Widowhood.

I realised this Christmas that the reason its so difficult a season for those who are alone (either widowed or divorced) is that when out and about, one sees so many couples. The rest of the year you dont see as many couples shopping or walking together as you do during the Christmas week.

I had to suffer the trauma of seeing my ex and his new partner (acquired by him instantly online) hand in hand in the local market. Even though I initiated our divorce after years of his disloyalty and betrayal, he was still the love of my life and its hard to accept.

As Sandie Shaw sang - "There's always something there to remind me". Christmas decorations are the most poignant - they are physical reminders of happy times.

Why don't we all go on a Gransnet cruise next Christmas?

bikergran thank you for your much appreciated welcome. As you know I am new to this virtual world and have a lot to learn. But one thing I have learnt quite quickly is that you are all a caring and comforting set of friends and I send virtual flowers to you all.

All I can say is big hugs and thinking of all of you x

Thank you biker and for you.

KatyK I hope you dh receives some good news ...

nannieroz111 welcome to GN,I shall just say this, that you would be hard pressed to find a more "welcoming, comforting, listening, advisory bunch of virtual friends anywhere in your time of need. The lovely thing is that we are "real" we do all really exist and are not some made up cyber avatar, we are real people who care about others and if we can help, advise or just be there at the end of the keyboard for a few comforting words, then some one is usually about all hours of the day.I hope you continue to pop in to GN and that we can offer you a little comfort knowing that there are many of us that have gone through the same sadness, for myself it is just over 7 months, but no matter how long wither it's many years/months/weeks days..we all remember that day,it will always so fresh in our minds.
I hope we can help you in some way, bfn

Thank you kitty. DH is a very positive man and said he is not scared. He said he just feels vulnerable and will be scared when and if they tell him there is something to be scared about. He has had wonderful treatment and the prognosis is good but still the fear is there isn't it?

I remember too, Marmight! And, I agree with Ariadne about GN. We are kind and compassionate and here for people when they need us!

I can only imagine what your thoughts are KatyK.

Yes, stay with us, Falconbird - GN is a good, compassionate community at heart. And we would miss you. X

Marmight I remember you telling us, three years ago, of your DH's death. Grief can ambush you, can't it?

to all of you who grieve, and respect and admiration for you too.

Thank you Galen for you too

12years, that was.

Marmight KatyK I'm thinking of you. I remember how horrible that time was. It's 12 in a couple of months for me!

marmight. My DH will get his results next week to see if the radiotherapy on his cancer has worked. To say I am terrified would be an understatement. So sorry for all of you who have lost your partners.

Thank you Marmight. I will take your advice about giving in to the bad days.

.... and from me too Marmight
in fact, to all who are hurting.

Marmight, ((((hugs)))).

Thanks narg. I have spoken to 2 of my 3 daughters so far, am having coffee with a friend, and then I am spending the afternoon having a facial, a pedicure and a back massage!! This is the first anniversary I have been at home, so it is all the more poignant. But, upwards and onwards as they say

Thinking of you today Marmight as you face the third anniversary.
What will you be doing?
Such wise words about giving in to the bad days. Grieve seems to have an agenda all of its own and like you I have found that the best way is to
go with it.

I've been re-reading this thread, and realise how lucky I am still to have DH. He was grumpy yesterday and after he went off to bed, I sat for ages with Gransnet for company. He's now banging about in the kitchen, after having brought me a cup of tea in bed. I'm counting my blessings.

nannieroz
I was widowed 3 years ago today.
It does become easier to bear in time; two steps forward and one back. Just take every day at a time, go at your own pace and give in to the very bad days.

Thank you Tegan and Falconbird. I hope you know how helpful you are. R x

Dear nannieroz111

It is such early days for you. I was widowed two and a half years ago and it does get better honestly although I know that's hard to believe at the moment.

The mornings are the worst for me and that's when I log on to Gransnet to see what's going on.

This is a safe place where you can express your feelings

This is a good place to find when you're sad; you'll find a lot of comfort on here. Hugs to you .

Hi GN's. I'm new to this so bear with me please. I was widowed 15 weeks ago tonight. So lonely, so painful, still can't really believe it. Nothing is the same anymore. I found this site and have been dipping in and out for about a week now. Helps me when I cannot sleep.

Notagran51