Why does my cat not like me?

Ignore the cat , then it will be all over you ...

Madmeg

Must add that younger DD has had the current cat for about 13 years, living in three different houses. In the first two homes the cat was permanently nervous, peeing in odd places and quite a worry. Then they moved to their current home and the cat has been as happy as Larry! They have no idea why.

maybe the owners of the first 2 houses had other animals and the cat would smell the scent.

at one time we had 2 cats, when we went on holiday our grown up children were in the house looking after them., when we came home they ignored us for days, as if they were punishng us for leaving them. one cat loved to be sitting on my knee. the other one would come in, peep in the livingroom door then run upstairs, he was not sociable.

Must add that younger DD has had the current cat for about 13 years, living in three different houses. In the first two homes the cat was permanently nervous, peeing in odd places and quite a worry. Then they moved to their current home and the cat has been as happy as Larry! They have no idea why.

Danma, Colls and SaxonGrace noooooo!

It is difficult to explain to people who prefer dogs but a cat's warped personality is part of its charm.

We always had cats when our DDs were growing up - three at one point! They both got cats when they had their own places in their 20s and then acquired partners. In one DDs case her cat took to her partner who hated cats, and later took to her husband who had never in his life wanted a cat.

But I do agree that cats are unique and often you have to organise your life around them. To me, it's part of their charm!

Good old saying

You may choose dogs
But cats choose you

She will.let you know if and when she likes yo,u.

😻
x

Do cats 'love' anyone? Feel privileged the cat wants to live in your house.

My cat (whom I have had for several years) was not interested in men) but chose to idolise my new husband - who did not like cats!! The situation ended up with me being ignored, the cat sleeping on my husband's knee and my husband suffering from being allergic to the cat ! It all settled down eventually, but was never the same. Now I have no husband and no cat as they both passed away.

Get a dog

Danma

Get yourself a dog 😉

Yep!

Nanny27

Our cat can't stand either of us! 😂
For the whole 12 years of her life we have fed her and cared for her. Apparently all we are good for is opening doors and putting food down.

😂😂😂

Cats are Gods!
Humans are there to serve them.

One of my daughters had a cat, and SGS2 was sad that she didn’t sit with him or in his bed. DD suggested he be the one to feed her and let her in and out and it worked! I don’t know if that would work for all cats but it certainly did for him. Sadly the cat had to be put down recently but she was very much his cat until then.

Well Arthur, masses of sensible advice, WWM and others, many pointing out (quite accurately) that cats are a law unto themselves. And if they're rescue cats, you just don't know what has shaped their psyche.

We've a long history with cats, either one or two over many years, and they DO tend to line themselves up on one person, even if they tolerate the other partner.

One pair we had, the female was very much my cat, and the big ginger male seemed to prefer IsNibs, (though food was his first love!). When we sadly lost the older female, after a couple of months the ginger one jumped ship and transferred himself to me. But I do wonder if he'd just been ogling the small sofa that I usually sit on (lots of room for books, crochet, etc), as he'd spotted that he could nicely fill the space that my clutter usually occupied (and was slightly nearer the fire in winter months!)?

Many cats don't like being picked up, some like a comb or a brush but lots hate the things! Lots don't like excessive noise, or being made a fuss of in a rough manner -- we have one now who comes to our garden if it gets noisy over in his (several kids), he has a snooze for a couple of hours then shoves off home at dinner-time!

Just ignore the cat .
They are imperious ,fussy little creatures.
Ask your wife not to feed her so that you can .
She might change her affections .
I do think that some animals prefer one sex over another .
Have you heard people say that's funny he/she doesn't usually like men or women and their pet is loving your company ?

I've had a problem with one Siamese cat and he didn't like any men from outside though he was affectionate with men in the house .
In fact he was very keen on my father who was diabetic and didn't appreciate his paddy pawing his legs.
He was a nightmare at the vets and very difficult to treat .

I had a beautiful red setter dog as a child and she hated men and would bite and meant it.
The postman refused to deliver our mail .
The milkman had the same protest .
And the refuse men also complained .
We had to put her away when any man came to the house.
She only tolerated my father ,who really loved her .
If he spoke loudly or waved his arms about she'd growl and then, catch his hand in her teeth to tell him that she didn't like it .
We think that both animals must have been ill treated when they were very small .

Our cat can't stand either of us! 😂
For the whole 12 years of her life we have fed her and cared for her. Apparently all we are good for is opening doors and putting food down.

Some cats prefer either sex based on scent, they can tell who is a man or a woman.

Some cats just prefer one person. And are very obvious about it.

You have to realise that it's not your cat, you're it's human slave.

Exactly as everyone has said, you're trying too hard. Ignore the cat, not if it needs anything obviously, but don't instigate anything, let it come to you..or not

Get yourself a dog 😉

To misquote Kipling, she’s the cat who walks by herself and all places are alike to her - in their minds they don’t need us, we need them. That’s what I like about them. I like dogs too!

Apologies if someone has already said this ( not time to read all). I suggest that you - and only you - feed the cat and be patient, but hopefully it will decide that it had better be nice to you!

I know my daughter got a rescue cat, and had to wait a long time for it to become friendly - who knows what had been done to it by other humans?) She now is very friendly, sleeps on daughter's bed and jumps on her lap.

You do not say whether this cat is one you have had from a kitten, or if it is a stray that has decided to make its home with you.

If it is a stray, the answer may well be, as one of the other posters said of their cat that they suspect the cat has had some kind of ill-treatment from men.

Do you wear outdoor shoes in the house? A lot of cats do not care for people who tread heavily when walking.

I too suggest you ignore the cat for a while - like small children they often are attracted by the pretence from us that we don't care if they want to be near us or not.

Don’t try too hard. I’ve observed the same with my husband when we had our cats. Also, big gestures (arms out to cuddle, exaggeratedly’rough’ stroking) and speaking loudly. It won’t happen overnight, it might take months but if you follow these recommendations you’ll see a difference.
If you think you already do these just ask someone else or compare your wife’s voice and gestures with your own. You might be right, but my husband has a loud voice and doesn’t realise it! He has learnt to be quieter talking to the cats.
One more thing; if they put up resistance to being held just let them be. If they think you’re going to try to force them to stay held each time, they’ll be wary of approaching you.
When you do achieve their trust and love you will experience a great feeling. There’s nothing like the bond between a cat and a human!

Our cat is very much 'mine'. DH feeds her, strokes her and has never done her any harm, but she always runs to me, sits on my lap and favours me with purring. However when I went away on holiday in the summer all of a sudden DH got all the attention. She sat and waited for him after work, followed him around the house, sat on his lap, purred. When I returned she studiously ignored me for two days and continued to favour DH, but I was forgiven gradually and now we have reverted to her being 'my' cat again. Clearly the cat has her own self-interest at heart. Thinking about it the only thing I do on a daily basis which DH never does is get down on the floor to stroke and fuss her. She hates being picked up and DH hates lying on the floor. I dont know if that is what tips the balance when we are both here.