does your dh read?

Why don't you join a book group Maisie?
MrA would love me to crew for him in his dinghy but knows I don't like getting cold and wet and hanging around all day waiting for the wind to pick up (or die down, as the case may be) or the sea fret to lift, and that he has to find his crew from the keen sailors at the club he belongs to.
Chacun a son gout

Maisie you could be describing my DH and me. I have always read books and he never has but likes his newspapers and hobby magazines. To me it's no different to saying he likes ice-cream and I don't.

I'm finding it hard to understand why you want your DH to like the same pastime as you, especially as you say you have lots of things that you like doing together. Does he want you to watch football with him?

If the sound of the telly disturbs your reading, why not ask him to watch it wearing headphones, then you can read peacefully in the same room if that's what you want?

'I would love to be with someone who...' you say Maisie

Sounds like there is more to this than just books. What things do you have in common?

Mine reads too, and looks at me sternly over his glasses when I lower my book for a quick chat. I usually get the message.

Does he read? * Non stop* ! If it's not the paper on his iPad at 6.30/7 in the morning, it's the news on the BBC website and then after breakfast he settles down to a book - history or politics but rarely fiction. You can't move in our house for books!

Avidly ! Trouble is he insists on keeping most of them, our spare room resembles a library. He even reads whilst watching TV.
We don't have the same taste though. I read chick lit. He reads historical fiction and crime.

Not books but lots of stuff online he says he doesn't have the patience or time to sit and read a book. I don't understand it myself as I always have a book on the go.

Maisie - old dogs, new tricks? Isn't it too late to change him.? Footbsll on the telly is harmless enough - think soft top sports cars, online poker, canvassing for UKIP - things could be a lot worse!!

Thanks for all your replies, and I hear what you say - especially about the alternatives soutra. I think it was going out with a couple of very loved up friends (something I don't always feel). I remember it took me a while to get over hearing how another friend's husband always made her scrambled egg and smoked salmon in bed on Xmas morning (not literally). Very shallow, I know, and I should count my blessings.

I always thought that men tended to read non fiction although my ex was an avid reader of non fiction and yet I couldn't have a conversation with him about anything other than books or politics and I was incredibly lonely in the marriage. The S.O. is a newspaper reader [although he does read a lot of sport autobiographies etc] and we natter about just about everything. I do know exactly what you mean, though, maisie. But I'm a firm believer that if something is lacking in a marriage [with some exeptions ] it's best to find it elsewhere, and I think a book club is a great idea. You can't make someone read that isn't really interested I'm afraid.

Until my husband became unable to see 'close up' due to macular degeneration, he never read a book, or indeed was interested in reading, now however, he has discovered the joy of the audio books, and loves to sit and listen to those specially sea-faring and war stories. It is quite funny actually, because sometimes he listens to tapes and falls asleep, and I can hear him (when he wakes up) frantically searching for the place where he nodded off!
I love to read, and can get lost in a book at any time. We have always done most things together, mainly because we enjoy each others company, so it is good that I can now help him choose books which he will enjoy. His sight is o.k. for driving, just close work is the problem.

I am an avid reader and have tried to interest DH in fictional novels but he is not really interested. He did read all the Lee Child novels which leave me cold.
He reads technical books and lots of history books.

The Wonderful Man reads for a short time before he goes to sleep and/or first thing in the morning, but it's rarely a work of fiction. He reads biographies or 'study' books mostly and he has the capacity to remember what he's read for years afterwards. He's quite a deep thinker and likes to discuss what he's been reading with me, so we often have conversations over dinner or sometimes we go out for a coffee and he talks through his latest discovery. At the moment he's reading around the subject of Christian anarchy - so we're having some lively discussions about church and state.

DH and I both enjoy reading but read completely different types of books. I love Aga sagas and chicklit and he reads political thrillers and espionage books. We do vaguely talk about what we've read, but not much. Despite that we never seem to stop talking about something or another. I also read recipe books and magazines and he reads professional stuff!

Seems to me Maisie there is something else going on in your relationship that maybe relates to the feeling you have of not always feeling 'loved up'.

Personally, I can think of nothing worse than DH cooking me scrambled eggs and smoked salmon on Christmas morning (either in or out of bed!)- think of the mess you'd have to clear up before you could even get started.

I too was about to say - be careful what you wish for! Our house is almost lined with books. I only keep classics and a few books that I know I will read again, as I remember books once I have read them. DBH however keeps all of his as his and his mother's memory work differently, they can read and re-read a book many times. I have bought him a kindle to try to counter the problem, and it does seem to be working, but I still need to work out how to get him to part with a few hundred scifi books before I can decorate our dining room.

However - Ex didn't read, and seemed to resent me doing so. It was awful as I read at every opportunity. Many children used to be discouraged from reading though, it was considered a lazy waste of time, so I understand why he did feel like that. It was also considered anti-social by many.

I think it gives you another common interest. I love finding a book that I know he will enjoy.

I was always being told to go outside and play in the sunshine instead of having my nose stuck in a book when I was a child.

Now it is DH making sarcastic comments because I am on here.

Must go outside and get some

My DH is Italian! That says it all! Generally Italians don't read, not even newspapers unless they are free in the bar!! He has a habit of talking to me and then saying "I'm sorry were you reading?" !!

Didn't mention in my first post that DH reads two newspapers a day and three on Sunday. Plus woodworking, gardening, and model making magazines. He's on first name terms with our newsagent and the two sons that work in the shop.

Same here Kitty- we both read a lot, but very different books generally.
We gave to the Loros book shop tons of books when we moved (Loros is our wonderful local hospice for the terminally ill)- but we still have a 'library' here which covers a huge wall and full of 100s of books. When in Market Harborough, there is a very good charity book shop- and I just can't resist .... OH neither.

My DP spends lots of time on the internet but never reads a book or paper except occasionally on holiday. My son gave him a kindle fire when he upgraded and DP downloaded a free book. He is now on his second book so there is always hope!

Even if husbands DO read, chances are they won't like the same genre as you do.Nothing wrong with your DH just liking his newspapers, internet sports/news and maybe crosswords.I must say I don't know any couples who chat happily about the books that they have read [to each other.]We like different things, so I chat [bore possibly] to others ,mainly women about books.My DH makes me breakfast every morning [though only cooked on Sundays.]Fair division of labour though, as I make all the other meals usually.Me and my DH don't have that much in common, but it hasn't stopped us having a long and happy marriage.

Mine loves reading, but will insist on reading out the odd paragraph of his book with me, usually starting with a synopsis of the story so far, while I am trying to read my own book. It's awful to say it, but he is a bit long-winded and I end up wanting to whack him one I tend to make 'mmmm' noises, and try to concentrate, but it doesn't always work. Still, he doesn't mind me warming my feet on him in bed, so I can live with the lectures ....

Maisie - re the loved up friends and friends who say their husbands do this and that for them. I'm not disputing this for a moment but there is an old saying 'believe none of what you hear and half of what you see'.