogs such as GSDs can be very protective of their owners, or just one of them, and that can cause real problems. They are beautiful and intelligent dogs but many rescue GSDs really aren’t suitable for inexperienced owners, unlike many breeds that I suspect your husband wouldn’t choose. I believe his attitude is your problem here, certainly not your ages. I hope you can get him to see beyond a dog’s looks. They’re not accessories.

Zonne

But surely they have been open about their reasons: knowing this dog as they do, they don’t think it’s suitable to be with children. Not sure what else you’d want them to say.

I agree with this.

It seems likely that either the dog already has a question mark against it regarding its reaction to children, or at least it is an unknown factor, and not worth the risk of homing where there will be contact with children, however occasionally.

HurdyGurdy. Should you consider rescuing from abroad, as possibly a last resort, the charity Dylan was from is The UK Griffon Adopters & Fosterers Group. They only bring dogs to the UK if they have a home to go to which has been checked. None of them go to rescues or kennels and the group is supportive at all times. We had to ensure that our garden had fences of at least five feet high, as he is a jumper!

I volunteer at our local animal rescue home. The minimum age for children in the household is five.

I think you will be more successful at an independent rescue or as others have said breed specific rescue shelters.

If you know what breed of dog you want try breed specific rescue sites such as Golden Retriever Rescue. We have a small gentle pointer rescued through Pointers in Need. A friend found her dog through Spaniel Assist. There seem to be rescue groups for most breeds of dogs. Good luck.

Wow, your husband is seriously a red flag

You may not say anything in the application but his behaviour may give him up

I had to jump through hoops to adopt a cat last December, a family interview, references from the vet, etc.

Honestly, it made me happy they were so careful as they want the best for the cat.

If rejected, it would have stung but when a door closes, a window opens, right?

But surely they have been open about their reasons: knowing this dog as they do, they don’t think it’s suitable to be with children. Not sure what else you’d want them to say.

We were looking for an adult rescue dog for the last 2 years but have now given up. They either come as a pair, need experienced owners, or extra training, and not one that I applied for ( online/by phone) were offered to us. We still don't know why.
We have an enclosed garden, big open spaces nearby, quiet 2 adult household so thought we would be able to give a dog a good home. Came to the conclusion there cant be as many dogs needing rehoming.

It's much the same here in France the SPA & larger rescue organisations seem to make it really difficult to adopt a dog. The criteria given often exclude large numbers of people who could give a rescue dog a good home.
I understand of course they want the best possible homes but there needs to be a little more leeway. We adopted a lovely little Romanian dog last year as a companion for our other dog. We are both 75 but like the original poster we made contingency plans for the dogs should we be ill or die. The charity in Romania were more realistic about potential adopters. They do take dogs to the UK as well.

Thankyou HurdyGurdy, that is exactly what I thought a
'dog abandoner' was and said so to them.

Germanshepherdsmum

Reading the posts again, I really do think that your husband’s attitude is a big part of the problem. He seems very shallow in the types of dog he will accept, based on appearance and macho appeal.

Is your dog going to be left alone when you stop wfh? Another difficulty standing in the way of adoption if so. Going to work and leaving a dog alone for hours isn’t kind.

Having adopted a number of rescues over the years and filling in all the forms, I’m sorry to say I think your applications contain red flags.

No, the dog will never (need to) be left alone. My work has issued new "hybrid" contracts which state that our main place of work is home, and we only have to attend the office for a minimum of one day a month. This is one of the reasons that we felt that now is the time to adopt, as we won't all be out at work all the time.

My son, who lives with us, works shifts and if it was an issue for the dog to be left, we could work it that his rostered days off could fall on a day that I needed to be in the office.

I think I will just get rid of my husband, as he seems to be the stumbling block

You are right, he really is very shallow about the types of dog that he will entertain, although as I have said further up-thread, I know him well enough to know that he would love any dog that came to live with us.

We were sitting in the lounge a couple of years ago, in the summertime, when our back door was open, and out of the blue a little black curly haired dog appeared in the lounge. My husband made a massive fuss of it, and was visibly disappointed when we located the owner, and they came to collect it.

A few months later, the dog again appeared in our garden, and again, my husband went do-lally over it. (We've now worked out where he was getting in, and have fixed the fence.)

I know, although it met none of his criteria, that he would have kept that dog if the owners hadn't wanted it back!

Thank you for your post. It's helpful to have our potential errors pointed out. Although I didn't mention his stance, it is something I maybe need to work on with him.

I can understand rescue centres wanting to put the best interests of the animal first. But you seem to tick the right boxes. Keep trying - you'll get there in the end.

I remember the hoops I had to go through getting two of my cats (as kittens) during the pandemic - now the situation has turned completely round.

Good luck, and please resurrect this post when you're successful.

CatsCatsCats

After re-reading your post, it really doesn't make sense. Can you ask them to be more specific and re-iterate that the children don't live with you. Ask them the questions you've asked on here - don't let them fob you off. The situation regarding unwanted pets is serious, and I just can't see what their problem is.

I have emailed back asking if they could elaborate a little more, emphasising that the children don't live here (although I was quite clear on the application form), and if the criteria is that there will be no children around the dog at all (which seems very draconian and difficult to monitor and enforce). I don't really expect to hear back from them though.

I did see one rescue saying that in order to adopt a particular dog, there should be no neighbouring dogs. Quite what you were supposed to do if a couple of years down the line, you get new neighbours who bring dogs with them, I don't know!

Germanshepherdsmum

I assume you have a garden - someone upthread was surprised not to b allowed to adopt a cat as she didn’t have a garden (quite right imo except in the case of a cat which is already a ‘house cat’).

Could it be your husband’s keenness on a dog’s appearance which is causing problems? That wouldn’t go down well with a rescue centre- it’s not a good reason for choosing a particular dog. We’ve always had GSDs and it’s the type of dog that needs experience of the breed - especially a rescue.

Yes, we have a decent sized fully enclosed garden (20m x 60m).

We didn't mention my husband's fussiness as I knew that it would be a (very good) reason to turn us down.

The silly thing is that I know him well enough to know that he would love and dote on any dog that came to live with us.

Hithere

I also think the rescue may have been your husband's attitude as turnoff.

We didn't mention this. They said why did you want to adopt this particular dog, and I said that we prefer larger breeds of dog, that we now have time to devote to a dog (as we are not out of the house all day at work) and that we'd had experience of German Shepherds and two rescue collie cross dogs.

Maybe I should have "sold us" more strongly, but I was hoping that once they'd spoken to us on the phone and done a home inspection, we could elaborate more on us, our lifestyle and home situation.

Hithere

I forgot! Puppies and kittens have higher demand than older pets, so that could be why you could get denied

Please look for a vet and some classes just in case you are asked the same questions again

The rescue would like to see you are fully ready for the dog - that will get you bonus points

Yes, I did wonder if that was how our ages were going against us.

It seems that no vets around us are taking on new clients at the moment, so I don't quite know what we will do there.

I have been recommended, had have spoken to someone at a training centre, which sounded lovely, so if we do ever get to the point of adoption, that's one thing in place, whether it is a puppy or an older dog.

Reading the posts again, I really do think that your husband’s attitude is a big part of the problem. He seems very shallow in the types of dog he will accept, based on appearance and macho appeal.

Is your dog going to be left alone when you stop wfh? Another difficulty standing in the way of adoption if so. Going to work and leaving a dog alone for hours isn’t kind.

Having adopted a number of rescues over the years and filling in all the forms, I’m sorry to say I think your applications contain red flags.

After re-reading your post, it really doesn't make sense. Can you ask them to be more specific and re-iterate that the children don't live with you. Ask them the questions you've asked on here - don't let them fob you off. The situation regarding unwanted pets is serious, and I just can't see what their problem is.