How do you know that walking away is the right thing to do?

I think most of us get these feelings later in life. Dreams of Shirley Valentine. Do you think there are lots of people doing exciting things? I'm not so sure. As for 'university people make me feel stupid' you sound far from stupid to me. I worked for 37 years in what would be considered a 'lowly' position amongst so called intellectuals. Most of them had no clue about real life. Walking away can cause such devastation but there are those that do and are happy. Good luck.

I don't know how that "Booking.com" became a link! I didn't make it one. (Other booking sites are of course available)

I said that to my elder daughter once - "I feel I have done nothing with my life except bring up children". She gave me a right old telling off. Apparently I made a very good job of bringing all three of them up and I should be proud of myself for that. I think she has a point. They have lovely childhoods to look back on, and now they are adults that I can be proud of.

You don't have to move to be in nice places. Holiday lets outside of school holidays are quite cheap. Why don't you book a few short breaks, and then give the dates to your husband? And why not go on Booking.com and find a nice hotel abroad for you both for a few nights?

I wouldn't do anything huge, like "walking away" (that phrase makes it sound so simple - I doubt that it is). You have been with him 30 years. It's worth trying to change things before doing anything that could shatter both your lives. He is knocking on a bit now. He deserves a bit of consideration.

Do you love each other, Anniezzz09? Have you really been able to say to him how you feel? It's not just about what he likes and what you feel he needs in his life, is it? I think perhaps we let things happen to us because it's easier to allow it than make a stand for what we want and need. Like you, I'm very aware of how life is whipping by and there are so many things I want to do, and know I'll never be able to do them, but that really is life, isn't it - either through family or financial commitments, we can never really be free spirits.
However, we do owe ourselves a lot. We do need to identify and try to fulfil some of the dreams we have.
Is it realistic for you to arrange a time away for you both? Away in the wilds up north or on an island in the Hebrides? If you can give yourself this a couple of times a year, it may give you what you need and something that is there for you which your DH can share with you (even if he can't wait to get back to the city). Good luck. I can empathise with you in this, believe me. .

annie you not alone in some of what you say, your DH sounds very like mine- he lives in his head, doesn't talk much and when he does its about politics. I think if he says he would move house you might have a closer look at the potential in this- do some research on Right Move or Zoopla. It also sounds to me as though your asking yourself a number of questions that many of us can relate to at this time in our lives. Although it may look as though others are leading a more exciting life you cant be sure of this. I feel this too as we lead a quiet life really. As to feeling stupid well I still do even with a university education. A lot of things people portray about themselves i.e. confidence and knowledge can be putting on a brave face and they may feel as you do in reality. I suppose the best thing you can do is keep sharing these feelings with Gransnet - I'm sure you are not alone.

What about a holiday to somewhere you have always wanted to go to. Go with a group.

You will have lots of fun researching, and space for yourself when away.

I have travelled a lot , India, S america, Africa, It was to do with work, and I always travelled alone.
In Europe we travelled as a family.

Good luck

Your husband sounds quite adventurous. He has joined a choir and is still working. If you live in a city then there are loads of things you can do and join. Walking, book clubs, any sort of club - anything, you name it. By going through a horrendous divorce and all that it entails, what makes you think when you are by yourself that you will change and be what you think you can be. You can do that now with a supportive partner.
It sounds as if you just want a change. We all do as we get in our 60's and wonder what happened to the years. My sister left her husband of over 30 years and after 6 months was back. They went to counselling and all is now fine. Sometimes change is good and sometimes it ain't. You sound bored stiff. And just to let you know not everyone has exciting lives and travel all the time. It just seems that way to you.